#rpgchronicle

[nameless-blind-mute]

Finding purpose. Day 68

Namless sits quietly on the edge of town square hungry but hopefull for things to come. He has a purpose and a reason for being here... a reason for being alive.

But questions burn in his mind... What use is a blind warrior who can't speak? What good can he posibĺy bring to this little town of humans? It appears that they have all they need, security, food, family, friends and civil order. Even if he could find a need, how could he posibly fill it?

Nameless sits and listens to the people milling about hoping to hear a solution present itself but after weeks of begging for morsels of food the voices blend like crickets in the night, imposible to single out a solitary voice. Suddenly Namless becomes aware of something... he hears a cricket, chirping under the bench. From his months living alone in the woods and sleeping in allyways, he has found them to ba a crunchy souce of nourishment... as long as you pull off the hind feet so they dont grab hold on the way down.

Thinking only of his stomach he forgets about the people of the square and that they may not be acustomed to men hunting for food in the streets. He drops to his hands and knees and begins the hunt.  Crawling under the bench and pulling over a stone the size of a dinner plate the fat black cricket scurried away. Nameless scrambles after the tiny morsel like a cat after a mouse.

A small child stands nearby and tugs on her moms skirt and with a giggle "moma that funny elf is trying to catch a bug" the lady leans down and puts her finger to her lips "shhh don't use those words dear, its not nice." She stands up and goes about her business. The girl pulls away and says "im'ma gunna help him moma" before the lady realizes what is happening the girl runs into the square and begins crawling arround trying to help him catch his prey.

The cricket knowing he is being stalked darts from stone to stone silently as Nameless and the child scurry about. Evrytime the cricket stops, Nameless freezes in place and waits paitiently in silence untill the critter lets out a chirp. Suddenly the two leap into action clasping at the ground and turning stones.

It dosen't take long and a small crowd begins to form to watch this strange spectacle. Quietly murmering about the unusual sight, the onlookers slowly begin to laugh and chuckle. Suddenly a teenage boy begins to cheer the two on and before long evryone has joined in the spirit of the hunt. Becoming silent as a breeze when Nameless and the girl stop and laughing and cheering when they sping into action.

After what seems like an eternity Namless claims his prize to rousing applause and cheers. He picks up the little morsel and just as he is about to pop him in his mouth the little girl squeels "ew nooo dont hurt him mister!" Nameless freezes like a stone statue suddely horrifyingly aware of the crowd cheering him on... The little girl grabs his pants and pleads "i dont wanna hurt him, just wanted to catch him"

Namless is reminded of Eru as a little girl and how all her innocence was stolen by the war and how wild and terrifyd she was when he found her. He immagined what her life might have been like if her parents had not been murderd, what her father would have done with her pleading for a crickets life... slowly He kneals down and hands the girl the terrifyd creature.  The little girl smiles at him and cups the bug in her hands peeking at him throuvh the gap between her thumbs "See hes cute, hes not food silly elf man"

The crowd gasps as the child inavertantly insults the strange Sidhe... Nameless smiles and pats the head of the little girl reaches down and closes ger hands and motions to the girl that she may keep the bug. An audible sigh flows over the crowd mixed with murmers expressing a wide range of reaction.

Nameless slowly stands and gets his bearings as he makes his way back to his stick by the bench and takes a seat as the crowd dispurses. Just as he takes his seat a man approaches and places his hand on Nameless shoulder and places a loaf of bread in his lap. "I see you met my daughter, she won't let me kill anything either. You tracked a cricket in a crowd of people by only its chirp...I wonder if your any good with rats?" He places a tankard of watter in nameles hand. "Where do you live Sir Critter Catcher?"

Nameless looks about the square and raises his empty hand to the sky then shrugs his shoulders. He tears a piece of bread and dips it in the watter. "Ill be damned, if it aint a sidhe who can't talk, what on heaven did you do you to end up homeless without a tongue? No family to take care of you?" Nameless shakes his head and lowers his face to the ground in shame.

