#routine misc

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GPOY

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GPOY : My backpack

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Ha! EMS is really fast ...

Despite the weekend, the parcel was delivered very fast ..........

Cooooooooooool!

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A person like me #7

I have several tumblr neighbors who are happy to listen to my stupid life story.

But I don't want them to worry how to comfort me when I talk these stories personally.

So today, I decided to talk here one more 'A person like me' story.

So you don’t have to worry what to say to me. :)

I appreciate much about just listening to my story.

I was born as an unwanted child. In other words, I was in the uncomfortable situation from the birth.

And I had to spend very much painful time because of families who hated me so much while I lived at my father's half brother’s house.

I looked as if I live a normal life but I was never welcomed from the family.

It is very difficult to explain how cruel and painful to live there. A person like me 4

However, fortunately, I was quite good at self-control so I endured all the shitty situations.

And eventually, my father's half brother even said that he wants to see me being angry and shout.

I always tried to be perfect to be accepted from the family and that put me in even more difficult situation as my father's half brother's wife thought I was pushing her daughter, to the edge. A person like me 3

She rather thought about me an arrogant person.

However, in reality, I used to cry alone almost every night because of psychological pain.

I now think it is unbelievable how I endured that life.

It is embarrassing but I feel like crying at night even these days.

Fortunately, no one knows ... now ... except you guys ...........

Wait ... what? ... no ......... I'm not a werewolf. (-_-) Speechless!

Anyway ...

So I always wait for the morning and the sun.

I feel very calm when the sun is up in the sky.

That is why I have a stupid habit of waiting whole night for the sun and get to bed in the morning.

Okay, okay ... I'm a vampire. Happy now?

(-.-) What? ...... um ... ye..ah ... I think I can add some bite marks to your neck ...

Anyway ...

Also, I am not so used to be with other people because I'm more used to be hated by others. (I mean, my family.)

I feel uncomfortable if somebody wants to be close personally and be friend.

That is one of the reasons why I don't meet people privately.

What? ... Yeah ... I ..... I ... like the forever alone guy ......

Well ... 

I'm this kind of stupid person.

And I'm very socially awkward.

But in fact,

I care about you guys.

ps. Thank you for your concern. Muah! ;)

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Thank you for all your nice and kind advices.

I feel so much better now.

Thank you, thoughtful people! :D ♥

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I have a bad news.

The project I was going to take a part of(Captain Harlock) is now unclear so I have no clue what will happen to it from now on. I've heard that the production company will be changed. sad ...

Though they're likely to offer me another work (game cinematic), I don't want to do it now for several reasons. (Although one of the major reasons I studied Maya was to produce game cinematics.)

Some of you know already that there were several job offers for me in the mean time. However, I refused all of them because those jobs were not what I wanted.

(Oh yes. I almost forgot that I got a job interview from a TV commercial film company yesterday. And I refused again.)

Anyway ...

In fact, in my country, most of the 3D companies don't need particular designers like me(human figure modeler).

It's simply because there is no such kind of project here.

Now I have to confront the same problems again.

It seems like I have to choose one out of three options.

1. working for game graphic designer(need to study Max)

2. going abroad to find a suitable job I want(someone recommended me UK)

3. compromising with the reality(TV animation series for kids).

And ... I chose option 1. 

Well ...

I must say I don't feel that great today but it is not a matter of life and death so I will be fine soon.

I have been making all the decisions for myself since I was 5. because I was all alone.

I am very tired of all those situation, of making decisions by myself, but I have no choice but going through and dealing with it wisely.

Anyway, I'm alright.

I have this lovely Pillow and I know very well that it loves me much more than I'm aware of.

That's absolutely true. :D

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Thank you for all your suggestions girls! Muah~!!!

tylwyth-vila : If you have frizzy hair/ curly hair - don’t cut it too short or else it will be terrible to keep it in shape. If not, I recommend getting it layered. It keeps your head cooler and looks great. Also by cutting your hair you use less shampoo and takes a shorter time to dry. But if you are worried about hair tying then cut it shoulder length.

dairam : Cut your hair! You will look more modern.

lynai : Just put your hair up? It’ll still be hot but it’ll be away from your neck… I don’t know if it’ll help though. D:!

cosmographia : What I usually do when I want to decide if I want to cut my hair, is make either a bun or something similar that makes my hair seem shorter. Then I use that for a couple of days, and if I'm happy, I cut my hair.

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A person like me #6

I was just trying to organize my thought before I meet new people,

and that's how that story came out. :)

Contrary to what some people assume, I am literally quite all right.

I'm this kind of person.

That's all.

Anyway,

I'm still cool!

(What ... not cool?!! -_-)