#rob needs a hug

[darkbloomart2727]

Listen everyone talks about mhairi after the dive

But

WHAT ABOUT ROB!!

WHO HAD TO SWIM back to the bell unsure if she would be still breathing by the time he got there,

WHAT ABOUT HIM!!!!!

Rob who didn’t know if she would come out of the wreckage of the Beira, alive,

Rob who knew she was low on oxygen

Rob who possibly had PTSD after the dive

[darkbloomart2727]

This ending of siren’s rest makes me feel ill

Especially when you realise, Rob had found her floating there and possibly didn’t know she were breathing.

This game makes me physically ill I can’t cope

It does also make me wonder that if Mhairi lost oxygen—because the gauge was red, how Rob managed to figure she was alive unless her saying “Da” was his like breath of relief and he actually thought she were dead before she came back.

If he thought she were dead the moment he found her, I’m gonna be ill 😭 My man didn’t deserve to go through all this

He’s so innocent look at him

Again if he thought she were dead when he found her, please he needs a hug—the mental torture he must have gone through while in decompression but also relief that she were alive.

[darkbloomart2727]

(14th May 1987)

Rob didn’t know how long it had being, since he heard those 2 words from the doctor ‘I’m sorry’ and the image of seeing Aggie stood there red eyes, clearly about to collapse from shock, Ruiri had taken Aggie out of the hospital for some fresh air, she needed it—Rob looked down at the little bundle snuggled against his bare chest, the doctors had proposed Skin-to-skin considering Mhairi wasn’t there, it had taken little one ages to settle against Rob due to not recognising his heartbeat, Aggie had clearly being agitated because she were unable to do anything.

Little one shifted a bit against Rob, he brushed his finger on her dark skinned cheek, she had her mothers freckles and that’s what made his heart ache,she was gonna look like her mother…he could feel it.

“Sìth, sìth, tha e ceart gu leòr, a bhig, tha uncail Rob gad ghiùlan,” > shhh shh it’s okay little one, uncle rob’s got you>

Ruiri soon walked into the room with Aggie, who took her coat off, she looked worn out—exhausted, her braid was more messy, it had clearly being a hard 7 hours, Ruiri put his hand on her shoulder

“Faigh cadal, tha sinn air a faighinn,” > get some sleep we’re got her> Ruiri tells her

“Me and Mhairi didn’t even pick a name Ru—I feel helpless,” Agnetha said

“Tha thu sgìth, mar sin mas e ur toil e; bidh mise agus Ruaraidh a' dèiligeadh rithe,” >your worn out, so please,me and Ruiri will deal with her> Rob told her.

“Okay—thank you both, you two pick the name—I can’t bring myself too,” Aggie said

“Aggie sin gu tur ceart gu leòr, falbh agus gabh fois,” > Aggie that’s completely fine, go rest> Ruiri exclaimed.

With that Aggie nodded and left the room, possibly going to sleep in Mhairi’s yellow Volkswagen Beetle that were still parked in the parking lot, waiting for its owner to return…

Ruiri walked over and sat down—after dragging a chair over, little one turned her head ever so slightly to try and look at the new face.

“Halò, is mise d’uncail Ruaraidh,” >hi I’m your uncle Ruiri>

“Tha bòcan Mhairi oirre,” >she has Mhairi’s freckles> Rob says wiping his eyes

Ruiri stood up and hugged his boyfriend, who cried into his hoodie “Tha bòcan Mhairi oirre,” >she has Mhairi’s freckles>

“Tha fhios agam… tha fhios agam.” >I know..I know>

It had been hours since they were told the news, Rob had being dreading…so so much, ‘I’m sorry’

“Tha fhios agad, tha Mali a’ freagairt oirre,” > you know, Mali suits her>

“Aye,” Rob let out still wiping his tears on Ruiri’s hoodie, they both looked down at the little bundle, asleep against Rob’s chest.

Ruiri belongs too: @theplasticpeoples

This technically hasn’t happened yet, I just waited to write this

[darkbloomart2727]

Guilt

The sea was quiet now. Too quiet.

Rob pulled himself into the dive bell with Mhairi’s body in his arms, every motion clumsy with exhaustion and dread. The hatch slammed shut behind him, sealing them in. The hiss of air pressurizing filled the space like a death rattle.

She slumped against the steel wall, helmet tilted, mask fogged and lifeless. The cramped chamber left no distance between them. No escape from the sight of her.

Rob backed against the opposite wall, helmet knocking the steel, breath loud and uneven in his own ears. The bell was meant to be salvation, but it felt like a coffin lowered into the abyss. One body already dead, one still breathing who wished he wasn’t.

The radio crackled. “Rob, you secured in?” Hans’s voice, steady, professional.

Rob swallowed hard, fingers twitching. “Aye. I’ve got her in here with me.” His voice broke on the last words.

Silence. Then the winch above groaned, the cable pulling them upward. The bell shuddered with the motion, a metal coffin rising slow through the black.

Rob’s eyes locked on Mhairi. Every bump of the ascent made her shift slightly, her helmet tapping the wall, limp as a rag doll. He wanted to look away, but couldn’t.

“You did what you could,” Hans said, voice softer now, cutting through the static. “It wasn’t your fault.”

Rob pressed a gloved hand against his visor, trembling. “I let her drown in my arms, Hans. She trusted me. And I couldn’t—” His voice cracked, swallowed by a ragged sob. “I should’ve—”

“You’d both be gone if you stayed. You got her this far. You brought her back. That matters.”

But the words bounced hollow off the steel. The bell was shrinking, the air thick, every breath harder to draw. He couldn’t stop staring at her. At the water droplets clinging to her hair, her mask, her suit. At how utterly still she was.

The guilt pressed tighter than the sea ever had.

He imagined the ocean still clawing at them, imagined the black water pouring in through invisible seams, flooding the chamber until they both lay side by side, indistinguishable. A part of him wanted it. To let the North Sea finish what it had started. To let the silence claim him too.

Hans’s voice crackled again. “Hold on, lad. You’ll be topside soon.”

Rob choked on a bitter laugh. “Topside with what, Hans? A body?” He glanced back at her, at the way her hand hung limp in the low light. His chest tightened. “She’s all that’s left of this place. And I’m the bastard who lived.”

The bell creaked as it climbed, but Rob felt no lighter. Only heavier.

He leaned forward, resting his helmet against her shoulder, metal on metal. His breath fogged the visor, smearing the last thing he could see of her.

The North Sea hadn’t just drowned Mhairi. It had drowned him too—just slower.

⸻

BOO ANGST