An Archive of Our Own, a project of the
Organization for Transformative Works
After the firing of Dick “Magic Ears” Knubbler, Abigail Remeltindtdrinc becomes Dethklok’s newest producer. Her unorthodox approach to her job and her stance as one of the few women in the industry worthy to work with Dethklok as an equal sets her apart and puts her on an unexpected path. With nearly no way to move past the constant media assault that comes with being associated with Dethklok, she seeks solace with Devon Amalgamedle, a bartender with a passion for death metal, flowers, and romance—and whose past is even more shrouded in mystery than Abigail’s. And as she deals with both her developing trauma and her blossoming romance, the apocalypse looms overhead, bright as a blazing star.
An Abigail-focused, OC-heavy story, taking you through the untold narrative of the Record Cleaner, from her first moments as Dethklok’s producer and past her last moments with the band. See her life unfold and adapt beyond the legacy of the death metal gods.
RATING: Explicit (Mature for most chapters, Explicit chapters will be marked in the notes)
WARNINGS: Graphic Depictions of Violence, Implied/Referenced Sexual Assault
WORD COUNT: 100,620
ohhhh my god okay it's happening. everybody stay calm. stay fucking calm!
Takin’ It Easy feat. @m3gahet’s Nguyen-Crozier Family
In which Devon’s family gets a surprise addition.
It was going to be a calm day. The early July sun settled over the backyard as Devon watched their cousins Deborah and Jackson get into a heated cornhole battle. Deborah’s fiancé Ricky seemed to be both amused by her competitive nature and a bit frightened at the prospect of ending up on the opposite team as her.
“You wanna play?” Abigail asked, returning from the cooler with two beers in hand.
Devon took one from her, laughing at the idea. “Depends, would we be on the same team?”
Abigail glanced at Deborah, now pointing and yelling at her brother over some indiscretion in the points. She smirked. “I think I’d rather be on your cousin’s team.”
“Yeah, I had a feelin’. In that case, I’ll sit it out. Don’t need my wife and cousin screamin’ at me.”
“Glad you know I won’t hold back even for you.”
“Especially for me, ya mean.” Devon opened her beer, squinting at the sun as her Uncle Jim started up the grill. Aunt Lizzy was inside working on the apple pie and keeping an eye on Devon’s mother, who was able to leave her nursing room for the holiday weekend. Devon had talked to her as much as she could this morning, but it was clear there was still enough fog in her mother’s memory to keep her from recognizing Devon as her daughter. She was avoiding talking to her more. It stung. But she’d bring her out for the fireworks, she knew.
“When are the rest of your cousins coming?” Abigail asked.
“Any second, I think.” Devon stood up. “Uncle Jim, are Rudy and Jordy still on their way?”
He nodded with an affirmative grunt. “I wouldn’t have started cooking if they weren’t.”
“Great!”
Suddenly, muffled snickers from the cornhole game, followed by Deborah smacking Jackson’s arm and hushing at him to shut up. “You started it!” he protested, causing her to smack him again.
“Are ya takin’ it easy over there?” Devon asked, folding his arms.
“Yeah, yeah, fine enough,” Jackson muttered. “Just, y’know...” He trailed off with a vague gesture, implying that Devon did, indeed, know what he was referring to.
“Uh, nah.” Devon cocked an eyebrow at Jackson. “What is it?”
Deborah cut in for him, leaning over his shoulder. “So Jordy’s bringing her boyfriend—”
“I had a feeling,” Abigail muttered, just loud enough for her comment to be heard. It had certainly been a shock to everyone when Jordan’s boyfriend had been revealed to be William Murderface. There had been few signs that William had even liked women to begin with, and, admittedly, Devon had assumed that her dating William had just been another in a long line of rebellious acts directed toward her father. Still, they seemed not only fit for each other, but William and Uncle Jim had gotten along surprisingly well.
Devon shrugged at this. Though she and Abigail had extremely complicated feelings towards Dethklok at this point, they would deal with it so long as Jordan was happy. “I would expect so. That’d be like asking Rudy not to bring her kids.”
“Yeah, it’s that.” Deborah laughed. “Rudy’s got a boyfriend, too.”
Even Uncle Jim turned at this. It seemed as though Rudy had kept that a secret from everyone. “She, what?”
