theory and practice
a teasing conversation ensues when you boldly suggest becoming rossi’s fourth wife.
pairing: dave rossi x reader warnings: fem!reader, flirty reader, flirty rossi, power dynamics perhaps? rossi thinking of moral complexities of a relationship etc etc, probably an age gap? it's not explicitly mentioned but home boy is old as dirt prompt: here wc: 0.6k
Rossi tries to focus on the article in front of him, but he can practically feel your eyes burning holes in his cheek. He almost snorts. You’re not even subtle about it. He wonders idly, if you’ve blinked yet.
“You know, if you stare any harder, you’re going to hurt yourself, bella. What exactly do you need from me?”
You tip your floppy head back slightly, resting your chin on your hand and giving him a blatantly flirtatious once-over. “Tell me honestly. Do I have what it takes to be Mrs. Rossi number four, or should I keep working on it?”
At this point, Rossi doesn’t even blink. You’ve made it somewhat of your personal mission to charm him into an early grave ever since day one at the BAU. Your methods are disarmingly cunning, subtle enough to pass unnoticed by less discerning observers, yet transparent to him in their seductive intent.
There was that memorably orchestrated coffee delivery, leaning forward with an excessive grace, making sure his peripheral vision had an unobstructed view down your blouse. Or the occasion you casually suggested a shared hotel room on a stakeout, ostensibly to save departmental funds.
Honestly, your relentless pursuit of his accelerated cardiovascular decline would almost be flattering, if it weren’t so damn effective.
Rossi gives you a slow, contemplative look, barely masking the amusement tugging at his lips. “Well, I have to warn you it’s a notoriously rigorous screening process. Think multiple rounds of very thorough interviews, background checks, and extensive compatibility testing. You might want to clear your schedule.”
Adjusting your position to sit up straighter, your arms press your chest together, the angle leaving little to his imagination. Rossi’s eyes are thankfully hidden, but he knows you know what he’s looking at.
“I’m fully committed, Rossi. Hit me with your best shot. I promise, I can handle it.”
Rossi snorts softly, folding his newspaper and setting it aside. The sports section can wait, something he rarely admits, but this is far more interesting.
He gives you his undivided attention, leaning back comfortably.
“Alright. First question. Exactly how many FBI dress-code violations do you intend to commit on a daily basis?”
“Well, how many does it take before you feel obligated to reprimand me personally? I’ll aim for one more than that.”
He exhales slowly. “Ambitious, aren’t we?”
“You have no idea. But feel free to find out.” Your grin widens as you trail a fingertip casually along the rim of your sunglasses. “I’m even more ambitious up close.”
He allows himself a momentary consideration of the tantalizing hypothetical you’ve so generously presented. He wonders how you’d truly respond if, just once, he abandoned his better judgment and actually called your bluff.
You’re lucky, really, that he’s a man who still maintains a stubborn adherence to decency. That years spent navigating the ethical complexities of this job have given him ample reason to value his own carefully upheld morals.
Without said deeply embedded moral compass, however, he’s rather certain neither one of you would emerge unscathed.
“As enticing as I find your enthusiasm, perhaps its best to keep your ambitions strictly theoretical. For now.”
Rossi barely has time to appreciate the fluid grace with which you rise from your lounge chair before you lean in close, eyes level with his own. His breath stills subtly as your lips touch his cheek.
“Every great idea begins as just a theory,” you say. “Remember that.”
He watches with reluctant open approval as you walk back toward the house. Settling back into his chair, Rossi resigns himself to the knowledge that his professional and personal resolve will continue to be rigorously tested.
Perhaps retirement would have been a safer choice. Still, he allows himself a moment of indulgent appreciation as you disappear inside. After all, even the strongest moral fortitude deserves a brief lapse into harmless admiration now and again.
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