my top 10 songs from august
bit of an iregular one for this month. it's not the last day and I haven't stopped listening to music yet, but I'm moving in two days and I'm extremely busy, so here we go.
1. Overwhelmed by Ryan Mack Remix
this song describes the way I've been feeling lately perfectly. sadly, I'm in a very bad place mentally, constantly fighting my demons and ADHD isn't helping me with any of this.
2. hostage by Billie Eilish
this one somehow became the one that represents love the most for me. I know it's not intended to be a fun, happy little love song but it reminds me the strange ways I have and have been loved before. it is safe and comforts me.
3. Constellations by Jade LeMac
I've watched the first tiktok snippet of this song and have been waiting ever since. it's real special to me because I've been planning a tattoo for the last four years and I'm finally getting it next friday! (actually two tattoos, one of them is the Cassiopeia constellation, but more about this in a future post!)
4. Change my clothes by Dream & Alec Benjamin
been a huge fan of Alec since spring, 2019 & one of Dream's since autumn, 2019, so it was evident, that I'll like this song. I was so right, it is something real special, especially for me. I'm proud of them.
this month I made huge changes. I started to talk to my friends about the shit I'm going through, and at a party it slipped out of my mouth, that I've attempted suicide once before. this song helps me to cope with shit like this and makes me stronger every time I listen to it. and even though there are still loads that I can't talk about, I'm on my way to become something even more.
"It's not a secret, I'm a puzzle, got a lot of missin' pieces
Underneath this strong persona I put on's a kid that's screamin"
6. Oliver Twist by ArrDee
some days are harder than others, and this song just helps me get out of bed on even the hardest ones. listening to this while I'm on my way in the city just makes everything so much easier. always puts a smile on my face!
7. I Miss The Rage by Majetso Mixer, Mario Judah
this is hyping me up real good. I am so productive when listening to this song. I can channel my inner (usually hiding) anger into productive shit. a real special one!
"I'm so heavy, jump into my ocean. Can't you see me sinking? Love the fear of falling. Don't you know I'm too young? Won't you hear me calling you? Nothing hurts me now"
that's it. all of it. pure gold.❤︎
9. Playing Dangerous by Blu Shore
this is a random song, I accidentally put it on my playlist but it's so good, I can't stop listening to it. the storytelling-perspective is always a great choice for me.
10. @ my worst by blackbear
this one... it hurts real bad. some days I feel like I've became the thing I fear the most: the worst version of myself. I've been treated like shit for the biggest part of my life, and I'm afraid, I'll become toxic and I'll hurt people just like these people hurt me before... yep.
and because we had such a great month with so many new songs, I'll make a seperate post with the honorable mentions!