The man pauses at his reponse then pats him on the shoulder... "well if a starving man has enough kindness to give a child what could be his only meal for the day there must be some good in him" he laughs kindly "whatever has brought you here,  has brought you here I suppose, no one deserves to starve in the streets if there is an ounce of kindness in him. I own a small vineyard and I have some rats that my cats refuse catch, they have become to fat and lazy...perhapse you might have better luck. I have a shed where you can sleep and aslong as we can get rid of these pests  descretely without my little girl getting wise to us I will pay you thrice thier weight in good food"

Nameless is somewhat confused by the mans offer and shocked at his kindness but he was certainly not in any position to question the opportunity too deeply. He looks up at the kind fellow and nods in agreement, puĺls off onother piece of bread  and dips it in the cup. "Well its settled then, collect your things and meet me back here before sol reaches noon-sky and I will take you to our home. I will try and come up with a plan to keep my girl from discovering your catch... I suppose we need to call you something, can't verywell have my girl calling you Elf all the time now can we? How about... Mr.Catch"

Nameless finishes his loaf and water, ties the tankard to his belt with some string and heads off to the guards house to collect his staff... "A job, I have been given a job. A strange job... but a job all the same"

[nameless-blind-mute]

Hallows End - Day 47

--Nameless clumsily Signs to the darkness not sure if his companion is still nearby or not "I am trembling, what if I am seen as me?" (translation-im nervous, what if im recognised)"

Trust me, no one here will know.  Besides, who cares if you are recognized.  People can judge all they want.  But that is for small minds to might reduce that maybe you are like this for a reason..."  His guide shrugged.   Hmm, he heard music.  Shriek of kids playing. "Harvest time.  This human town celebrates it especially this time of year.  I want you to listen and try to find out why without asking."

Nameless nods in agreement. as he thinks to himself, (humans and a blind mute Sidhe... this will be interesting)...Following the sounds He walks allong the edge of the road towards the village No one seemed to pay him mind at first, until a couple of children said something pretty close by. "Hey mister!"  The voice of a human child.  "RAWR!"  Okay....human child making scary monster noises. "Hey mister!  You're supposed to give candy!"   "Honey, he's blind, he can't see your mask or bag." 

 An adult's voice.  "I'm sorry sir, he won't bother you aga-...."  The mother paused and looked at the blind beggar, he could sense this realization in the tension.   "You're a....Sid-..."   "Mommy!  It's an elf!  He has gems on his face!"  The child exclaimed. "Marvin!!"  The mother sounded shocked and appalled, and there was the sound of a good smack on his behind and the child shrieking a moment in shock.  "You do NOT treat people like that!"

Nameless kindly waves his hands indicating its ok, he lays his staff on the ground and kneels to allow the child to get a look at him. the signs  -- I no talk or see... you no fear me --  (his mind flashes back to the tavern on the day he found Eru a scared and wounded child terrifyd at her first sight of a sidhe)

"What's he doing mum?...."  The child blinked and looked to his mother, taking a step back. "He's trying to talk to you honey.  He forgives you for being so rude..."  His mother sighed.  "Now apologize to him..."   ".....sorry...."  Marvin fidgeted in place, looking at the blind and mute man with some apprehension.  "You want some of my candy?"

Nameless Smiles and looked up the childs Mother... and kindly shook his head no and mouthed "no, Thank you"  (suddenly distracted as he remembers the stains on his rags and the hideous sound it makes when he tries to talk - he winces as he slowly gets up picking up his staff he turns away slightly with embarrassment)

"Well, welcome to Hollow's End."  The mother says.  "Enjoy the festivities...." Hollow's End....that was a human town alright.  They were only two days walk from Compass Rose...

Nameless bows gracefully, nods and smiles to the child and gently taps the edge of the road as he continues to follow the sound of the festivities. As he walked further into town, the music was louder, and he could feel a lot more people present.  Suddenly a hand was on his shoulder, and the sound of a strong man was heard. "Hey drifter, yer not here to cause issues are you?"  Must've been a militia.

Nameless Jumps with a start, then faces the man and bows while shaking his head "No".  Holding his head low he waits for a response..."You can't join in looking like that...."  The guard grumbled and pulled on his arm to what felt like a building. "Take off that dirty cloak, by the God's sake...." Disoriented and surprised Nameless clumsily stumbles along with the man. --(I'm too filthy and ragged for human standards, Gods I am worse off than I thought)-- he thinks to himself" Hurry up!  I have to get back on patrol!  

