#remember~

[jav-animations]

YOUR ART IS SO GOOD WHAT

Thank youuu 💖💜

[helicine]

if your heart is bleeding make the best of it there is heat in freezing: be a testament

[ireallylikescienceitismyfave]

I can't wait to find people who I will love unconditionally despite the fact that I might be upset with them. I can't wait to have them love me for every bit of my being even if I am having a rough time and can't put all of myswlf out there for them. I will build a family one day that is stable and kind and caring and worthy of my time and energy. That is my dream.

[ireallylikescienceitismyfave]

I am thinking about everything that has been happening over the past couple of years, and thinking of how much I have overcome. And not just talking about how difficult social situations were until about the end of sophomore year and going in and out of friendships, but all of the things I have moved on from with family, sexual abuse, medical issues, self care, etc. I was kicked out several times, had to pay rent for several months, almost lost my dad, and was cut off by most of the extended family I used to talk to. I was raped several times, was pregnant twice, had a miscarriage and an abortion. I was hospitalized for blindness, numbness, loss of function, found out I have MS and have lost partial function of my frontal lobes. I was depressed to the point of self harming and a suicide attempt.

I am 17 and I somehow managed to get through all of this. I was able to keep decent grades in school, despite my lack of focus. I was able to stay in band. I got a job.

I have grown so much as a person. I am able to manage my stress better now, I am comfortable in almost any social situation, I have confidence. I still have stresses that disable me sometimes, but I am always able to get over them.

People always tell me that I am extremely mature for my age, and I am. I know that I am. I have learned to center my focus on what is important and to put the past behind me so that I can live my life the way that I want to live it. And I now know that I can handle anything that is thrown at me.

[helicine]

in the end, there is only one thing that really matters: have you helped more than you have hurt?

[ireallylikescienceitismyfave]

I need to breathe, and focus on that. What is done, is done, and I can't change it, so I need to focus on handling my emotions in a healthy manner so no more damage is done.

[ireallylikescienceitismyfave]

I somehow need to force myself ro remember that I have a plan and any anxiety or stress that I am experiencing now is something that will be resolved as time goes on. I may be at my limit now, but things will change for the better eventually and I just need to hang on and go with what happens.