a/n: severely out of practice but i had this thought a few days ago and wanted to share lol
underground boxer!jongseob that shows up, every time without fail, to your doorstep after particularly bad fights. he knows he’s going to have to go through the pain of seeing you cry all over again, all because he can’t will himself to stop whatever this is.
it’s gotten to the point where you stay up later than usual on the weekends, already anticipating the blonde boy and his quiet knocks at your door. no matter how much you hate him for doing this, hate that he willingly puts himself in danger for the chance at some fast cash, you’ve never been able to ignore him, never have had the courage to leave him to stand outside your apartment until he eventually kicks rocks. you know with how stubborn he is, he’d probably stay ‘til morning, would fall asleep with his head flat against your welcome mat.
tonight, he’s got cuts along the bridge of his nose, with blood crusting up along their edges. his knuckles sport angry shades of purples and yellows, bottom lip split, and his head hangs low in shame as he sits atop the all-too-familiar bathroom countertop you’ve led him to. maybe he’s embarrassed of himself and how he seems to constantly take from you, how he knows the hurt he causes with every impromptu visit to your home, but won’t stop just for your sake. the damned cycle continues, and neither of you can do anything to stop it.
expectedly, some tears do fall as you patch his wounds, fix him just so he can go out and break himself all over again. he stares at you with unspoken words, the word “love” threatening to tumble out from his tongue, even if he knows it’s unfair. you don’t deserve to be loved like this, but you’d let him do it anyways, meet him in the middle even if it meant abandoning your own worth. jongseob is well aware of this, and it kills him that he can’t, no, won’t be enough for you. but “not enough” doesn’t stop you from planting wet kisses along his jaw once you’ve successfully cleaned him up. it doesn’t stop him from grabbing at your face and kissing you like he really means it, like he isn’t going to be gone come morning time. the cycle is in full swing, and somehow, once again, you’ve ended up being led towards your bed by the dangerous boy. the way jongseob undresses you so sweetly does nothing but make you sick, but you don’t want to stop him, though you know you should. maybe you both are similar in that way, too selfish, too irresponsible.
your thoughts on this, on anything really, don’t linger too much, not when he descends between your legs to savor your cunt like it’s his last meal. at this rate, one of these days it very well may be.
and when he’s worked out as many orgasms out of you as he can, some with his sinful mouth, and some with his cock, he wraps his sweaty arms around you so tight that any outsider would believe you are the one who’s always prone to pulling away. you fall asleep just like that, back against his chest, goosebumps dancing on top of your bare flushed skin, his breath hot against your neck as he contemplates what to say, what he can say to remedy all of this. and like clockwork, no words come.
© kisseobie, please do not repost my writing!
