#rfr39

[drcknowledgeandpower]

Is Hooking Up Bad for Young Women?

This article delved into the many reasons that women hookup, as well as the positives and negatives of doing so. The term itself is ambiguous and has many different meanings for different people. The author of the article compared sexual encounters that women have within as well as outside of relationships and how media portrayal affects our perception of how things are or even should be.  There are a lot of social implications with someone who does hook up with others, and terms such as “slut”, “whore” and others can affect a woman’s self-esteem based on her sexuality although it is an arbitrary social construct. 

Although the article was heteronormative and only included hookup culture between a cis male and woman, there is a lot to be learned from what the authors offer. There is a lot of inequality in casual and serious relationships, even without meaning to, and I think that part of it has to do with the expectations that both women and men have regarding sexual encounters. However, I think that hookup culture is shifting that notion because, as the article stated, women are experimenting and figuring out what they like and do not like. In addition to that, the no strings attached mindset allows for more freedom to choose what one does with her time; in some relationships, women talked about their boyfriends being too demanding in terms of time spent together which affected all other aspects of that person’s life.

Overall, I think hooking up can only be positive if both parties understand that it is just that: hooking up. In many cases, a relationship will not come from it, so emotional attachment is detrimental to the terms set from the beginning. It is also essential that the woman is doing it for herself and her own enjoyment, and not because she feels that she is expected to by her sexual partner, her friends, or anybody else. Lastly, it is important that she is enjoying herself and getting what she wanted, because sex is not just about the man.

[drcknowledgeandpower]

DRC Event

Last week, Supreme Court Justice Sonia Sotomayor came to speak to the students of Rutgers. I felt so honored to be able to listen to her speak. Her main points throughout the interactive question and answer session were revolved around hard work, dedication, and, most importantly, passion. At one point, she told us that she’s never been one to care about what anyone thinks, as she climbed the bleacher steps despite Secret Service instructing her not to. In addition to not caring about the negative things that her peers said, she also talked about having a very strong support group. She is very family oriented and they keep her grounded, although they were starstruck when she first became a justice. Sotomayor talked about some of the challenges that being on the court created but also talked about ways that she and her loved ones combat them. She acknowledges her role as a justice is historical in that she is the third woman and the first Hispanic person, but she doesn’t let that get in the way of or sway her decisions while she’s at work. Sotomayor was a very funny person who was so passionate about her work and deeply in love with her family. I felt so blessed to see her not only because of the role that she plays in the functionality of this country, but because she had valuable lessons that are applicable to anyone’s life. 

[drcknowledgeandpower]

Intersextion

The documentary that we watched in today’s plenary was extremely important. I think that talking about the issues revolving around people falling outside of the sex binary need to continuously be talked about in social justice spaces, especially in feminism as we talk about inequality based on sex. Gender is, in part, a social construct, so forcing children to confine to one is ridiculous in its notion, especially in the case of intersex people. We as a society look at a person’s genitalia and make assumptions about who they will be based on them, and expect them to conform to these expectations. 

As a society, it is our responsibility to make issues of sex less taboo. Intersex people have done nothing wrong, and to be treated as though they did is psychologically damaging in so many ways. Forcing them to conform to a sex, or even a gender assignment is psychologically damaging, and only serves to make those around them more comfortable rather than making the person themselves more comfortable. I found it unsettling that many of them told stories of doctors assigning them a sex and doing operations for the sole purpose of future possibilities of having children. I noticed that this story was told more often for those whose genitalia were rearranged to become a vagina, and I wonder about the implications of telling a child something like that... it seems to reflect the notion that in our society, the pinnacle of womanhood is motherhood.

This documentary was extremely informative and offered insight into the lives of those who are silenced. I enjoyed watching it and learned a lot about intersex communities in the western world.

