AG: I used to really like him and always wanted to help him get stronger, so that he might stand a fucking chance to actually make it on our world.
It's honestly tragic. You probably did like him initially - but, as a consequence of your worldview, your genuine attempts to make him stronger were warped into abuse. He was never going to internalize your lessons, because the manner in which you were delivering then were far too cruel to be effective.
AG: 8ut he was just soooooooo weak and indecisive. He wouldn't change!
Due to her cruelty, Vriska completely failed to impart the lessons that she was trying to - and, of course, she blames Tavros, for refusing to be bullied into changing.
The more he 'failed' her tests, the angrier she got. The angrier she got, the more deliberate her abuse became.
Until the cruelty was the point.
AG: And when he tried to change, it was too little and too l8. Always l8. L8ey L8ey L88888888. AG: Too l8 to kiss me. AG: Too l8 to kill me. AG: He couldn't do it when I really needed him to. So when I saw he was actually serious a8out trying to kill me now of all times… AG: I just got SO AAAAAAAANGRY.
Anyone with a brain could tell you Tavros isn't a killer. He's a gentle troll, and cold-blooded murder would traumatize him.
So Vriska trapped him in a situation where not murdering her would also traumatize him, and got angry when he chose the wrong trauma. This scenario was unwinnable by design, just like their last FLARP game.
Don’t kid yourself, Vriska. You were screwing Tavros around until the end.
AG: I know our races are completely different. And I really h8 the idea of you thinking worse of me 8ecause of this. AG: 8ut I don't have anyone else to talk to a8out it!
Holy hell, Vriska’s really going through it.
The worst part is, John is the only confidant she has. She's incredibly lucky he's as easygoing as he is.
EB: i bet karkat would listen. EB: or what about terezi? she's pretty nice, isn't she? […] AG: For one thing, they would pro8a8ly just 8e pissed off at me for killing Tavros. AG: And more importantly, there's no waaaaaaaay I could tell them how I really feel a8out it.
I think I'm starting to understand why Vriska's begun to change.
So far, Vriska's life has been very simple. She killed because she had to, and she's convinced herself that it's the only correct way to live. A brutal life makes you strong, after all, and a peaceful life is a burden.
Alternian culture validates this worldview, as every troll is expected to take part in the Empire's conquests. Her nation wouldn't want her to stop killing - it'd just want her to switch targets. According to the world around her, Vriska's way of life is correct. She's never been meaningfully challenged on her beliefs.
Until today.
Today, Vriska has been confronted by a species who don't want to kill. A species seemingly populated by wimps like Tavros, who all watch ridiculous movies and believe in lame nonsense like friendship.
A species of weaklings, who weren't blessed with an upbringing as violent as hers.
And a species that succeeds anyway.
I think humanity, and John in particular, have called into question some of the most fundamental truths of Vriska's existence.
And something inside her has just said ‘w8 a second........’