You're lucky.  Tis the season of giving back."  The guard sighed impatiently and shuffled around, it sounded like he was getting something. He Signs to the man "Give Back?" ... The guard looks at him confused "Huh?....oh...yeah I....guess, if you really want it that bad."  He sighed and walked over as Rolynd disrobed.   AH COLD!!  As the guard ran a cold sponge over his face and chest to get most of the dirt and smell off. "Here, clean shirt, pants, and a stick to navigate around.  Beg as much as you want, this time of year, you may actually make enough to rent a room."

Nameless is confused and not quite sure what is happening as obviously his attempt to ask about the season of giving back was missed entirely, but he puts on the clothes. Knowing his attempt to ask about the season of giving back was misunderstood Nameless attempts to thank the man for his generosity. "Yeah yeah, just....go.  Don't cause trouble or I'l throw you out...."  He warned, helping him outside and giving him the long thin stick to navigate with. "Happy Hollow's Harvest."  He waved.

Feeling refreshed and renewed wearing clean clothes for the first time in over a month, Nameless could barely contain his smile. (why was this man so kind? he must have been embarrassed to have such a horrible sight in his city...)  Nameless study's what he can of his surroundings to try and remember this place so he can return the clothes and collect his staff when it is time to leave. (I must repay this man for his kindness one day he thinks to himself) After a few moments he continues down the street slowly as he gets used to this new walking stick.

He journeyed around town and took a seat to listen in on what was going on.  Sounds like the children were running around trying to scare people, and if they successfully startled someone, they would be entitled to give that child candy. Sounds like there were festivities.  Bobbing for apples.  And the smell of a great feast being laid out and prepared. "Thou must remember that what we receive from the land, we must eventually give back!  The Hollow reminds us that with all we have, there is more to be taken away.  Do not covet your items.  Covet your friends, your family, those that cannot be replaced!"  Sounded like some sort of preacher, telling the story of the Hollow.  He had heard it before but....maybe not...quite so well as now.

Nameless begins to tear up as he listens carefully he remembers his friends and all those he left behind so long ago. (I would set aside everything I am entitled to by birth to have things back as they were. I would gladly live in poverty to be loved)  he wipes the tears from his cheek (but Malaki is dead Fhio is gone to Malius and Eru.. is yet to be sorted.. Valli, Anada and Alarin seem my only allys... Like it or not I will return to a different world than I left)   he gently  places his face in his hands as he continues to listen to his surroundings

The preacher began to tell a story he had not heard before.  Someone who used to live in the village over 300 years ago.  Someone named Holly.  They also told the story of the Hollow's Tree.  That it was from this old black decrepit tree that the Hollow steps out of.  The Reason this is Hollow's End, is because it is the first and last place the Hollow visits every year. Nameless Listens Carefully to the story of Holly, It is comforting to hear new knowledge even if it is only folklore. (It is a gift from Sensus to be given new story's I did not have to ask for or seek by my will)I must remember to  offer thanks at his alter for this...

"Long ago, there was a young girl with brilliant fiery red hair that was just a normal person of this town, like you and I.  But every year, since she could understand what giving was, she didn't just give away half her candy to the Hollow's Tree.  She gave all of it.  She gave everything she had, and this life kept taking things away.  She lost her husband, she lost her unborn baby.  She last her farm.  But that never stopped her.  Every year, she gave everything she owned to the Hollow." "One year, or so the legend goes, she offered herself to the Hollow, to be taken.  But she stood before the great spirit and said "You may take me, my life, my soul, and everything I am.  But please, spare my village, my friends, my people." "Legend goes, that upon this offer, the Hollow hesitated, for the first time in its existence.  The Hollow spoke to her." "You and everything you are, you are now mine.  I will spare your village, for now." "And the townsfolk, were so moved by this woman's sacrifice, that they left out offerings for the Hollow, not out of fear.....but of thanks.  And so, every year, the children leave half their candy at the Hollow's tree and thanks the Hollow for letting them live.  The adults make their offerings as a show of reverence to the Hollow and its kindness.  And, as the Hollow promised, no true resident of Hollow's End has ever had anything taken by the Hollow since.  But, it is our job to pass on the story of sacrifice.  What if we were all like Holly, and show us the meaning of giving to others.  Give of ourselves, our talents.....our love, and our hearts.  Maybe, if we could learn this tale of unconditional love, maybe there would finally be no need for war.  As we would be there.....for each other....no matter how big, no matter how small."

