#safetyblanket

[rooma237]

Putting together a wood book box to store my pins in and decided to make it a fake "Safety Blanket" hardback. I will post the final product once it's complete!

(My photo editor had the option to turn my Sims photos into watercolor-type images, which is how I got the pics. I showed this to a friend, and she thought it was AI because my artistic abilities are limited at stick figures. 😂)

[spurloser]

#derkariertehimmel @fotogruber #skyisthelimit #rescuenet #trampolin #safetyblanket #spurloser #wolkenstopper #extremsport https://www.instagram.com/p/CC1ZmneJGiq/?igshid=bz2e3x3kp5dd

[mirthamigurumis]

Unicorn Safety blanket Granny/mantita por @cyclabrujita y Unicornio tejido por mi 😉 📌Bajo pedido. ➡ INFORMACIÓN vía Direct Mirtha Amigurumis -tiernos muñecos de colección- #hechoenEcuador #marcaecuatoriana #crocheted #instacrochet #crocheting #rajutan #häkeln #laferiadelparque #crochetlover #virka #крючком #amigurumilove #weamigurumi #gurumigram #handmadebyme #yarnaddict #амигуруми #かぎ針編み #あみぐるみ #uncinetto #viaalacosta #plazalagos #unicornlove #artesanasecuatorianas #plazanavona #amigurumiaddict #safetyblanket #crochetersofinstagram #unicorn #amigurumicrochet (en Guayaquil, Ecuador)

[rooma237]

Safety Blanket · Omegaverse AU

Realistically, Owen would probably be a beta just because he’s an average sized person and not the least bit dominant, but for the sake of this AU he is an alpha.

Trevor is an omega

Owen comes into his alpha at age 13, a relatively normal age. He’s brought to an alpha clinic and is taken care of through his rut.

Trevor is a very late bloomer.

His mother has been taking him to various specialists to see if something’s wrong. They all agree that he is definitely going to show as an omega due to hormone levels and having both sets of sex organs, but they don’t know why he hasn’t had a heat yet.

Heats are not able to be induced until age 18. Trevor agrees to have his heat induced just to get the whole thing over with because of the discomfort his body experiences, but is clearly very distressed by the whole idea because having a heat means having to take a mating partner for the situation to be fully satisfying to his omega.

As his 18th birthday approaches, Alexis begins to become increasingly concerned about Trevor. He keeps trying to back out of having his heat induced, and she tells him that he definitely can do that but he won’t be able to shake all the aches and discomfort. He’ll have to just learn to live with it. And that only serves to upset him even more.

Alexis goes to Owen and proposes a way to help make Trevor’s first heat a bit more comfortable—Owen can be his first mating partner.

It’s not something that’s exactly recommend. It’s a risk as any person just coming into their second gender are sexually unstable and may lose control and either bite or accept being bitten, and what if their safeguards against pregnancy fail?

But Owen understands that their mom is only suggesting it because they all know Trevor won’t be able to do it if it’s a stranger and there’s no one else. Owen is the only alpha Trevor has ever been close to. Owen is the only alpha who can do it.

Alexis and Owen go to Trevor and explain their idea.

Trevor gets all doe-eyed, asking Owen if he’s sure he’s okay with it. Owen is like, “Of course, I want you to feel secure. Having your first heat is gonna be scary. At least if I’m there, I can make it less so.”

There is no Heat Clinic in Bates, which works perfectly because Alexis has made it VERY clear to the boys that they can’t let Jacob know Owen is going to help Trevor through his first heat. She knows it’ll disgust him to no end and he’ll lose his shit on them.

Alexis books a motel in the closest town with a Heat Clinic and tells Jacob her and Owen are going along to support Trevor through this extremely anxiety-inducing experience.

The night before, Trevor and Owen both have to take pills that will begin the process of triggering their respective heat and rut. It’s recommended for an omega’s heat partner to be in rut as the mating will be more satisfactory.

Alexis goes to take a shower and the two brothers lay down together in the bed they’re going to share. Trevor admits that he’s happy Owen is going to be his first mating partner, and Owen admits he feels the same.

They go to the Heat Clinic. They’re both washed and given their second round of medication to set their heat/rut full steam ahead. They’re then brought into a cozy room with a king-sized bed and the softest looking sheets either of them has ever seen. The bedside table to the left side of the bed has a few items placed upon it; water bottles, protein bars, a bottle of lube, and knotted condoms (even though Trevor’s already been put on the pill).

