TL;DR, RK laments about being a trans man and his latest adventures in trying to figure out the person who was actually just an awful person to him
On my shit but I continue to be pissed off because of how often people around me will talk about ‘all men suck’ ‘all men are evil’ ‘all men are bad’ when it’s literally the person who manipulated me for years or when I try and be like ‘no I do love men’ they’ll be like but men are so GROOOSSSS!!!! Ewww don’t say that bc I have trauma w men so even tho I talk about hating you, hating masculinity and hating anything like that you CANT talk about the fact you find men attractive in PASSING even though you talk about WLW/WLNB sex all the time, unprompted and refuse to let the topic change when people try to change it cause it’s UNCOMFORTABLE to hear about your sexual escapades while the rest of us say ‘more mouse bites’
ok this bitch gonna get long
But like. There’s ZERO need to tell a cishet woman that oh you’ll be a lesbian or at least bi one day bc men suck so bad or be like EWW SHUT UP WOMEN BETTER STOP TALKING. When me and another men loving person say ‘oh yeah I find this attractive’/‘oh em gee men!’ To each other in a conversation YOU ARE NOT A PART OF?? I used to think it was nice to hear ‘oh ur the only man I trust’ from them but now it just feels like ‘oh! I don’t REALLY see you as a man!’ I’ve just been so pissed at How much my friend grøup demonizes masculinity I don’t think there’s a single cis or trans man in my close group which just ends up sucking on my part cause it’s like yeah. I’m really not allowed to be like man I wish I didn’t have this or even try to MENTION ‘hey when you talk about kill all men it does kinda hurt because I know in my head you don’t mean me but also in my heart it just makes me feel like you don’t think I’m a man at all / you wish I was dead’ like. Just there a lot of things that I’m so stressed about that I’m just not allowed to talk about with anyone but a wall because no one around me cares in a way, not at the level of Im experiencing it right now and I am afraid sorta care. Oh also I don’t think it’s cool to feminize me ! Randomly! Or comment on my body randomly unless asked or in a relationship I guess . There’s a lot of things I realize maybe weren’t pawesome .
