#sacredxdawn

[touchofdcath-archive]

@sacredxdawn

“you’re kidding me!”

[criminalexwife-blog]

@sacredxdawn​

“so you’re the queen of this whole operation, hm? gotta say... you don’t look that intimidating to me.”

[thxunforgiven-blog]

♔

:: @sacredxdawn:: meme :: accepting ::♔ :Finding your muse wearing their clothes

 it’s another morning. if counted he’d run on morning 34. it’s a damned hot morning, too. like the past 14 of them had been. a real hot one. that has the morning smelling not so light. a heady scent. and it’s dry in the back of his throat. the sun’s making the room look all hazy. and so is the sheer netting that surrounds the bed. keeps the bugs out. makes everything look like a blur. the room is huge and he can hear the distant sound of water. it feels like he’s woken in someplace he shouldn’t be. found someplace he’ll be running from soon. 34 days and he’s starting to get that unsettled itch to go someplace else. the little things here and there are slowly not becoming enough. the day in and the day out of coming back here was becoming more routine than excitement. which was funny because the previous owners had told Kisa that this was the closest that they had ever gotten to living in paradise. it looked a hell of a lot like paradise ought to look. and he could’ve convinced himself that it was if it weren’t for the uneasy feeling he got whenever he sat too long.

 he saw her moving through the haze of the netting, like something that belonged there. her skin darker now, her hair a mess over her shoulders, his shirt only buttoned half way, he watched her move, her legs. she always seemed aware of him watching her. she doesn’t look back at him but when he calls her name she comes over to him. and she’s warm with the sun on her skin. but she feels different out here. like she’s slipping away from him. like she’s always going to be on the other side of something else. he doesn’t like thinking like that. but she always has been. something else. she comes passed the netting and towards him, like a dream, or something stronger. and she tell him he slept late. he can feel that in the heat of the sun on them, the heat on the skin of her thighs, and on the skin of her stomach once his shirt is undone. and he tells her that it was some deep sleep, resting his head on her chest. she doesn’t hold him. she places her hands on his shoulders like she’s waiting. but she’s never waiting and he knows that. there have been times when he’s even hated her for it. she asked him what was on his mind once. and lifting his head, he grips her thighs and smiles. ‘her.’ because it’s the simple answer. her, in his shirt just barely touching the tops of her thighs and the way the heat of the sun tastes on her skin, and her hands gripping tight and he’s waiting for the scratch of her nails. like he’s always waiting for the moment that she cuts through him. he’s been thinking of running again. paradise, they said. but he’s only felt freer moving place to place. she knows what it’s like been locked up. he’s not sure how much she’s willing to let go for him. that’s the thing with them, never sure.

[thxunforgiven-blog]

??

Send me a ?? for a thought my character has had about yours that they’d never admit.@sacredxdawn​

 another night just like the last time. another moment that passed them by so damned fast he wasn’t even sure if it had actually happened or not. he’s sitting on the edge of the bed and she’s standing up, struggling with the zipper at the back of her dress before she finally gets it with a heavy sigh. and it feels for a moment like the whole damned world isn’t even moving. he’s not looking at her but he’s aware of her. and she’s standing in the middle of the room like she’s unsure of what she’s supposed to do. ‘I should go’ eventually comes out of her mouth like something that she had to force out. but he doesn’t think it’s forced. he thinks she really does know she should go.

 he feels her coming closer to him. and he notices the heat to her hand before it even touches the side of his face. it’s a light touch before she moves her hand up to his hair, giving it a tug. and now he’s looking at her. he can’t help but look at her now that she’s made him do it. she’s dark and shadowed. she’s nothing to him. 

 ‘I should go.’

 again like she’s waiting for him to stop her. like she’s waiting for him to push her on out. she says everything happens for a reason. she says it between heavy breaths and her nails against the skin of his back. she says it like she’s trying to justify what can’t be. but that’s a lie and he knows it is. he knows that she’s right after all. she usually is. she sees things she shouldn’t.