“Ah, I’m with Uncle Jim here. How come he didn’t know, of all people, and you did?”
“Jet told me when I had to pick the kids up from school the other day. And Delta yelled at him not to talk about his mother’s secrets, so that just confirmed it.”
“So, he’s coming over?” Though surprised and a bit hurt at the secrets, Devon was thrilled at the prospect of getting to meet the newest man in Rudy’s life.
“Uh. Yeah.” Deborah started laughing again, covering her mouth.
“Okay, what’s all this about, huh?”
Deborah shook her head. “You’re not gonna like him.”
“Oh, c’mon. Course I will.”
“Nah, Deb’s right,” Jackson chimed in. “You’re gonna hate him.”
“I’m gonna hate him?” They were incredulous. “Jordan’s dating William Murderface, and you think I’m gonna hate whatever boy Rudy brings home?”
“Easy!”
Devon gave a suspicious glance to Ricky. “Do you know who they’re talking about?”
“Don’t bring me into this.”
“Ricky.”
“Yeah.” He grimaced, rubbing the back of his neck. “Yeah, you’re not gonna be happy.”
Too confused to even parse through this, the fence door swung open, allowing for the Nguyen-Croziers to finally arrive. First was Rudy, carrying in a bowl for the potluck as Jet ran past her towards the inflatable water slide that Ricky and Devon had set up. Delta followed her mom, who started to greet her family with hugs, and Jordan and William followed in at last, Jordan’s arms full of plastic cups and William holding a single bottle of beer (already unopened).
“Hi, I missed you guys,” Devon said, hugging Rudy close. “It’s been so long.”
“I know, I’ve been busy.” She set her bowl on the table upon being released from the hug, which Devon could see now was filled with potato salad.
“So I hear.”
Deborah and Jackson loudly cleared their throats behind them. “So...,” Deborah purred upon catching Rudy’s attention.
“Where is he?” Jackson asked, his voice in an equally knowing lilt, perfectly matching his sister’s.
Rudy’s face turned bright red and her mouth fell open. “Who told you?” she hissed, already not denying anything.
“Your kids.”
“My—?” Rudy let out an exasperated breath. “Okay. Yes, fine. He’s...a bit late. He wanted to bring something, make a good impression.”
“Aw, now that’s sweet.” Devon elbowed Rudy playfully. “Those two chucklefucks,” they said, pointing at Deborah and Jackson, “seemed to believe I would hate your boyfriend.”
Rudy avoided eye contact, fiddling with the ends of her hair. “You, uh, don’t know who he is?”
“Nah. Why, should I?”
“Um... Jet, don’t take food into the water!” Seemingly blessed by her son’s behavior, Rudy could run off and deal with him, leaving Devon feeling even more in the dark.
As the afternoon went on, Devon did her best to prod at Rudy and her cousins for more information. Rudy somehow always found a way to avoid the question, Deborah and Jackson infuriatingly only continued to laugh, Delta was too busy with her younger brother to get any information from, and when Devon finally asked Jordan, she ominously replied with, “Everything bad you thought would happen when I brought William home is going to happen tonight.” Devon was undeterred, though, not willing to completely write off Rudy’s newest love interest. Was he a drifter? Devon had been. Military? Then he’d fit right in to a nearly completely Military family. Felon? Devon had killed people, and it wasn’t like the US Military were clean, either.
When the fence door finally opened again, it seemed as though the entire backyard was holding its breath as Rudy’s boyfriend walked in.
He was tall, large, had long black hair, and was holding a bouquet of roses to obscure his face. But when he spoke, every nerve in Devon’s body seized.
“Hey, uh, Rudy? I’m not exactly sure who I’m supposed to give these to,” said Nathan Explosion.
Deborah and Jackson burst into laughter, Rudy rushed over to help him with the flowers, and Abigail put her hand reassuringly on Devon’s shoulder. “This is gonna be a long night, isn’t it?”
Devon’s mouth turned sour. “Baby, I need tequila, and I need you to make him cry during cornhole.”
“That, I can do.”
“Atta girl,” they said, kissing her on the cheek.
Devon’s uncle sighed, turning back to the grill. “I’m starting to regret giving up on killing that band.”