#s1post

[experimental-passion]

Sleepover.

"...and you can sleep on the floor, miss Vanrosa~. I'm sure a hardened military vet like you wouldn't mind in the slightest, yes?"

With a smirk, Alice turned over on the bed, her back facing Vanrosa while she cuddled the only other girl left on the queen sized bed. Leaving just enough room for the rabbit in between them to breath comfortably.

"That was the plan... but hearing it come from you makes me wanna just grab my pillow and tell you to move over."

"Aww... but then were wouldn't be enough space for this adorable little rabbit!"

Alice ran her hands through the head of the white-haired rabbit, who moved it's head up along her touch. Bright blue eyes softening as the bunny squinted it's eyes, getting more comfortable.

"Excuse you, this is my bed. And Fujio has his own bed, he's just here with us because it's not his bedtime yet."

"You're just gonna let your best friend sleep on the floor??"

"There's enough room for all of us, just put my rabbit down so he can get to bed."

With a disappointed sign, Alice scooped up the bunny and placed it on the floor beside the bed. Sure enough, it started to hop off to it's own bed in the corner of the room.

"Emily, you can-"

"Yep, I've found my spot."

The redhead plopped down on the other side of the bed, laying down on Ichi's right side. She didn't bother to get beneath the blankets like Ichi, being quite comfortable even without them.

"So what are we watching now?

"Have you guys heard of Madoka Magica?"

"That's a kid's show, c'mon, let's put on something more interesting."

"Please, please, please! I promise you guys are gonna like it. Just give me like 3 episodes..."

"Okay, well don't blame me if i end up sleeping through it."

[experimental-passion]

"I would like to formally apologize."

"My unannounced hiatus has left some fans wondering and worried, especially since some fans have noticed how burnt out I've been. I desperately needed a break, and I've returned to make it up to you all."

The entertainer stood up from his seat, and took a bow to the audience. The host watched carefully as he held that position for a few seconds, then standing back up straight to take a seat.

2 years. It had been 2 years since Jay's sudden disappearance, and yet the fans were still eating up his return. It was as if he had never left. Hell, if anything he had gained momentum with his sudden return.

The announcement of his return came with announcements of streams, merch, and even appearances in shows that couldn't wait to get their hands on him. It was scary how obsessed some people still were with him... but then again, that was almost to be expected from a prodigy like him.

Nothing about his appearance particularly stood out, but he seemed to still be able to charm people with charisma and attitude. That easy-going smile rested on his face like it was his default.

"I understand you were feeling burnt out, but you went completely radio silent in the past 2 years. Many people were worried. To not even leave a message is a little irresponsible, don't you think?"

"Yes, my actions were irresponsible. I did worry a lot of people, and I really should've at least made a statement clarifying my disappearance. I regret not doing so. I lived very selfishly for the past 2 years, and I wish to move forward and repair the goodwill I have lost with my community, who have remained very loyal even when I haven't deserved it."

The prodigy spoke with a calm sincerity, occasionally looking down into his lap as he spoke. Huh, he really did think he could just vanish and come back like nothing happened.

"What did you do within those 2 years?"

"Well, I focused on myself. I learned a bit of robotics, focused on taking care of myself, and took a step back to focus on why I initially chose to become an entertainer."

"Because your mother forced you?"

At the mention of his mother, his expression tightened. As if the host had struck a nerve. Jay took a breath, before continuing.

"Because I wanted to make people smile. My mother has nothing to do with it."

From behind spectacles, the host looked at Jay with sharp eyes. The eyes that Jay returned, were void of any real joy.

[experimental-passion]

"I feel like I'm gonna throw up..."

Hugging her white bunny a little tighter, Ichi focused on trying to take deep breaths. Trying desperately not to begin hyperventilating. The poor rabbit was now damp in her arms, which was no surprise given how quickly she had rushed to her room.

Unfortunately, her long white hair was still dripping water. Droplets falling onto the wooden flooring beneath, with some dropping on the head of the poor bunny. It didn't make any attempts to get away, simply tolerating the impromptu shower in favor of providing emotional support.

It didn't help that the house had been kept a little colder since most of the residents preferred it. It was tolerable to Ichi when she was dry. Right now, she had begun shivering a little in response to the cool air circulating around her.

She couldn't help but feel regret.

....why?

Why did it have to be her?

She was a mess.

Ichi's head was a mess, she shouldn't be responsible for the Lily and Nezumi. Not when people like Robin could make them happier than she ever could. Robin would know how to handle Lily's insatiable wanderlust, and Nezumi's desire to grow beyond the purpose Ichi had selfishly given them. She'd know how to guide Alexis, and love Imani.

Robin would make every person feel loved. She'd make them feel at home. She could nurture them into reaching their full potential. She'd ensure that they never felt anything but love.

She was just a failing facsimile.

