♫ i be like sheesh! ♫ ( after the after-party ) ft. @saerinity
somewhere between the dramatics of silk blindfolds, the overzealous chorus of the sophomore crowd’s naïve yes!, and the ensuing blanket of overdone chatter living on borrowed time, jaehyun wonders if he’s had too much to drink. he’ll tell you about the uneasiness that makes a home in his stomach, the sensation of burning from the innards of his throat, but what he won’t admit is the way in which champagne stays lukewarm in its flute, stem perfectly pinched between thumb and index.
and here, the pesky tell-all: they say a drunkard’s vision swims in entropic technicolour, and as for his— why, it stays rigidly put.
all of this is to say that here, our golden boy is uncharacteristically staring. perhaps herein lies the evidence of insobriety, for somewhere between the sixth and twelfth hour of the night, jaehyun’s traded in discreet glances for blatant glares as he drinks in the sight of sera’s come-hither looks at insoo’s aggravating direction. it’s a scene that he finds impossible to stomach, feels the bile rising against the ridges of his throat.
( perhaps it’s anger. perhaps it’s disgust. )
see, somewhere between mother’s poorly restrained sobs, she tells him this: in the rough of river rapids, be as steadfast as a rock. as jaehyun peels his gaze from the nauseating sight, brings champagne flute to his lips to sip on tepid champagne, he wonders if he’s more like a rolling stone.
( picture this: he’s at the edge of a cliff, torso resting on grating gravel as he clutches desperately onto sera’s dear hand. he bears her weight in the sinews of his bicep, his tearing rotator cuff, but it’s not enough— no, he’s never enough, and so her fingers are slipping from his grasp, and he’s grunting and shouting and— )
he lets her go. pivots his body and turns away from her, the end of an era marked by a profound sigh. and for the first time tonight, when he’s not so caught up in his own head, he catches saeri’s pathetic, puppy-eyed stare in the direction he had only just forsaken, and it weaves resentment into his scowl.
you ever feel like the best girls fall for the biggest fucking weirdos?
“saeri!” the bellow leaves as a rebuke, but a look of warmth fixes quickly on his features before anyone can call his bluff. his stride over to her is armed with a toothy grin, mischief ever-present in his eyes. see, jaehyun understands the depth in which misery adores company. today, he tries to convince himself he’s the latter.
“party’s gettin’ stale—” here is his tease, paired with a smile that holds a secret and a nose that twitches playfully in faux contempt. tonight, jaehyun wants to get drunk. so the champagne doesn’t work— fine. he’s always known himself to be resourceful, knows the ways in which intoxication can overcome you without the vulgarities of liquid courage. here, he leans into her ear, perhaps an inch closer than is required for her to catch his whisper amidst the bustle of the crowd, “wanna go on an adventure?”