 ‘you should.’

 but she doesn’t look disappointed. she nods. like she had expected that. but he’s still looking at her. and she still has her hand in his hair. but it loosens now. her face softens. and he wants to tell her to pull at his hair again, to scratch at his skin again, let her teeth graze over his throat, let her move against him like a wild fire that’s so damned willing to burn him up. let her place his hand across her throat and tell him to press, as she moves against him, her back to his chest, her lips parted, her body shaking. let them die away.

 but she’s soft as she lowers herself down onto his lap. soft with her hand at the back of his neck, looking into his eyes. she doesn’t tell him anything. but she smiles the sort of sad smile she so rarely shows. and it startles him as it always does when she looks at him like that. she’s human. too human. she’s Kisa, light, flesh, blood, soft against his chest as she rests against him. soft whisper against his neck . ‘I should go.’ again, like they needed the reminder. he doesn’t tell her this time. he puts his arms around her. tense, reluctant. and then tightly, like he can’t let her go. closes his eyes on her scent, heavy, overwhelming. her. he might love her, he thinks, or he could. he does.  erased. she’s too soft in his arms, too willing with her light kisses to the side of his neck.

 ‘leave.’

 and when she does she takes too much with her.

[thxunforgiven-blog]

I'm not here looking for absolution           Because I found myself an old solution

v; rather die young w/ @deathlessxdusk & @sacredxdawn​

[malogranatorum-blog]

@sacredxdawn liked for a starter 

                " Don't you think there is a sense of                 PRIDE knowing people would give                 their all to you? Just knowing the IDEA                 of what you can do, of who you are."

[thxunforgiven-blog]

•°•, - sacredxdawn & agardenofweeds lol

- Send me a •°•, and I will put my playlist on shuffle, and tell you our Muses -

@sacredxdawn

•Hate song - everything she wants - wham (wtf??)‘Some people work for a livingSome people work for fun, girl, I just work for youThey told me marriage was a give and takeWell, show me you can take you've got some giving to do’ •Angst song - rose in paradise - chris young (this is getting weird?)‘Now the banker is an old manAnd the mansion's crumbling downHe sits all day and stares at the gardenNot a trace of her was ever found‘•Love song - running up that hill - placebo ‘You don't want to hurt me,But see how deep the bullet lies.Unaware that I'm tearing you asunder.There is thunder in our hearts, baby.So much hate for the ones we love?Tell me, we both matter, don't we?‘•The first song they heard together - slow poison - the bravery‘Burn burn house on fireI'm so sick and tiredI can still remember your soundAnd it's cut cut cutting me downLike slow poison’ •Happy song - set fire to the rain - adele'Cause there's a side to you‘That I never knew, never knew,All the things you'd say,They were never true, never true,And the games you'd playYou would always win, always win.‘

@agardenofweeds

•Hate song - red lips - sky ferreira‘Red LipsYou’re ten a pennyCheap shotSpreading your legsFor the boys’ •Angst song - silver and cold - AFI‘Your sins into meOh, my beautiful oneYour sins into meAs a rapturous voice escapes, I will tremble a prayerAnd I'll beg for forgiveness’ •Love song - common people - pulp‘She told me that her Dad was loadedI said in that case I'll have a rum and coke-cola. She said fine and in thirty seconds time she said, I want to live like common peopleI want to do whatever common people do, I want to sleep with common peopleI want to sleep with common people like you. Well what else could I do - I said I'll see what I can do. ’ •The first song they heard together - white flag - dido’But I will go down with this shipAnd I won't put my hands up and surrenderThere will be no white flag above my doorI'm in love and always will be’ •Happy song - cats in the cradle - ugly kid joe‘I've long since retired and my son's moved away.I called him up just the other day.I said, "I'd like to see you if you don't mind."He said, "I'd love to, dad, if I could find the time.You see, my new job's a hassle, and the kid's got the flu,But it's sure nice talking to you, dad.It's been sure nice talking to you."And as I hung up the phone, it occurred to me,He'd grown up just like me.My boy was just like me.‘

[thxunforgiven-blog]

