Aug 27, 2021
Alice: Ryou-kun talks in his sleep
Kurokiba, sleeping: I’m gonna rip your head off… I’m gonna rip your damn head off, grandma…
seen from United States
seen from France
seen from New Zealand
seen from United States
seen from Sri Lanka
seen from South Africa
seen from Russia
seen from United Kingdom
seen from Australia
seen from Japan
seen from Maldives
seen from Japan
seen from China
seen from Germany
seen from United Kingdom
seen from Russia
seen from Belarus
seen from United Kingdom
seen from Portugal
seen from Argentina
Alice: Ryou-kun talks in his sleep
Kurokiba, sleeping: I’m gonna rip your head off… I’m gonna rip your damn head off, grandma…
Actual footage of the moment when Kurokiba Ryo saw his whole future in this girl’s eyes.
Alice: Ryou-kun, truth or dare?
Kurokiba: truth
Alice: how many hours have you slept this week?
Kurokiba: ... dare.
Alice: I dare you to take a nap
Kurokiba: I don’t like this game
Kurokiba: you’re my best friend. I would do anything for you
Alice: I want you to eat three meals a day and have a decent sleep schedule
Kurokiba: absolutely not.
Alice: look, I made a marshmallow Ryou-kun! His arms are crossed because he’s mad at the other marshmallows for annoying him. Do you like it?
Kurokiba, tearing up: it’s okay
Alice calls bae after work to provide some encouragement (and make sure he hasn’t cursed his boss out yet).
Ryoali with Erik Newborn
Nakiri Alice stood in her food laboratory with the baby in one hand and a test tube in the other because the child was hungry and she was kind of bored. Who said a woman couldn’t have it all?
“Okay, Erik. Today, mommy’s going to teach you the basics of molecular gastronomy,” she whispered to the three month old. “But this has got to be a quiet lesson because everybody else is sleeping.”
Her son smiled at the sound of her voice—so smart!—and Alice took this as license to commence her lecture. “Right here, we have some top of the line baby formula. But it’s kind of basic, right? So what we’re going to do is put it in the blender with some sodium alginate.” She marveled at the things a person could accomplish one-handed as she blended the mixture and poured it into a container to settle.
“And while we let that sit, we’re going to prepare a calcium chloride setting bath. At this stage, it’s crucial that we—oh, hi darling.” Alice grinned at the sound of her husband’s footsteps. Quiet though they were, she’d know them anywhere. “Can you hand me a syringe?”
Ryo did so wordlessly before it occurred to him to ask, “Alice, what are you doing down here?”
“What does it look like? I’m making our spawn a bottle,” she said as she began to suck the formula mixture into the syringe.
“Please don’t kill my child,” he said in a deadpan voice.
“Papa’s so funny, Erik,” Alice told her son, who was now staring up at the syringe with a transfixed expression. “He really thinks I’d put you in harm's way after I labored for ten hours to bring you into this world.”
“Alice—”
“It’s perfectly safe, as you well know. I even checked with the pediatrician.” Alice smiled down at her child again. “I know papa complains a lot, but it’s only because he loves you. He’s always going to protect the two of us, so we have to put up with him sometimes.”
At this, Ryo shot her a sidelong glance. “He’ll learn the truth when he’s old enough.”
“Not a chance,” she replied with a smirk. “This one will always be on my side.”
Alice walked over to her husband and placed Erik in his arms, then kissed them both on the cheek. “Alright, my wonderful spawn. Papa’s going to narrate the rest while I finish up.”
“Narrate?” he asked, eyes narrowing slightly. It sounded like she was about to make another unreasonable request.
“Mhmm. Just explain what I’m doing so he understands the basics.”
“Alice...you know he’s only three months, right?”
She waved him off with a petulant laugh. “He’ll get it for sure. We Nakiris are brilliant, you know.” She looked back at their son once more. “You see, Erik, your papa should be more in awe of me. When you marry a girl you’ll have to do better and—”
“I thought I was narrating now,” the dark haired man pointed out.
Alice merely grinned at him before getting to work with the syringe. “Proceed.”
“Alright, kid. Your mother runs her mouth a lot—”
Alice’s cheeks started to puff up. “Hey! Don’t tell him that; he’s still impressionable! You have to praise me more to him, darling!”
“See, that? She does that all the time, and she can be a handful, but eventually you’ll learn how to tune out the stuff that doesn’t make sense.”
“EXCUSE ME?”
“But even though your mother can be a brat and a tyrant, she’s really a brilliant woman.”
Alice felt herself start to blush a bit. Now that was much better.
“So now she’s hooking the syringe up to her caviar maker. Not real caviar, though.”
“Gah?” Erik asked inquisitively, looking up at his father.
