as someone who went from a less successful good guy in dating to a more successful "toxic" guy in dating what i've learned is that women like the excitement, the danger, the unpredictability, and the challenge of a man who they perceive to be toxic versus a good guy. they see good guys as being boring. for many of these women there is no excitement in a man who is polite, nurturing, responsible, or even loyal. there is an excitement; a kind of forbidden fruit kind of excitement for women being with guys with red flags. the problem of course is that those red flags often turn into big life-changing trauma for these ladies. i always laugh at ladies who would say they want to thug and then get with a thug only to be left by the thug with two kids and a boatload of trauma. i showed them the same kind of understanding i show men who choose women significant because of how they look only to find out she's a horrible human being, a terrible wife and an even worse mother to your children. to me they all are in the same boat. also the elephant in the room is usually for these ladies the sex with the toxic guy is better than the sex with the good guy.