;from eden

:: @sacredxdawn

 he was always watching her. and it feels like the worst of all his habits. being with her is like sleeping with a loaded gun. only he doesn’t know which one of them is really gonna go off. it’s the way they work. no real direction, misguided conceptions. he met her on the edge of an over worn dream that he’d seen so many girls have. hadn’t seen one like her though. he watched her then just like he watched her now. her sitting on the steps of a known around sleaze of a son of a bitch that called himself a photographer, a fancy name for the kind of shit he did. and she looked down right pissed off. like she could’ve burned down the whole fucking city. he told her they could do it together.

 it hadn’t been anything at first. he was stupid enough to think he could write her off after one night. one night that seemed to burn right through his head. she had told him her name meant something about light. and that was what she felt like burning lights. that night she had burned on through him. and he had taken her to his apartment, and she had been laughing, shivering from the rare rain of Los Angeles. and he had helped her out of her dress. ‘just to get something dry’. but they had stood there in the quiet dark of the room, looking at each other. he couldn’t help but look. and she was all soft skin and long legs, and he dropped down on his knees before her and trailed his hands and mouth over every goosebump on her skin. and she was trembling for all kinds of different reasons that didn’t have anything to do with the cold. and he swore no one ever said his name like that. give or take a couple of weeks and she had moved in. he didn’t like her staying in that piece of shit motel. and she said ‘its nicer here’ with a look in her eyes that said she meant with him. those brown eyes that could make any man do anything she wanted. put a bullet in his own brain if she wanted. couldn’t be a more beautiful last sight.

 nice though. that wasn’t a word that he had ever heard used to describe him. nice. it sounded kinda funny when he thought about it. and one would’ve thought that she didn’t know the shit he was into. but she knew. she knew every hit taken and every payment demanded. well, the boss said he was good at what he did. the collector for the whole strip running this way and that. he broke a dozen or so guys faces with the hands he used to touch her. and he wondered what kinda sinning she brought to the table. she sure as hell didn’t look like an angel, didn’t love like one either when she’d put those full lips to his ear and told him exactly what she wanted from him. but there was something heavenly to the touch of her hands, to look in her eyes when they went all soft and she’d touch the cut on his face, the bruise over his eye. she’d wrap his hands as she straddled his lap and tell him she was sick of his bullshit. it was how half their fighting started. and once or twice she had left and never came back. and those days were the fucking worst.

 she had left two weeks ago on the tail end of her telling him he could find his ground else where, that was he was more than just some piece of shit collector for some middle man. and he told her that he’d seen her last shoot and she looked like a slut. couldn’t get away with talking shit like that to Kisa. and she hadn’t taken any of his calls. and she had told him she wasn’t ever coming back. well, that was fine by him. he’d forget her with his black out technique if he had to. if he had to. but he couldn’t. two weeks running and no matter what he took or how much he drank she was engraved on his mind. even when he beat the shit of out Trey down the street for a five grand pay out. his cut was cheap. she deserved more. she was making more now. she was something on billboards and a couple magazine covers. and he had bought the last one when he was high as shit. it was laying around some place in his cramped one bedroom. he’d convince himself that he’d thrown it out.

 but he found her. looking was something he always did. like he was looking for a lifeline someplace and only found it in her, in the lines she drew on his back when she’d come press up behind him, straddling his back as he laid down, pressing kisses to the back of his neck. in the soft lines that made her up. sometimes she’d come to him vulnerable and clutching and he’d fall into her without restraints. rare days, those raw ones. he found her staying with a new friend. Milly was her name. and she looked like those thick browed sticks that they hired to wear all the fancy ass clothes that Kisa said she liked. a yearning he couldn’t fulfill. did she really want all that? or was he imagining it? Uncle Eddie told him all women wanna really be taken care of. Milly’s place was massive and she took about 15 minutes to finally let him on in.

 he hadn’t seen her in too damned long. and she looked like she fit her just fine. like she owned the whole damned place. he almost felt guilty about wanting to drag her back home. but it wasn’t really home at all, was it? he moved to her and waited for Milly to disappear someplace to kneel down before her. he took one of her hands and her softness came with a burn. damn it, he had fucking missed her.

 “don’t you think it’s about time you come on back? I’ll even say sorry and mean it.”