Let me tell you a story.
Approximately a year ago I wrote this fanfic as a pain-relieve. I'd just come out of a stressful period of decease, surgery and mentally abusive relationship with my best friend. In short, I was in a pretty stormy place in my life and my mental situation wasn't all that stable. The point is, I transferred all my thoughts and wishes into two existing fictional figures and uploaded it for my own sake only. It genuinely didn't matter at all if anyone would read it, let alone like it. It was for me and me only. So the last thing I expected was to gain so much from it and especially not a friend.
Still, somehow, people kept reading my fanfic and, in some cases, they even seemed to love it. The first to really express this (very vividly, I may add, considering her first words to me were DEAR GOD MORE) was said friend. I was naturally thrilled for this enthusiastic response to that little piece of my soul, only that it didn't stop there. No, the comments from her just came rolling in like a tsunami of overwhelming appreciation. One cannot help but become somewhat attached to a person who gives your ego a bigger boost than it deserves while filling some battered sense of self-worth with warmth. Don't get me wrong, I appreciate every single comment that has ever been left for me, but no one else has had quite that level of commitment. The comments turned into messaging and she turned out to be pretty fantastic.
This friend is 5 years younger than me and couldn't live more far away. She's braver than me, more mature than me and definitely nicer than me. (Don't talk back to me, Anneliese, this is not a matter of opinion.) I'm proud to know her to the extant that I do and I'm grateful as hell that she decided to pick my fanfic to get overly excited about. This kind of friendship isn't unique, it's not world defying, but it's wonderful and emotionally healthy and I'm so fucking happy for it.
I pride myself with thinking that I don't do drama and sentimentality (don't crush my self image), but right now my heart is beating, I have a uncontrollable urge to hug something and if I was just a tad bit more tired I'd probably be crying, embarrassingly enough. One thing that I do do, though, is grand gestures, which is rarely all that appreciated, but right now I don't care. I'm probably never going to meet her, which I find too sad to think about right now, but I'm still so genuinely, profoundly, breathtakingly grateful and, Annie, I just want to tell you one thing.
Thank you.
