#recreation e7

[correctrvbquotes]

Simmons runs off

Donut: Hey, where are you goin’?

Simmons: To blow up Blue Base.

Donut: Ohh, I think that's what Sarge meant by “get into trouble!”

Simmons: (flies off on the man cannon) I don't give a fuck!

[correctrvbquotes]

Cut to Sandtrap, where the other three are driving. The Warthog flips through the air

Sarge: (inhales) Yee-haw! (coughs; the Warthog lands and continues on like normal.) I told you not to take jumps bigger than my yee-haws! It makes me look bad!

Grif: Okay. This looks like it.

Sarge: Be careful, Grif. We don't want to get spotted.

Intercom: Halt. Do not come any further.

Caboose: I think we've been spotted.

Sarge: Punch it, Grif!

Intercom: You are attempting to access a restricted area, and you have entered a mine field.

The Warthog ceases movement.

Grif: A what?

Intercom: Mine field, you idiot!

Caboose: Your field? Who says this is your field—You can't own a field!

Grif: Caboose, not his field! A mine field!

Sarge: You know, the Native American culture said the Earth doesn't belong to us. We belong to it.

Grif: Guys, he means explosives!

Caboose, Sarge: Ohhh.

An explosion goes off.

Sarge: Oh!

[correctrvbquotes]

Cut to Valhalla. Donut and Lopez are standing atop a hill.

Donut: Lopez, Simmons has been gone a really long time.

Lopez: No me importa. [I don't care.]

Donut: If Simmons blows up Blue Base, Sarge is gonna be really mad.

Lopez: Sí. Él es estúpido como eso. [Yes. He is stupid like that.]

Donut: I'm worried about him...

Lopez: Sí. Porque tú eres estúpido como eso. [Yes. Because you're stupid like that.]

Donut: I think I'm gonna go over there and check on him. (runs off)

Lopez: Lo que sea. [Whatever.]

[correctrvbquotes]

Sarge: We'll be back as soon as we help the Blue. And then we'll kill him.

Caboose: Guys, I really appreciate this.

Sarge: See you soon! Try not to get into any trouble!

The Warthog drives into the water and vanishes, leaving behind only a trail of bubbles.

Caboose: Are we there yet?

Sarge: No.

Grif: Shut up.

Donut: Good luck!

Lopez: ¿Acaban de conducir dentro del agua? [Did they just drive into the water?]

[correctrvbquotes]

Tejano music begins playing as Sarge runs for the jeep

Sarge: All aboard! Let's get this show on the road!

Caboose follows Sarge inside the jeep and takes the turret.

Sarge: Hey, be careful with the new gun. It hasn't passed any real world testing yet.

Simmons: It hasn't passed any fake world testing. It's passed zero tests.

Sarge: Which means the enemy can't possibly know about it. We've got the initiative.

Simmons: [quietly] Yeah, we got something. Big dummy.

[correctrvbquotes]

Sarge: Lopez, I want you to take good care of Simmons and Donut while we’re gone.

Lopez: ¿Yo? [Me?]

Sarge: Feed them every day.

Lopez: ¿Comen Sin Plomo, o Súper Sin Plomo? [Do they eat Unleaded? Or Super Unleaded?]

Sarge: Exactly. And don't forget to let them out in the yard every now and then.

Donut: I love yard-time—

Simmons: Goodbye!

Sarge: If we don't make it back from the mission, bury me and Grif as far away as possible. I don't want to get any corpse cooties.

Grif: Why do you assume I'll be dead?

Sarge turns to look at Grif. They share a brief glance.

Grif: ...Never mind.

[correctrvbquotes]

Donut, Simmons, Sarge, Grif, Lopez, and Caboose are all standing outside the Red Base.

Sarge: Get these water cans cleaned up while we’re gone. How much water do you need to drink, Donut?

Donut: I was in a desert! Don't judge me.

Grif: Maybe we should learn from that and bring some water ourselves.

Sarge: Nonsense. It'll just slow us down.

Grif: Slow us down more than dehydration? Or death... by dehydration?

Sarge: I don't know, smartass. Let's say we try! I'll kill you, and then I'll dry you out! Who wants Grif-Jerky?

Caboose: Ah, no thanks, I already had donuts for breakfast.

Grif: ...Wait, what?

Sarge: All right, let's get going. Everybody packed?

Caboose: Yep.

Grif: Where's your stuff?

Caboose: Oh, I only carry a washcloth and six toothbrushes.

Grif: I'm gonna assume that makes sense to you.

Caboose: Yeah, it does.

Grif: Yeah, I thought so. We'll just go ahead and leave that one alone.

Sarge: Grif! Why'd you pack so much?

Grif: Me? I only did one duffle.

Sarge: Well, what are all these cases?

Donut: Those are mine!

Sarge: Donut, you're going with us?

Donut: No, but I wasn't gonna let you guys have all the packing fun to yourselves! That's the best part about going on vacation. I mean, beside airport security's full-cavity search—

Grif: Time to go! (heads towards the jeep)