Nameless is moved by the story.. he ponders the things he has and has given... ponders the little he now has and how everything he has was given to him by a stranger. ( I am great-full for this kindness, I wonder if the townsfolk were as generous to Holly as they have been to me) Nameless raises his head to the Sky --"Zet'tallen, I have offered my life to you in remorse and grief yet you have spared me.. I wish to honor you with the life you have allowed me to retain for it is by your grace I have been spared. Bless these kind people for they are generous and good"

"Zet'tallan blesses all his wards."  A sudden voice from his right.  Oh, it was his guide, sounded like he was biting into an apple.  "You know....he's carrying us on his back.  He took physical form so he could carry us to where we need to go.  He puts his very existence in danger...just to help us."   He sounds a bit....sad as he says this. "And all we do is hurt him...."  His guide turns to him and places an apple in his hand. "The portal to Death's realm....it released some creatures that feed off the inhabitants with ever reaching tentacles.  Then....there is...the old Sidhe Lords."  Nameless thinks to himself “He knew about that?” his companion continues  "Did you feel the entire world shake a few weeks ago?  That was them.....they hurt Zet'tallan....like ripping out his arm and reattaching it wrong.  But Zet'tallan doesn't care that he is hurt....well....I mean he cares cause it hurts, but he cares more if his Wards are hurt...."

Nameless turns to him and signs "we hurt him - we don't think - not understand we hurt" The devoted interrupts "I devoted my life to Zet'tallan, at first, just for the journey, to explore and live my life how I wanted.  But, as time went on, I discovered, that even as a Sidhe....I could keep the balance....help others....and stop those that want to hurt others...." "Do I miss my fancy house, my servants and my daily scented baths?  Heh....oh yes...there are days I really do.  But..."  He scratched his neck, chuckling.  "I don't NEED those things....want yes, but....not need, I guess.  I'm not the slave of the Dream anymore...."

Nameless smiles as he remembers the hot  baths with rose petals and lavender Eru used to run for him ... In the late spring when the flowers are at their fullest... He nods his head.. "no need, yes want" Nameless nips small bits of the apple chews for a while and tosses his head back to swallow"

Stay here until the Hollow comes, your eyesight and tongue will be given back, then you can walk back for Compass Rose.  Here you will learn that it is the actions of others that shape this town.  So, you can either isolate yourself out in the wilderness....or contribute to this town in the state you are in..."

Nameless looks puzzled, and signs clumsily  "How? I have nothing to give, I can not work, or lead, I have no trade, even children seem afraid of me... Wha..."

The devoted reaches out and stops Nameless in mid gesture "You can work,  Anyone can work.  Whether it be carrying things, or otherwise.  Find something, something you can offer.  And you will receive your gifts ten fold."

Nameless Rises to his feet and Bows to his companion... he waits a moment then with all his strength pulls him to his feet and embraces him and kisses each cheek... He pulls him close and whispers in his ear, although barely intelligible whispering with no tongue for enunciation..."Thank you sir...you have saved me from myself.. you have brought me here and I will do as you have asked, as Zet'tallen has asked. I have nothing but I will give what I can to hallows end.,, I give you my word" Nameless takes a step back and bows again 

The man nodded, looking a bit taken aback by the embrace, but simply patted his shoulder in return. "I will be close by....if you need help.  But...these people are kind.  I am sure you will be okay."   "Good luck...."

[nameless-blind-mute]

Relief at last- Day 29

--Nameless sits atop a hill in the grass unaware that Luna and Sol are about to cross paths directly over head blotting out almost all light as they kiss.

suddenly an epiphany strikes him and he stands raising his hands to the sky--

Zet’tallen I have discovered my greed, my greed is my lust for knowledge! all the things I have done that have hurt you have been in my quest for knowledge, the sacrifice of my people the suffering I have caused... all for knowledge.

I have been bless Lord Zet’talen by people who love me and follow my vision but in my quest for knowledge has led hem to suffer and lost us the keystone. Not in money or riches, but knowledge I have caused suffering. A suffering I was blind to and only through becoming blind have I been able to see my sin. Zet’talen you are wise and Right in my suffering and although my patron God requires me to seek knowledge I hereby swear oath to you to be gentle and kind in my acquisitions of new knowledge. 

