Hetalia Incorrect Quotes Part 7/? RIP Lithuania's sanity (long)
Hi! This is just a Lithuania/Jazz Trio appreciation post. Link to part 6
America: [draws a line on a piece of paper] Is that straight? [tilts paper up] No it isn’t. God, that’s even less straight than I am.
Romano: Are you gay or do you have scoliosis?
Lithuania: Probably both.
America *holds the door open for Romano*: After you.
Romano: No, after you.
America: I insist, after you.
Lithuania *pushes past both with a look of annoyance and through the doorway*: After me!
Romano: [Hoarsely] I’m losing my voice.
America: Haha, guess that means you can’t yell at us anymore.
[Later]
America: Turns out, Giac is scarier when he’s quiet.
Lithuania: *facepalms*
America: You’re so polite!
Lithuania: Thank you, I have anxiety.
America: I wasn’t injured. I was lightly stabbed.
Lithuania: I’m sorry. You were stabbed?
America: Only lightly stabbed. I didn’t want to frighten you.
America: I accidentally ate Giacomo's pasta. How long do you think I’ll live?
Lithuania: Ten
America: Ten what?
Lithuania: Nine
Romano: What happened?
America: Well, remember when you guys told me not to burn down the house?
Romano: You burned down the house?
America: No! I had the fire put out almost right away! This is a success story!
Lithuania: *screaming* MY ROOM!
Romano: *glares*
America: Uhm, about that-
Lithuania: Why would you give a knife to Giac?
America: He felt unsafe
Lithuania: Now I feel unsafe.
America: I’m sorry.
America: Would you like a knife?
Lithuania: I want to be a caterpillar
Romano: Explain.
Lithuania: Eat a lot, sleep for a while, wake up beautiful.
Romano: You know that they have a lifespan of like 2 weeks right?
Lithuania: That’s another highlight.
America: TOLYS NO!
Lithuania: I’m going to sing a song for you all. It’s called “My Life So Far”. *inhales and plays a chord”. *SCREEAAMSS*
Lithuania: I just slept 7 hours, which is twice as long as I usually sleep, so I’m a little disoriented.
Lithuania: I’m good.
Lithuania: I haven’t slept in a solid 83 hours, but I’m good.
Romano, screeching in horror from a distance: SLEEP CHILD!
Romano: Good night bastards.
America: Sleep tight!
Lithuania: Don’t let the bedbugs crawl into your ears and whisper threatening things that make you question yourself.
America: Tolys, what the hell?
America: Truth or dare.
Lithuania: Truth.
America: How many hours have you slept this week?
Lithuania: …Dare.
America: I dare you to go to sleep.
Lithuania: …I don’t like this game
Romano: Girls are hot.
Romano: But guys are hot too!
Romano: WHY ARE THEY BOTH SO HOT?!
Lithuania, nodding grimly: Global Warming.
America: Today I saw Tolys crying for 5-6 minutes and then an alarm went off and he just...stopped crying and went right back to work???
Lithuania: It’s called time management, Alfred.
America: *Puts his hands over Lithuania's eyes* Guess who!
Lithuania: It's either my boyfriend or the cold clammy hands of death.
America: It's me!
Lithuania: Damn it.
America: What in life do you relate to most?
Romano: Blenders.
America: Why-
Romano: Because I also scream while doing my job.
America: There is only one thing worse than dying... *he tears off paper to reveal ‘Tolys dying’*
Lithuania, nodding: Myself.
America: No!
America: …Almost....got it....
Lithuania: You've been trying to open that jar for nearly 2 hours.
Romano: See, tall people aren't stronger. They just keep trying longer than any sane person would.
America: Did you notice how hot your brother has gotten?
Romano: *Glares.*
America: I'm joking, don't worry.
America: I accidentally poisoned one of our glasses and can't remember which one.
Lithuania:
Romano:
Lithuania: From the way this dinner is going I hope it's mine.
Lithuania: Gentle reminder, don’t drink too much coffee before setting down to sleep.
America: I do what I want.
Lithuania: This was meant to be a gentle reminder, Alfred, but your defiance makes me want to wrap a chair around your thick skull.
Lithuania: Did you HAVE to shoot him
Romano: You weren't there, you didn't hear what he said
America: What did he say?
Romano: "What are you gonna do? Shoot me?"
Lithuania: ……
America: That's fair
Lithuania: It costs $100 to see a therapist. However it costs $0 to tell myself "it be like that sometimes"
A very concerned Romano: Tolys, no.