"Yeah, same, kid. But anyway, she took the machine out because if she didn’t we’d be down here all goddamn night—”
“Don’t curse in front of him!”
“It’s part of his education,” he replied, monotone and unrepentant. “Anyway, when the sodium alginate mixture hits the calcium chloride bath, it spherifies because science. Your mother will explain in greater detail when you’re old enough to form words.”
Alice strained the formula spheres and rinsed the excess calcium off them. “All done, my spawn!”
“Now your mom is going to try to make you eat these milk beads, and I’m going to make you a real bottle in an hour.”
“So mean, Ryo!”
“Kidding.” He kissed her then, and glanced warily at the child. “I hope.”
Nakiri Menfolk
Summary: In which Nakiri Alice enjoys the company of the men in her family.
The sky was overcast, and raindrops sharp as needles plummeted over the estate. Nakiri Alice stood on the veranda, watching her menfolk chase a football around the grounds. It had started with Ryo drilling Erik in preparation for his upcoming match, but then her father—and even grandfather—decided to join in.
Ryo never went easy on their precious spawn, even though he was barely six years old, and the others had no intentions to either. Hard training was the Nakiri way if there ever was one, and though it was often very difficult to watch, she had to admit that he was getting good, fast.
Alice smiled broadly when her child managed to kick the ball through her father’s legs, then rushed to get it again. “That’s my genius spawn!” she cheered. “Good try though, papa!”
She watched them for a long while, sipping the rosehip tea one of the housekeepers had brought her, and rubbed her stomach absently. She hoped the next baby would be a girl; at present, she and her mother were severely outnumbered.
“Come inside already!” she shouted, once lightning started crashing into the nearby sea. And because none of them were in the habit of denying her, they did as she asked.
The housemaid returned just as they started heading back to the house, and — per Alice’s request — dropped off a stack of warm towels.
“Honestly,” she said, pouting slightly as she passed the towels out, wrapping the smallest one around her shivering spawn. “How long were you all going to stay out there if I didn’t say something? Grandpa, I expected better from you, at least.”
“What can I say? These ones keep me young.” The old man smiled at her, and at once Alice found herself unable to act cross any longer.
She sighed. “Make sure you warm up by the fire,” she said. “Erina will not let me hear the end of it if you fall ill.”
“My Alice has become so responsible,” her father, Soe, chimed in then. “In addition to being adorable and brilliant, she’s also grown into such a reliable woman.”
“You’re so kind, papa!” she gushed. “But make sure you don’t keep mama waiting for you in the lab.”
With that her father blanched, and very quickly made his way back into the house.
“We’re starting practice at 5:30 tomorrow morning,” Ryo said to Erik when they were the only ones left. “You’re faster now, but we still have to improve your footwork and stuff before the match.”
Her son heaved a sigh, which translated roughly to ‘Does it really have to be so early?’ but didn’t argue. He didn’t argue much; Alice would have to teach him to be more difficult one of these days.
“You know, your godfather is going to be here this weekend with Akane,” she pointed out, just remembering. “They’ll probably end up watching the match with us.”
Erik’s eyes widened slightly at this, and Ryo looked at him, face deadpan. “If you lose in front of Hayama’s daughter, she’ll skewer you, I think. Better start practice at five.”
“Yeah, you’re right,” Erik said. “Are we running first?”
“Of course.”
Alice smiled in sympathy. “But for now, you’re going to go inside and have something hot to drink so you don’t catch a cold before your match.”
Her son glanced at her quizzically. “Mom, we both know that’s not how germ theory works.”
Alice’s cheeks puffed up in a pout. “Yes, love, but I was on a maternal streak and it sounded right. Don’t ruin the moment, okay?”
“Ok.” The boy sighed, and Alice kissed his forehead, making him smile back even though his scientific sensibilities were still offended.
“That’s my spawn,” she said. “Now go warm up.”
“He’s a natural athlete, I think,” Ryo observed, watching their son head inside the estate. “Just needs more training.”
“You push him too hard, you know,” she said. “You all do.”
When her child wasn’t training with his father, he was in the lab with his grandpa, or the boardroom with his great-grandfather—all of them preparing him tirelessly for a role that would never be his.
“Training builds character,” the dark haired man told her, “and being good at things builds confidence. He’ll need both to survive in this world.”
Alice started a bit at this, but then her features softened. “Your neuroses are showing, darling,” she said. “Your children are Nakiris. Survival is guaranteed.” She brought his hand to her stomach then, covering it with her own. “Now make me a shellfish stew for dinner! You’ve kept me waiting long enough, and your daughter is hungry in here!”
Her husband regarded her with a half nod, then kissed her unexpectedly, before heading in towards the kitchen.