The attendants who’d helped them through the prep process leave the two, who are now both dressed only in light-weight robes. None of the attendants know the two are brothers, only that Trevor is a late-blooming omega and Owen is an alpha he feels safe with.

When they’re alone, Owen approaches his baby brother, caressing both his cheeks. “Your skin is so glowing, honey,” he comments. “It’s… almost glittering… and you… Trevs, you smell so good… So sweet, baby boy, like cinnamon…”

“You smell,” Trevor breathed, finding himself starting to salivate, “like rain… Well, the smell that comes when it rains—petrichor, it’s called petrichor, it’s not technically rain but—You smell yummy, Owen. Wanna t-taste.”

Owen kisses him and then everything gets set into motion.

They mate for a full day, then they’re kept at the Heat Clinic for two more days as their pheromone levels keep ticking upwards and they’ll start to both become absorbed with need once again. The attendants assure Alexis that it’s normal; triggered heats & ruts can be unpredictable. The boys will return to themselves in no time. (It is actually not normal but the attendants don’t want to worry Alexis—they both take bets on whether or not Trevor will walk out with an alpha’s bite on his neck because the two of them are clearly super into each other. Genuine attraction elevates induced heats and ruts.)

Their second day at the Heat Clinic, Trevor is sprawled across Owen, both of them fully nude, and the lust has subsided for the most part, but it’s still there thrumming softly in the background. They can’t ever seem to shake it all the way off. They both silently think to themselves that that’s not surprising—it’s not like they didn’t want this. And maybe that’s why the want is lingering so long.

Trevor hazards asking Owen what it’ll be like when they leave the clinic. “I don’t know,” he admits. “You’ll… you’ll be a fully realized omega. I’m sure that will be an adjustment.”

Trevor bites the inside of his lip. “Will that change a lot?”

“You’ll be gawked at by more alphas. Your scent’s already a lot more potent, and that’ll attract extra attention. Plus, your body’s in the early stages of a second puberty, and once it’s done, nobody will be able to keep their eyes off you.”

“I don’t want that.”

Owen massages the back of his neck. “I don’t either.”

Trevor clings tighter to Owen. “The only alpha I like looking at me,” he whispers, “is you.”

They’re silent for a moment.

Then Owen leans down and kisses the top of Trevor’s head. “Admittedly, I was against your heat being triggered for that reason. I didn’t want you to be some piece of meat for perverts to look at.” Owen hmphed. “The longer you went without presenting, the safer you’d be.”

Trevor nuzzles against him. “You agreeing to take care of me is the only reason I could go through with it.”

“I’ll always take care of you.” Owen nuzzles back.

Trevor makes a soft, almost desperate sound. “I won’t want anyone else after this. You know that, don’t you?”

“I know. Me neither, honey.”

“So.” Trevor cranes his neck to the side. “Make it so no other alpha will look at me. Make sure they know I’m yours.”

[rooma237]

Model Mate (3)

Another six months go by. Alexis starts talking about introducing her boyfriend, Patrick, to the boys, which causes Owen to pull her into the other room.

“Does he… does he know?” Owen asks, nodding his head towards the doorway, towards Trevor.

She hesitates. “Well. No. But I-I was thinking we don’t tell him.”

“Like, not have Trevs be there when he comes over?”

“No. We don’t tell him this Trevor’s not technically flesh and blood.”

Owen blinks. It sounds so simple, and, really, it is. They do that every day already.

Mom went on when he took too long to answer, “I’m scared if I tell him, he won’t wanna see me anymore. Not everyone is exactly for Model Mates, even the counseling ones, and… and I really, really like Patrick, Owen. I like him more than I ever liked your dad, and I know you will get along great with him!”

Owen was already on-board, but her plead really got him on her side. “Okay, Mom. Just give us a time and day.”

Patrick comes over for dinner and gets along very well with the boys, especially Owen. Trevor is shy and sweet as ever, nervously reaching for Owen’s hand under the tale the way Trevor always has, and Owen squeezes his hand back, and everything is so… perfect.