Every smile, every warm hug, every bit of advice was given with shaky uncertainty. Who was she to give love, when she was so broken inside? Every time her little sisters ran into her arms crying, she asked herself what the caretaker would do. And then, she would embrace them with the same warmth she remembered Robin giving her.

All she could offer them was a echo of the love she had recieved.

They deserved so much more. They deserved more than an echo of love. They deserved to be embraced with more than a memory.

That night, she should've been embraced with the blazing inferno of death. Death had mistakenly reaped the wrong soul.

The little rabbit nuzzled her arm, and then stood up on her arms to get a little closer to her face. It's sniffing nose searched for something, so Ichi bent down a little more, staring at it with teary eyes.

As soon as it got close enough, it touched it's pink nose with her own. Gently pressing them together. It pulled away very briefly, before doing it again.

So she reached a hand to it, carefully scratching at the top of it's head. Taking a moment to reward it's attempts to comfort her.

The bunny squinted as her nails grazed the top of it's head, and then closed them entirely, leaning into the hand.

[experimental-passion]

"What was your life like before all of this?"

"Like, before you moved into this house and met us?"

Alexis looked right into the glass mirror in front of her, watching as the analyst carefully brushed her hair from behind. She looked... ridiculous. Colorful stickers were littered around the bottom of her eyes, thanks to the insistence of her three younger sisters. Not to mention the headband she'd never be caught dead wearing outside.

While Alexis looked at herself with disdain, Ichi looked at her with warmth. So, like... it wasn't all that bad. She just focused on the sensation of Ichi brushing through her tangled mess of hair.

"I told you, me and Lily grew up in an orphanage together. A terrible fire occurred, and I've looked after her ever since."

When people lied, they tended to add too many details. When they were hiding something, they didn't add enough.

It wasn't as if Alexis was trying to force Ichi to answer. Although, it was weird how she never looked uncomfortable talking about it, despite trying to omit details. Ichi considered them family, but it felt like she always kept them at arms reach.

"There's a lot of details missing from your story."

As Ichi's hands froze, so did Alexis. Her eyes darted up to read the analyst's expression... they looked deep in thought. Debating something.

"Do you really want to know? It's a miserable story. You'll probably leave feeling sad about it."

"I don't think so, since I know it has a happy ending."

That seemed to satisfy the analyst. It was a long story, and no doubt she'd have to make a few things up to not sound like a lunatic. But, maybe Alexis could handle most of the truth. The brush was placed down, and Ichi took a seat.

"Okay."

"I was raised to kill people..."

[experimental-passion]

"I'm not satisfied with my purpose."

"Please don't be mad at me."

That... came out of nowhere. Ichi's mouth was left hanging for a moment while she processed what they said. For one, she never heard Nezumi be so direct with her. Usually, the little mouse was as agreeable as can be. It was rare for them to assert their opinion. Second, their 'purpose' was just to help look after Lily. Did they grow tired of their sister, or did they simply feel burdened by the expectation?

She lowered the fork in her hand, placing it right next to the salad she had been eating. Despite Nezumi's nervous expression, her little sunset eyes remained focused on the analyst.

"Why would I be mad? I mean, I'm a little confused by what you mean. Did you and Lily have a fight or something..?"

Light green hair began to swish around as Nezumi shook her head, vehemently denying the assumption. Of course not! Their disagreements were always settled with either Nezumi allowing her sister to do as they pleased, or giving them puppy eyes to dissuade Lily from doing something harmful to herself.

"You asked me to look after Lily almost 3 years ago, and I was more than happy to. I liked seeing her happy, I liked seeing her laugh. It was nice to have somebody to focus on while I learned how to be their friend. I'm great at taking care of Lily, I do a good job looking after her."

"How come I can't do the same for you?"

Ah, she was starting to understand a little. It was a complicated question, and she wasn't sure how to give them a good answer. Ichi gave herself a few seconds to pick at the salad before trying.

"I'm your older sister, and it's my responsibility to take care of my younger siblings. I can't expect either of you to take care of me, you're both far too young for that. Besides, you help me enough by looking after Lily. It's not easy keeping somebody as hyperactive as her socially satiated."

They gave the little mouse a soft smile, which was received with furrowed eyebrows.

"You matter too... I want to be able to take care of you too."

All Ichi could do was sigh, reaching at their head to scratch their soft green mouse ears.

"You shouldn't have to."

[experimental-passion]

"She has a GIRLFRIEND??"

"How? Why??"

What the fuck? She'd only been gone for a little while now! How come in those few short years, her girlfriend was living with another girl? They really couldn't wait for her? She thought they had something special!

A mansion, far away in a beautiful snowy wonderland. Luxuries and love, no responsibilities! What could beat that??

Seriously.

What the fuck.

The girl she had been replaced with, was gross and sweaty. Struggling to wrangle a few children, failing miserably while Ichi had to get her hands dirty in the kitchen. They weren't nearly as pretty as Ichi either! What a downgrade.