[drcknowledgeandpower]

On the reading “Love Your Fat Self”

I thought that this article was extremely insightful. The author, Courtney E. Martin, did not write about her person experience with obesity, but rather the experience of her friend and her reactions. I thought this offered a different degree of insight because she -- having never experience fatphobia -- was able to use her own bias to explain why it may be. What struck out to me the most was how she pointed out that we as a society often arbitrarily attribute certain personality characteristics to weight. This is not limited to overweight or obese people, but to people who are underweight as well, although they do not get it as bad and some of the adjectives connected to skinniness are actually positive.

Another very important point that she addressed was that, like other phobias and isms, it often exists on a microaggressive level, and most people do not mean to be fatphobic. Much of fatphobia occurs inside of one’s mind, whether it is of a person who is not overweight, but internalized in overweight people as well. I think that microaggressions are as dangerous as if not more dangerous than overt words because many people who never think about them believe that they are not a part of the problem, and therefore perpetuate it. As a society, we need to embrace all body shapes and types. I think that we need to stop arbitrarily attaching emotional or personal attributes with physical ones. Although it is hard to dismantle this system of misconceptions, it would benefit everyone, especially people who are overweight, who constantly under an eye of scrutiny.

[drcknowledgeandpower]

Plenary #2

This morning’s plenary really impressed me. I was so happy to see three women of three different faiths come together to speak to us on the intersections of different aspects of life: sex, race, and namely religion. All of the women, particularly Professor Aftab, talked about how religion (specifically Islam) was traditionally patriarchally dominated, and how that affected not only how people practiced the religion, but how it is viewed by others outside of it. The example she used was a verse from the Quran about covering one’s bosom, and how it was seen as radical at the time.

Perhaps the single most important thing to me throughout the entire session was how seamlessly their religious beliefs fit with their social views. They seemed progressive and wanted to see important changes being made in regards to how their respective religion was practiced. As Dr. West stated, she wanted to see Christianity and faith used as a tool rather than something that hindered people, especially in understanding the role it plays in the cycle of abuse and how to stop it. 

Overall, I feel that this was a message that I, and many other young women in the room, really needed to hear. I feel that a lot of young people, women especially, struggle to find a balance in faith and progressive beliefs that often contradict religious backgrounds that we may have grown up around. Rabbi Reed said that it was okay to disagree with others even of the same faith as you because it is your belief. Agreeing with her, I think that young or liberal people think that religion and liberalism cannot co-exist; these three women prove that they can and religion can even reinforce this mindset rather than hinder it. Another important thing that all three women emphasized was free-thinking and questioning traditional belief systems, and I think that by doing so, many young people can find comfort in a higher power should they pursue any sort of spirituality.

[drcknowledgeandpower]

On the reading, “What No One Tells You About Bisexuality”

The most important thing that I got out of this reading is that sexuality, or the labeling of it, is fluid for many people. By that, I mean that it doesn’t remain stagnant and consistent for all of a person’s life as she discovers what she likes and is attracted to over time. The pressure some of these women felt when they were forced to pick whether they were gay or straight seems extremely frustrating and erases an entire group of people. However, as they experienced more of life and were more open with themselves, they labeled their sexuality to fit them at the time (but most of the women who identified as bi kept that identification later on in life). The stigma surrounding the bi community is a persistent problem, and even today we and the media focus more on representing those attracted to one sex (whether it be the same or a different one), disregarding people who like more than one sex by calling them “selfish”, “confused”, and more. This article was important for me, as well as others, to read.

[drcknowledgeandpower]

Plenary #1

Today’s plenary was an interesting one. The speaker didn’t speak overtly of feminism but it seemed, instead, to be a core value in her system of beliefs. It was prevalent when she talked about being assertive in an environment of mostly old, white men. It was apparent when she talked about understanding other cultures, both domestically and abroad, in places like Haiti and Bangladesh. I especially liked how she noted that there is no right or wrong answer, but rather that they are more complicated than what meets the eye, and that it’s important to continue to ask questions in order to get closer to the truth. As important to her as asking questions, it seemed, was empathy toward subjects with a degree of objectivity. She was engaging and interesting, and while not being a Feminist Speaker, I loved hearing what she had to say.