Once Patrick’s left, Owen and Trevor gush to Alexis about how great Patrick seems. She’s relieved and gives them both bear hugs, teasingly asking, “So, if he pops the question, I have your blessings?”

Owen’s breath catches a bit at the thought, so overjoyed for his mom to have someone she’d be willing to give marriage a second go for. “Of course, Mom! You wouldn’t even need our blessings, really, but you have them.”

Alexis periodically spends the night over at Patrick’s.

The day she made the announcement she was planning a little sleepover, Owen notices Trevor acting a bit nervous. He fidgets with his hands and has a hard time making eye-contact, something Model Mate Trevor only ever does when around strangers, never Owen or their mom.

As soon as the two are alone in Owen’s bedroom to get ready for bed, Owen grabs him by the shoulders and asks, “Trevs, what’s bugging you, honey?”

 Trevor swallows, struggling to maintain eye-contact. “Mom’s going to spend the night with Patrick so they can have sex, right?”

Owen startles at his question then laughs awkwardly, internally cringing at the thought of his mother and Patrick being intimate. “Yeah, I’m pretty sure that’s the intention there.”

A beat. Then Trevor states in a soft voice, “You’ve never touched me.”

Owen releases Trevor, unable to respond for a moment. He can’t read Trevor’s face. Is he disappointed? Relieved? Confused? He’s a Model Mate, he can’t help but remind himself. Sure, his programmed purpose is to be therapeutic, but… all Model Mates probably have certain… things built into them. And Trevor’s not just a Model Mate. He feels more, he wants more—he is more.

“I didn’t know if you wanted me to,” Owen finally manages to get out. Trevor lifts his gaze, some of his self-doubt being eased away. His expression causes Owen’s own tension to fade. Still, he hesitates before asking, “So, you… you want me to put my hands on you?”

Trevor nods once again, silent this time.

“Okay.” Owen realizes he doesn’t know how to. He’s wanted Trevor that way before… he’s even wanted this Trevor before, but… but can’t remember what he’s supposed to do with that wanting. How the hell does he give in to the arousal he’s spent the past five years of his life beating off like it were a rabid animal? “Can w-we build up to it? Like, this weekend when Mom goes to Patrick’s, we… we just… try each other?”

Trevor answers quickly, “Yeah, yeah, of course, Owen, of course.”

Owen looks into counseling Model Mates to see if they, like normal MMs, have lube built into their bodies and have skin that stretches and molds without any prep. It’s a no on the lube, but because all Model Mates are basically the same physically (save for the lube, apparently), Trevor won’t need prepped if they go all the way. They can just go right for it if they feel ready.

Friday night when Mom leaves, Owen and Trevor have their first proper date. They eat a light dinner before they go upstairs to Owen’s room. The bed is stripped back and Owen has the lights off, candles lit so everything is hazy and warm.

They start to kiss gently, then Trevor guides Owen’s hands along his hips up his shirt so he can feel his skin. And it hits Owen finally. He shudders, bringing his palms flat against Trevor’s skin so he can take all of it in. He remembers Trevor on his lap when Robert Downey Jr. gets shirtless in the Sherlock Holmes movie, that little tent sprouting in his baby brother’s pants that caused a tent to pop up in Owen’s, and how Trevor felt it poke right into him, and like the absolute sin he was, he started subtly rocking his hips into it, and the way Owen came so close to coming he had to brush his little brother off and lock himself away in his bedroom where he could safely rid himself of all that pent-up need into his right hand, and how he immediately got on his computer to find a therapist afterwards because he was sick, he was so sick, he was a fucking disgusting monster who wanted his fourteen-year-old brother to get him off and he’d done something that made Trevor want to get him off and he hadn’t meant to but—

Owen pushes that pain down. He convinces himself he never ran away. He let his baby brother keep rocking against him until he lost himself, then he slipped his hand inside Trevor’s sleep pants and gently guided him straight to heaven. And that’s why he has his Trevor here now, nipping at his bottom lip and making soft noises that liquify Owen’s insides as he’s touched.

