Would these evaluations ever stop putting him outside of his comfort zone? He sincerely doubted it. But then again, that was probably exactly what they were for. Hopefully the anxiety that came along with it would become less in time, but for now he simply had to suck it up and get it over and done with as best possible. At first he had been terrified. A Capella meant he had to sing again right? He supposed it was only part of being a trainee, but Jinwoo firmly believed that he was far beyond salvation when it came to singing and that he would probably never be able to learn.
Fortunately Jinwoo had come to find that there were a lot of very good and helpful people at his company and that everyone were pretty much in the same boat most of the time. Some evaluations fit better to some people than others, that was for sure, but it wasn’t hard to band together and try to get things sorted out in a group. It was nice he had to admit. Plus Joshua was a person he felt comfortable with, and the other had assured him that they would try their best to find some way to implement rapping into their performance instead. He still couldn’t help but crack a smile at the older boy as they were sitting at lunch break. “Hey, at least you don’t have to dance this time. That’s pretty nice for you isn’t it?”
Song: Whistle by BLACKPINK ;; Acapella version by SoulstaR
With @rkshua @rkxminah & @rkleedongminie || Line distribution
In hindsight he supposed it was kind of funny. That the small singing line he had in this song harmonising with everyone else wasn’t what had caused him the most stress for once, but rather what would have appeared to be a very innocent whistling melody in the very beginning. At least Jinwoo could whistle, but he had never once imagined how hard it was to produce a small melody with this skill. No big deal he had thought at first, but eventually it had proven a much bigger hurdle than first anticipated.
At the time it had caused him a lot of stress as he wanted to do perfectly for once, to not let down his group mates, but now it seemed almost laughable that such a puny matter could cause such an amount of conflict. If he told Joshua about it, surely it would become another laughing matter between the two, but for now the hours he had spent alone at home after practice driving Chewie nuts with the repetitive whistling was his little secret. Maybe it could become a fun little memory eventually.
Admittedly the fact that he had to start the song was nerve wracking. But while this evaluation had made him very nervous eventually, both Minah and Joshua had done their best to incorporate a rap into the acapella version they had eventually decided upon, a thing that was probably weird for the genre, but in this area where Jinwoo had to be in focus himself and couldn’t just hide behind others or through a melodic rap, he had practically felt his spirit leave his body at the thought. And admittedly he wanted to salvage his image a bit towards the youngest of the group as it had been kind of a jab on his pride to have to ask for singing lessons from someone younger. But if he wasn’t ever evolving, what was the point of even trying his way around this industry? He couldn’t get anywhere if the only thing he knew how to do was dance. This evaluation proved that much very well.
Now was the time to do or die, and although it was a lot less intimidating to sit before a few individuals rather than last month’s crowd, he found there was just something nerve wrecking about the evaluations no matter what the situation was. Even if he was allowed to only dance, he doubted it would be any easier, for the memory of his audition was still fresh in mind now three months later. Had it already been three months? That was wild to think about. Perhaps it would become easier in time, perhaps not, but for now he just had to take it one day at a time, and in the silence of the room that didn’t play any backup music for their performance, Jinwoo initiated the song with the whistle he had practiced to perfection.
Hearing the others harmonise without him made him feel relief -- no matter how bad he himself was at it, he had three capable singers by his side who would definitely be able to pull up this performance, and for that he was happy. Letting his body ease up from the anxiety, he started moving along to the others’ voices, the dancer in him finding it impossible to sit still when music filled the room -- even if it was simple song there was still a rhythm to be found and that was enough. Then his rap part came up and perhaps because he was just so relieved that it wasn’t a singing part, for once he didn’t feel nervous about having to rap in front of others.
Every guy checks me out every day
They all think they can get me
I don’t want a lot of things
I want your heart
Cut out your heart and show me
Confidently, sometimes chic, chic
The song itself fit into Jinwoo’s taste in music, and although he didn’t know it by heart, he had heard it a couple of times before. The original had a cool beat that would have been great to dance to, but he had to admit that it felt slightly weird rapping a female part if only lyrics wise. The rap itself was pretty straightforward and fortunately already in a deeper female key so it hadn’t been too hard to make it fit to his own key of voice. Immediately afterwards Joshua took over, bringing the melody back to song, soon followed by Dongmin and a short part by Minah before all of them had to sing together. Jinwoo took extra caution to make sure his voice was smaller than the rest of them so he wouldn’t be heard if he messed up.
(My heart is) beating so fast
You can hear it closer and closer
Being a rapper had proven difficult so far, but this time Jinwoo was just glad that his group had tried to be mindful of it. He knew he couldn’t keep on going with special treatment, and he didn’t hold Aron and Johnny in spite for a moment for having made him sing last month (after all Kris had been in the exact same position as him so he had no right to complain about anything) but this was much more comfortable for him. Hearing the rest of his group near the end of their song, Jinwoo prepared himself to yet again let his voice simply be a barely noticeable background sound as they reached the climax and the final lines of the song.
Make’ em whistle like
A missile bomb, bomb
Every time I show up, blow up uh
Make’ em whistle like
A missile bomb, bomb
Every time I show up, blow up
Thus their performance was done, and after a moment of not breathing, Jinwoo let out a sharp exhale of relief. He hadn’t messed up. Not this time. At least not noticeably. The teachers would probably find something to comment on anyway, but the redhead himself believed that this had actually been a performance he could be satisfied with. He quickly bowed his head to the rest of his group members in thanks.
