“isella just told me we’re telepathically touching tips”
“SOMEONE HOLD ME BACK SHE’S DISSING MICHAEL JACKSON!”
*aggressively moaned* “FOUR IS THE SLOPE OF THE TANGENT LINE!”
“oh, this random guy on snapchat asked for pics and i told him i had to shave my wiener first. he didn’t believe i had one so i sent him a picture of a pack of hot dogs.”
*to a teenage girl in a dinosaur costume holding two prop red solo cups* “WE ARE NOT GETTING CRUNK TONIGHT!”
“STOP TWERKING ON THE STAGE, JAY!”
*after showing a picture of his very fine gf* “but……..how…?”
“we’re starting ww5 over here” “…..5?” “1, 2, skip a few”
“and then japan said: ‘FUCK you, you’re a PUSSY’”
“i got to pick up a frog-“ “it’s a toad” “his NAME is alfredo linguini gabbaghoul”
“dude i’m so hungry PLEASE let me eat your dih”
“look through the glory hole”
“can i look in the lookin’ hole”