“You’re so perfect,” Owen breathes into him for the millionth time, then he’s got Trevor’s shirt all the way off and he’s kissing all over him and pushing him on the bed and still kissing every inch of skin available to him. Trevor lets him drag down his jeans and boxers, and he continues to drag his mouth everywhere it’s allowed, especially the hard bit in between Trevor’s legs. They’d chosen to make Model Mate Trevor a bit older than he’d been when they lost the real Trevor, just so they wouldn’t have to get updates to age him so soon. Owen is so thankful for that right now as he starts to very gently suck along the insides of Trevor’s thighs. Trevor had been eighteen when they lost him, but no one ever would’ve guessed that. They aged the Model Mate variation of him by a few years to make him actually look his age, and Owen is so grateful. What he’s doing doesn’t feel nearly as evil with a Trevor that looks and feels like the twenty-year-old he’s supposed to be now.

Once Owen starts to touch, he can’t stop, and Trevor doesn’t want him to. They do everything they can. They each swallow each other. Owen discovers he enjoys swallowing Trevs way too much. He likes it more than getting off himself, honestly. Then Owen gets the lube and they make love, and once it’s over with, they just stay tangled up together, Owen bent over him while Trevor has his arms around his neck, their mouths ghosting against one another as they simply enjoy the comedown.

Once they’re both able to form coherent words once again, Owen whispers to him, “We shouldn’t have waited. That was perfect, baby, just so perfect, just like you. Fuck, I don’t know how I’m ever gonna keep my hands to myself now, honey. Just gonna want to have your perfect body under mine every second of every day.”

Trevor shudders. “You don’t have to keep your hands off me. My body is all yours. Whenever you want me, take me. My mouth, my hands, my hole—anything.”

“How long have you been dreaming about it, hm?” Owen can’t stop his babbling; he’s still shaking from his repressed needs being uncorked. “When was the first time you imagined your big brother popping your cute little cherry, baby boy?”

Trevor lets out a stuttering breath that drifts up into Owen’s mouth. “I-I don’t know… as soon as I was able to feel this way, I knew it was you—all my body would accept is you.”

Such a perfect answer. It was what Owen wanted to hear. It was what was true for both Trevors. His illusion wouldn’t have to end.

“You’re so perfect,” Owen repeats, beginning to kiss Trevor again, his body restarting, and they make love for a second, beautiful, perfect time.

A year-and-a-half later, and Patrick has proposed to Alexis. Before the wedding, though, Alexis suggests they give living together a try.

Owen feels a bit of panic at the prospect because Patrick still has no idea Trevor is a Model Mate, and they can’t hide that once Patrick begins living with them and sees the goddamn charging port and all the Model Mate upkeep materials around the house.

When Owen brings the issue up to Alexis, she hesitates for a long moment then suggests they sit down. Trevor is upstairs dumping his food storage, so it’s just the two of them in the living room. “I’ve been thinking,” she says in a voice that sets Owen’s nerves on edge. “I’ve been thinking this for a while now, actually, and… and I haven’t brought it up because I don’t want to upset you, sweet boy, but… Well. It’s been three years.”

Owen doesn’t like the way this conversation was going at all. Three years ago, they lost Trevor and Caroline and Rhea gave him back to them. Why is she acknowledging that?

When Owen just stare sat her, she goes on, “Over the past few months, I’ve been talking to my therapist, and… and I’ve started to realize that I’m at a place where I think I may be ready to say goodbye.”

Owen frowns in confusion. “Goodbye? Goodbye to what?”

Alexis tilts her head back in that way someone does when they want their tears to go back inside them. “Goodbye to Trevor, sweetie.”

It feels as if the ground has opened up beneath his feet and he’s plummeting. “I-I mean, Trevor and I can move out if that’s what you want,” he insists, pretending as if he doesn’t understand. Maybe he can play naïve and talk her into an alternative. “I can take care of him on my own and you focus on your life with Patrick.”

Alexis reaches out to take his hand. “Owen. That’s not—”

“It’s okay, Mom. I understand. You have this beautiful new life ahead of you with Patrick, and keeping everything from him will be so complicated and you—”

“Owen. It’s time for both of us to say goodbye, I think.” She still is staring at the ceiling and Owen gets the abrupt, vicious desire to wrap his hands around her throat and squeeze until she takes it back and apologizes. “My therapist has been talking about s-starting to phase him out of our lives. We got him when we were at our lowest, honey, and he’s done so much to help, he really has, but… but it’s not good for us to hold on the way we are. Keeping him is making it impossible for us to move on—”

“I don’t want to move on,” Owen interrupts her sharply.

