Imagine with me, if you will,
A woman and her husband. Royalty lines the blood of the man but she was nothing but an aristocrat married for fame and wealth. They are married, it is not always happy, but it is love. Sort of. The forced kind that is okay at best but you both know it isn't the fullest.
The man is not cruel nor unjust, and when he is crowned king his reign does not incite the need for rebellion. She is a loyal queen and she does not rule unequally. Her reign is equal to his. They are equals.
One day, years after their marriage and crowning, the man asks the woman. "My wife, for years, we have been trying to bear a child! Why has this not happened yet?"
And the wife replied, "I do not know, we shall call the doctor and see."
And so the doctor came and delivered the bad news. The woman was infertile.
Infertile woman were not woman in the eyes of others, especially men. And this man's eyes grew cruel and cold. They only had a sort of love, after all. It was something easily broken and replaced.
He took our his rage upon his land and his wife, he drank and he beat her and neglected his duties. Secretly she stole away to do the work he didn't do. Their rule was no longer equal. In secret she did most of the work, in public he was the king no one wanted but did not want to rebel against.
The wife had known the man did not love her and she knew she did not love him. It was a sort of love.
They dissolved into fights everyday and every night and their words rang out through the halls of the castle. Followed by the sounds of a merciless beating.
The wife did not lost spirit despite her pain, she did not lose her resolve. Everyday the fight would repeat.
"You cannot bear my children!" He would scream, and he'd point at her in rage, accusing and disgusted.
"I did not make that choice!" She would cry out back, eyes glaring a cold. Steadfast in truth while his wavered in a lie.
"Yes you did!" He would scream back, and then he would take her and he would beat her. And she would bruise and no one dared mention what they knew of the King's bastardly acts.
And one night, when she had enough, she finally replied. "If you want a child so bad, go lay with another woman and make your own!"
She had not meant it. He knew this. They had a sort of love. Enough for them to be loyal to one another. Enough for them to care.
But his sort of love was overshadowed by his rage and disgust of the woman, and the next night he stole away to lay with another woman.
She caught them in their bed.
"You cheater!" She had screamed, horror and betrayal flush across her face and sparking in her eyes. "You lying bastard!"
But alas the damage was done and in a few weeks time the woman he'd lain with was pregnant with royal child. But he did not want to cause scandal, so he hid her away and pretended he's bested the infertility of his wife.
The wife hated the man and his despicable actions. How dare he? But she was not strong enough to beat him back or do the things she wished.
So she stayed quiet and waited.
But alas one night, while she slept in a room separate of the cheating king, the second woman crept into her room. And shook her awake.
"My Queen ," she had whispered softly, "My queen."
And the queen awoke to the woman. "What do you want?"
"My queen, I simply wish you would tell me, how do I please the king? He grows angry each day, and tells me more of how he hopes to hurt me."
The queen wanted to be angry, but she saw the terror in the woman's eyes. She held her hands and looked her in the eyes. "You are safe for now," she promised, "your pregnancy will protect you, and now, so will I."
And the woman thanked her, and told the queen she was merciful.
But the queen had found that she did not want to live like this. In fear and in secret. But she knew now was not the time to change.
And from then on each night the woman would sneak in and wake the queen and ask her questions of her day and how she is feeling. She never dared approach during the day with the shadow of the angry king cast upon them.
And each night the Queen found she enjoyed the woman's company, for the woman listened to her and knew her better then any man she'd known or her husband. And she looked forward to their nights together where they would talk and chat while the moonlight painted their faces and brought the shadows of the room to life.
When the baby began to kick, the woman took the Queens hand and gently laid it upon her skin, and there she felt the bumps of a small life kicking and growing and the queen had never known she could feel such love for something not even born yet. She said so quietly she hoped the woman would not hear.
And the woman responded, "I love you."
And the queen looked back in shock, for she'd never known that woman could say such things to each other in the way she knew she meant. But she found that she also loved the woman, and there was no one she would rather be with then the the woman and her child. So she said, "I love you too."
And they kissed there in the dead of night, sitting on the bed while moonlight washed their faces in shades of blue. And the room was dark everywhere else and the shadows marked their secret love, born of nothing but love. And they felt lust, for they were not blind, but they felt love before it.
And then they did not stop kissing, and each night their secret meetings were marked with kissing and little "I love yous" scattered with baby kicks and conversation.
And then one day the baby was born. And suddenly the woman did not come to meet the queen, and the queen did not know where she could be so she stood and she searched through the halls, and she found the man beating her.
And she threw herself in front of the woman and let herself be beaten because she had always been able to hold her ground against the man. And the woman left crying to throw herself onto the Queens bed where she fell asleep to her scent.
The queen returned hours later, buried in bruises and with a hard determination. For she had seen the king beat her love and she had decided that she would take action soon. So she told the woman, "do not go to the king. Every night, come to my room and I will take his beatings, for I have a plan."
And the woman did not agree easily, but the queen wore her down with reassurance and her plan. And they kissed and slept and the woman left before she could be found.
And every night for the next few months the queen would take the beating and the woman would hide in her room, and every day they would visit the child together in secret to coo. And the Queen said, proudly one day.
"The kings blood may run in this child's veins, but they are yours and my child. They may be related by blood to the king, but he will never be their father."
And then one day, and no one is sure how, the king was found dead in his bed. The doctors could not find the reasoning, and the queen did not attend the funeral. Instead she stayed in her castle and watched the masses of black crowd to the casket as thought they truly mourned for the king.
And then she ruled fairly and gained her followers support. And she gained her citizens love and she was fair and just and good. Loving and kind and merciful, and then one day she hosted a party and she asked her love to marry her.
And the citizens had never seen such an act between two woman before, but they loved their queen and they found they could not say it was wrong when they witnessed the joy and love in their eyes at the "I will!" That replied. So they attended the wedding and watch the queen and her love, marry.
And the kingdom had two queens and one heir, and no one ever questioned the kings death because they found their queens were far better then any king nor queen they'd had before.
And in secret the Queens layed together on the bed and discovered pleasures under the sheets, and the queen who killed her husband whispered in secret of how she did it.
And in the moonlight bathing them in blue they slept, both queens and in love with each other as wholly as one can love.