There remains the issue of my pride  Zet’tallen and still I know not what you ask of my heart. I have nothing left in me and it is impossible to be proud in this state. Alarrin found me and witnessed my horrible condition and I cried many tears in his presence as he informed me of what has passed since my journey begin. he saw my weakness and frailty and still he gave me kindness and affection. his gentle words soothed my wounds even though they were full of confusing and horrible details. It is the love and loyalty of my people that fuels my will to survive this day. Eru, to whom I have always been strong and fearless has been in my mind and bore witness to my brokenness and full weakness, I was not embarrassed but overjoyed to feel her presence even though she knew my state of dismay. so I ask you... is this the heart of pride?

Even your Devoted Valli has found my mind. and though he had wounded me in the past it was I who offer forgiveness of his trespass and begged he forgive my rage. My heart I poured out before him without abandon. I told him secrets about my weakness I have shared with no man begging in tears for forgiveness of my sins against our proud culture. This is not the action of pride.

So great Zet’talen I beseech you to teach me of my pride, speak to me about what must change in my heart to atone and Learn the the errors in my ways that I may return a stronger and wiser leader of those who call Compass Rose their home. 

--Nameless reaches down and picks up his staff, and strolls back into the valley as the eclipse fades and the light returns to haven--

[nameless-blind-mute]

Empty Vessel - Day 16

-- Nameless sits by a creek nursing his bleeding and thorn filled fingers after feasting on a blackberry bush he stumbled upon haphazardly --

I think I understand... I understand what it is I am to do...

I have exhausted all my pleas, and poured out my sorrow. I have felt the full depth of what it is to be abandoned, to be alone where no one seems to care if you exist or disappear. I have begged for mercy and death and my cry’s fell on deaf ears. Where once I was a hero I have become discarded as contents of a chamber pot with no hero to come to my rescue. I have poured out in blood all the strength and virtue I have within me and become empty.

Should this be my fate and my atonement? Is this what I deserve? It matters not for it is the burden I willingly accepted to cleanse my heard of disfavor in the eyes of Zet’talen.

I cannot defend my actions. I cannot repay Mari her night of suffering at the hands of my inquisitor. I cannot undo the months of incarceration and questioning I have weighed on Cura. In my Duties as Baron I have never taken life without cause but I have put great pressure on those who live and choose to defy me. In fact I do not know how to lead without a firm hand. My counterparts would strike with a closed fist where I strike with an open hand but the fact remains I strike with equal ferocity. 

I do not know another way. I am afraid... I am afraid that my enemy’s and those who would take advantage of me will destroy me with ease if I do not stand firm, and I do not know how to defend myself and those whom I lead without force. my hands are open and I hold no weapon or strength to fight any longer. 

I have nothing left to give, I have lost my friends and family and my riches and reputation. I have lost the joy of seeing beauty and finding my own way.The Only one who can hear me is You. You Zet’talen.. You are the answer and my hope for no one else knows I exist, no one knows if I am alive or dead.

I ask you Great Zet’talen... I ask you to fill this empty vessel. Teach me how to rectify my ways and to rectify the world. 

I believe I was  good man, perhaps even one of the better men... But it is not enough to be better when my desire to usher in change.. To start a revolution of kindness and equality where all races are respected for their gifts and honored for their place in the world. How could I become emperor peacefully with violence in my heart. What right could I have to eternal life if I take it by force. Then I am no better than any other Sidhe, no more deserving than anyone.

As you have rescued all the life on haven and you keep us safe, Teach me to rescue the life of Compass Rose, teach me to keep the lives of our people safe. The way you would have me do. So that I can then save all my people from their own violence and greed. By your example to me teach me to be and example to others. 

Fill me with your wisdom for I am empty of my own...

[nameless-blind-mute]

A Day of reflection- Day 13

--Nameless has made his way for almost two full weeks.  Stumbling, falling scrounging, full of self loathing and pitty. Caught between trying to understand the Will of the great God Zet’talen and begging for the mercy of death to befall him.  There have been no answers nor any kindness received,Still he survives dedicated to completion of the atonement which was agreed with the devoted of the Great God. He now sits on a muddy riverbank late in the night and thinks to himself  --

Two weeks. Almost Two weeks since my life and my love and all I hold dear was taken by the gods. Two weeks ago today I was drunk in my garden and Anada came to me offering to lend me money as i had given all I had to save Da’avel and had no money to pay my staff. She came to me and offerd to help me but I could not take it as it was all she had. What kind of man would I be to take the last notes of his servant to bay his own bills... no man at all.

she sat with me and I poured out my heart to her, I told her of y dreams and my loneliness and she comforted me and consoled me, she assured me that I was doing a good thing here and that the people, although hey did not yet know how to approach me they believed in me and what I was trying to do here. She trusted me and understood me even though just days before believed I to be responsible for her childhood loves death. For a moment I thought I was finally making a difference and that people were beginning to see me as Who I am not the Sidhe I am expected to be...