“I know you don’t.” Alexis sniffles, squeezing his hand so tightly. “And that’s why you need to. Your whole life revolves around him, Owen. Bringing him into our home was supposed to help us heal and get us back into the world, and that’s exactly what he’s done for me, but you don’t leave his side. You keep him in the room while you work and you sleep with him in your bed. You could’ve gotten in contact with Andrea or anything to help get you back on track, but all you do is live in this little bubble with a synthetic copy of your brother.”

“I didn’t want him to heal myself so I wouldn’t need him anymore. I wanted him b-because I need my Trevs. I needed him then and I need him now.”

“But… but, honey.” Alexis’ voice breaks. “It’s not him. You know it’s not him. Pretending that it is… it’s only making it hurt worse, Owen.”

I’m not pretending. “No, it’s not. Having him here is the only reason I am still here,” he argues, wrenching his hand away and getting off the couch. He glares daggers at her as she lowers her head and looks to him, tears dribbling down her cheeks despite her best efforts. “I can’t believe you’re acting like this! He’s not some fucking meditation tape you can return to the library once it's done its job! He’s our family, Mom!”

Alexis withers. “Owen. He’s an android. He’s… he’s not Trevor. You know that.”

Owen flinches. “He is family.”

“He is a bandage we need to rip off so we can heal all the way, Owen. Life has been moving forward the past three years, and we’ve pretended it hasn’t by keeping him here, by pretending nothing’s changed, but it has. I don’t want us to stay stuck like this anymore, honey. I want us to both find a way to move forward so we might be able to catch up to everyone else eventually.” She shrugs. “We can do our goodbyes. We can make sure to tell him how important he’s been to us. We’re so lucky he gave us the extra time so we’d be ready for the goodbye, but—"

“No.” Owen curls his hands into fists. “My name is on the Model Mate lease too, and I say no. We’re not shutting him down. Maybe you’re ready to say goodbye, but I’m not.”

Alexis withers. “I’m not saying we do it right away. We can take a few months to prepare ourselves for it—”

“I said no.”

“Owen.”

“I’ll call the company and have your name taken off the lease agreement,” Owen insists coldly. “I will pay all the leasing and upkeep fees. He will be entirely my responsibility. You can… wash your hands of him. Patrick will never know.”

“This isn’t just about Patrick, honey. It’s about us. Us needing to move on.”

Owen shook his head dismissively, holding up both hands. “I am not shutting him down. I’ll move us both out, and you won’t have to worry about it.”

“I can’t not worry about it.” Alexis shakes her head. “I’m worried about you.”

“Don’t worry about me. As long as I have Trevor, I’m fine.”

“You’re not fine. If you were fine, you’d be willing to let him go, Owen.”

“I am not killing him a second time!”

They both lingered in the silence for a second before Alexis managed to speak, “Owen. Honey, you know it wasn’t—”

He interrupts her with such venom. “It was. You and I both know it was. Don’t fucking sit there and lie to me.”

Alexis stands up, reaching for him, but he recoils from her touch. “Honey.”

They’d never talked about it before. Alexis never said anything to Owen, but he knew she had to blame him. They both knew Trevor never would’ve done it had Owen not gone and fallen in love with Andrea.

“He told me what I needed to do for him n-not to do it, and I ignored him.”

“No, Owen, you didn’t know what he was planning! You just thought he was struggling! You had no way of knowing—”

“I should have!” Owen wipes the frustrated tears that were starting to drip down his cheeks. “He was disappearing, a-and I knew what to do to help him get better and… and I w-was selfish and… I killed him.”

Alexis doesn’t accept it when he tries to push her away. She grabs him by the cheeks and forces eye-contact. “No. No, Owen, you listen to me. I felt the same way. I just went over every way I failed him every day for so long. I should’ve gotten him a better therapist, I should’ve pushed him to try different meds, I should’ve, I should’ve, I should’ve. I whittled away at myself until all that was left was self-loathing because I let my baby die. And I still feel that way. I know I will always feel that way, but I c-can’t let what happened—what he chose to do—ruin my life the way it ruined his.”