She ducked below the window, biting her thumb as she sat in between some bushes. Heaven was so close! So close! Alas, there were so many people right now... whatever, even if Ichi was alone, she couldn't take her right now. She just got out of prison, she needed to set up another gilded cage for her darling.

Perhaps do some observing from the distance. Ensure there was no outsiders to intervene. No schoolmates, no rich bitch with a personal army. Ichi certainly had some... fucking annoying friends. This time, she'd be much more careful not to alert any of them...

But as soon as she could, she'd do something about that girl Ichi was cheating on her with.

[experimental-passion]

"Where did this come from?"

"I didn't see you as a romantic, Ichi."

"I'm not..!"

Okay, given the questions she had been asking, Ichi could see why Robin thought that. That wasn't the point though, the point was to see if Akira actually had a chance to get together with Robin. Surely he did since they gave glances across the coffee shop, but it didn't hurt to make sure.

"I was just wondering... if you ever thought of dating anybody? Most people have already gone on dates in high school, I even know a few people in my class who are in relationships right now. I'm sure if you really wanted, you could easily find a boyfriend."

"Hmm, maybe. I'll answer that question with another question. Are you looking for an s/o?"

"That's not an answer."

"It is."

Ichi sighed and laid down on the grass, gazing up at the blue sky to scan the clouds. That was entirely different, although she wasn't sure how she could explain that to Robin without pouring her heart out. It was too early in the afternoon for that.

"No... but, that's because my last relationship was a little rough. I'm not exactly in a rush to get my heart broken again."

That was pretty much the truth. Her last relationship was, in hindsight, doomed from the start. A clingy lover, and one who simply didn't have the time.

"You had a boyfriend?"

"A girlfriend, but why is that a surprise?"

"I thought the only reason you left your house was to pick up more coffee."

"It was during high school-!"

"I'm kidding!"

Even now as Robin smiled at her, it was painful. There was friendliness, but not warmth.

Kindness, but not fondness.

There had been so many conversations between them that Robin would never remember. Memories that only Ichi could recall. She was thankful she could talk to Robin again, truly. It was just- so different.

They weren't a family anymore.

That hurt.

"I answered your question, now you have to answer mine. A clear answer."

"Okay, fine. I just don't wanna get with some guy who isn't serious, I want somebody with the intention of becoming long-term. You'd be surprised how difficult that is to find."

A blade of grass was twirled between her slender fingers, pondering that caregiver's words. Well, it seemed like Akira had a shot after all.

"What would it take for you to get back into a relationship?"

"Huh?"

Suddenly she froze, that green slip pinched between her fingers. That... she hadn't thought about that. Admittedly, she kinda just gave up on that level on intimacy. Why go through the trouble?

"I don't know. I guess I kinda agree? I just want somebody committed to making things work out in the long run, no matter how difficult things get. Somebody I can depend on always being there. That's enough."

"Hmmm..."

A warm hand was placed on Ichi's cool forehead. It felt... nice. Feeling the touch of her friend, as they both looked at each other with equally mismatched eyes.

"Anybody would be lucky to have you."

[experimental-passion]

"I think you're like an angel."

"You have pretty white hair, and beautiful eyes."

An angel? Ichi pat the spot right next to where she sat, inviting Imani to take a seat next to her. After the kid took a seat, she began gently drag her nails atop of her head. Her little orange eyes shut closed in glee, getting to feel the sensation of being lovingly pet.

"Not as lovely as yours, they look like sunset."

"Lily has told me that too."

Ah, that did sound like something Lily would say. Along with a comment about how squishable their cheeks were. Those two things were Imani's most defining characteristics, it was no surprise she was popular among her schoolmates.

Cute, kind, loveable, and smart. Imani's mother must've been very proud of her daughter, and she was sure her father was as well. Not just any kid asked for help studying. At least, not her kid.

"Imani, have you thought about what you want to be when you grow up?"

"Yeah! I wanna be like you!"

It was said with such genuine surety, and those sunset eyes looked at the analyst with warmth. Ichi chuckled, a kiss atop of her head was given for their heartfelt compliment.

"No my love, I meant as a career. Lily already has something she has her heart set on. Is there any kind of thing that interests you?"

Despite distancing herself from Hope's Peak Academy, she still had connections. If there was any career path that Imani wanted to explore, Ichi would be more than happy to help assist them.

"Maybe a doctor? They help people pretty much every day. I'd like to help people."

"That doesn't sound like a bad idea, I'm sure you could pull it off if you study hard, I'd be happy to help you. I know a medic..."

"Medic?"

"Ah, they're similar to doctors. Perhaps at a later date, maybe learning some first aid would be a good start."

"Yush!"

Ichi hadn't been expecting to receive an answer today, but she was glad Imani had taken an interest in something.