Then Tannana and her Devoted came to me and took away my favored handmaiden, whom I had raised as close to my own child as our culture would permit, the girl saved from death and I took into my home and at the age of 5. They told me that the only way I could save her was to give her up and send her from my house. Tannana Ripped the heart from my chest and after i gave her that which she requested of me through her devoted guardian she then informed me that I would still die...That an abomination was coming to kill me... 

  Why Tanana, would you kill me twice? You ask me to throw myself on the sword and when I do, you say its not enough.. How am I not to hate you for your cruelty? 

Then but a few hours later, I again cast myself before a god, begging for forgiveness of my transgressions so that I may live and help save my people... But instead of mercy and forgiveness, advice and council I am judged harshly .. a millstone is tied to my neck and I am cast into the darkness to weep and suffer for months... with no gaurentee that any of my people will be saved by my sacrifice. no promise of one saved soul, no promise of one innocent life to be spared from the horrors that the adventures unleashed upon the world. Yes it was I to open the gate and send them in seeking knowledge for me and riches for themselves but they willingly have now brought out wraiths and mimics who promise to destroy all we hold dear.. foolish decisions on their part made only possible by my own foolishness.

But here we are now 2 weeks past the fateful day where I gave up everything, and I have received no kindness or warmth. the only news I received is that my most dedicated officer has been run of and the new surgeon has turned against me. My hunger has driven me to depravity beyond forgiveness, my loneliness has driven me to days of weeping and the deepest sorrow. 

I now question if all whom I thought I trusted have either turned against me or completely forgotten me. I had hoped that a few or maybe even many would go to the devoted and give testimony of  my character and beg for my atonement to be shortened... but no not a word was given, and i know this because surely if others game to my aid the Devoted and the great Zet’talen would see kindness to give me mercy. 

It appears I have been abandoned by all. left to suffer endlessly without death. 

If I were to inflict this suffering on even the worst criminal, I would be viewed as a monster, harsh and brutal. Even Meo, who confessed to me treason and involvement in countless innocent lives lost, I gave a swift and clean end with honor. I did not make him suffer for even a moment and placed no embarrassment on him. SO if I am so evil how is it that I am more merciful that Zet’talen?  More Kind than the one who bears the world? 

I do not speak as to commit blasphemy, but I question the logic, I question the balance... I threw myself at your feet begging for mercy, and you pulled out my eyes and tongue and cast me away like the contents of a bedpan. How am I to trust you, and not despise your name for this cruelty?.. 

IN my acceptance of this atonement you promised that others would come along to help me and surprise me with their kindness but there has been no one. I am glad for this as I wish no one to have to endure my hideous filth and disfigurement, but still this is a promise you made... a promise unfulfilled...

So how am I to trust your kindness towards the people? I am empty inside... there is nothing left to break, nothing left to crush... you Gods have taken everything from me... every last drop of me... now what will you build with the aching husk you have left here to rot?  will you build a murderous sadistic psychopath? OR a Pacifist spineless broken shell of a Sidhe useless for anything but a servant even though I was once one who once could rally the people to a cause and lead army's into fierce battle. Are you good or evil Zet’tallen? Tell me because as it sits now your utter despise for me leads me to believe i know nothing of you

Speak to me Zet’talen.... SPEAK TO ME! Tell me what to do next or just kill me because if I am without love and compassion I do not deserve to be set free on the world, and If I am doomed to live without being loved and deemed not worthy of compassion then it is not a life worth living... Guide my mind or rip off my head for to do any less is cruel and harsh. 

-- Nameless leans back onto the dirt and trys to remember the look of Luna and hers stars, but images are erased from his mind. He trys to to remember the face of Eru but there is nothing but darkness... without a drop of hope left in his heart he faces the great black space of aether in silence until he drifts off to sleep.--