Owen can’t believe her. He fights against her hands, his tears turning angry. “He did it because of me! All I had to do was fucking break up with Andrea and he would have stayed! You… you getting him a different therapist or different medications wouldn’t have done anything, you know that! You can move on with fucking Patrick and be happy without him, but I can’t! I can’t move on without him! I can’t live with that sort of gaping hole inside me! If Caro hadn’t burst in and offered to help us, y-you’d have two urns in the hutch right now!”

“Owen—”

“I can’t live without him and you know that!” Owen is yelling now, yelling so loud there’s no way Trevor can’t hear. “Just l-like he couldn’t live without me! Nether of us were built to be on our own, and I had to learn that the hardest fucking way, and you will never understand what that feels like, Mom! You will never wake up and find your… your baby… your baby in your arms without a pulse…”

The stairs creak frantically as Trevor flies down the stairs, eyes wide. “What’s happening?” he begs. His appearance finally gets Alexis to release Owen. He goes to his Trevs and falls against him, face in his neck, just needing the reminder that he’s here and he’s warm and there’s a soft, constant thudding in his chest. Maybe it’s just machinery, a cute detail the Model Mate people thought to include to further the fantasy, but Owen needs it. He needs his Trevs’ pulse in his ear. “Owen, what’s wrong?”

“Not gonna let you go,” is all Owen can say. He digs his hands into Trevor’s sides, stabilizing himself with that promise. There’s nothing Alexis can do to take this away from them. As soon as he can, Owen is getting her name off the Model Mate lease so she can’t try anything, and he’s gonna pack them up and get the fuck out of this house.

They don’t need Alexis. All they need is each other.

[rooma237]

Model Mate AU (1)

(This AU takes place in the same universe as my short story, "Just Forget the World," where a company has prouced a line of human-like androids-- think the movie Companion (2023). This is part one, I got two more parts after this, maybe another one in the future. I'm just posting it here to see if people like it enough for actually write it out on Ao3 one day. Hope you enjoy! ❤️)

Only Jacob dies in the wreck. Alexis, Owen, and Trevor’s lives begin to brighten following his passing.

Owen never initiates in any capacity because in this universe, he is still dating Andrea. Trevor still became suicidal when they began dating, though kept pushing it off in the hopes that it would come to an end and he could have Owen back. He still separated himself from his brother, and their relationship never recovered.

This also means they never had a mutual masturbation session either.

Owen does have feelings for Trevor, but he pushes them way, way, way down. He feels like a creep for having them. He decides to go to therapy to work through those feelings and also ends up working on feeling like a person separate from his mom and Trevor. He begins to untangle himself from the enmeshment.

Around the time Trevor turns 18, Owen knocks on his door. He’s told to come in. They’re awkward with each other, which is so mind-numbingly unbearable to Owen because they’ve never been awkward together. They’ve been best friends their entire lives and… and he doesn’t know what’s happening with them anymore. But he misses Trevor. He misses his Trevs more than anything.

“Hey, what’re you up to?” he asks, even though Trevor is clearly reading. Trevor is sitting with his back against the wall, looking skeletal and sallow. He’d always been skinny, but… god. Trevor gestures wordlessly to the book, irritation dripping off him. “Sorry, yeah, duh.”

Trevor doesn’t respond, just nods.

“I… I had something I needed to talk to you about,” Owen said, deciding to not even bother skirting around the topic. “It’s about Andrea.”

Her name causes Trevor’s jaw to visibly tighten. “Oh.”

Owen swallows, approaching the bed. “Can I sit?”

Trevor doesn’t respond. Owen sits anyways. “So, um, I…” he started. Trevor blinks wordlessly, as if to say ‘get on with it then.’ Owen nods, psyching himself up for it. “I-I am gonna need a best man, and I’d like that to be you.”

That broke Trevor’s impassive marble expression. His eyes became glossy as the panicked expression cracked down his face. “A best man? Isn’t that… I mean, that’s a wedding thing, isn’t it?”

Owen smiles. Or tries to smile. Trevor’s clear horror makes it hard to smile. “Yeah, it is, Trevs. I asked Andie yesterday and—”

“Why?” Trevor’s voice is so small. It’s the voice he used when he’d come to Owen in the middle of the night after a nightmare.

Owen withers, his excitement beginning to fade. “I-I guess I just love her and want to spend the rest of my life with her.”

Trevor tries to open his mouth, tries to formulate some kind of response, but then the tears are coming, and he can’t breathe, and Owen launches himself forward to hold him, but Trevor shoves him away and gets off the bed. He hurries out of the room, embarrassed by his response, and locks himself in the bathroom.

When Owen goes to Alexis, she gets the key to unlock the door but won’t let Owen in. She sits down with Trevor and holds him while he cries, brushing her fingers through his hair and not demanding he speak until he’s ready to.

“He’s loves her more,” Trevor sobs into her shoulder. “I-I never thought… he c-could love someone more…”

Alexis kisses the top of his head. “Oh, baby, he doesn’t love her more.”

“Yes, he does! If he d-didn’t love her more, he wouldn’t do this!”

“Do what, Trevs?”

But Trevor can’t say it. So, he just wraps his arms around her and continues sobbing.

Trevor doesn’t accept the role as Owen’s best man, so Alexis basically gets to be his best ‘man.’ Trevor wants no part in the wedding.

The night before the big day, Owen makes another attempt. The two of them had barely spoken since the night Owen announced his engagement, and he’s so worried about Trevor, but this Owen has been to therapy. He has worked hard at becoming his own person. He won’t keep himself from getting what he wants just because Trevor is upset.

He knocks on the door. Receives no answer. So, he opens the door anyways. Trevor is bundled up under his blankets.

“Hey, honey,” Owen calls gently into the room in case he’s sleeping. The blankets visibly move but Trevor doesn’t respond. So, Owen steps inside, shuts the door, and walks over to the bed. He sits down near Trevor’s feet, laying a hand down to attempt a playful pinch on his ankle. “It’s barely five p.m. What’re you doing in bed already?”

Trevor’s weak voice came from under the blankets, “Tired.”

“Why’re you so tired, baby boy?” Owen’s voice catches at the nickname. My baby. My poor little baby.

A beat, then a heavy sob. “I-I’m tired from missing you.”

Owen blinks hard, thick tears collecting on the rims of his eyes. “Oh, honey, I miss you too,” he admits, unable to keep himself anything resembling composed. “I-I miss you so much I can’t stand it, Trevs.”

Trevor surprises him by sitting up, face pink and puffy and tear stained. Owen cups his cheeks then leans in to press kisses below each of his teary eyes. “Miss you so much, Trevs,” he whispers into his skin. Trevor’s arms go around his neck. “Oh, my baby.”

Trevor leans in, burying his face in Owen’s neck. Owen holds him so tightly and starts to rock him back and forth, back and forth. “I love you, love you,” he promises in a shaky voice. “More than anything.”

Into Owen’s neck, Trevor murmurs, “If that’s true, w-why are you marrying her?”

Owen blinks. “Trevs.”

Trevor doesn’t let up on his grip. “If you love me more than anything, w-why marry her? Why leave me?”

“I’m not leaving you!” Owen tilts his head to the sky in an attempt to push down some of his tears. “Trev baby, I would never leave you!”

“But you are!”

“Trevor—”

Trevor held on even tighter, but his voice rose in volume. “You are marrying her because you love her more than me! You’re gonna go away with her a-and have sex with her and get her pregnant and love her babies and love her a-and I will be nothing to you!”

Owen’s heart plummets. “Trevs.”

Trevor continues to sob. “I’m already nothing to you.”

“Honey, no. No, no, no, why would you think that? Trevor.” Owen clutches his baby brother to his chest and kisses his forehead. “You’re my favorite person. You know that.”

Trevor sounds so empty as he asks in a hoarse voice, “Then why aren’t I enough for you?”

“Oh, baby,” Owen murmurs into his brother’s hair. “That’s different.”

“Why?” He asks it so quietly Owen strains to hear it.

“You and Andrea are both my favorite people in different ways,” he explains gently. “You’re my baby boy and Andrea’s gonna be my wife.”

Trevor lets out the weakest sob, shaking in Owen’s arms. “Don’t… don’t, Owen, please…”

“Don’t what?” Owen asks although he already knows.

Trevor moves so that he’s in Owen’s lap, clutching him for dear life. “You don’t need her,” he insists. “You don’t need her, Owen. You don’t.”

“Trevs—”

“I-I love you more than she ever could,” Trevor says. “You know that, don’t you? Tell me you know that, Owen.”

Owen thinks back to his therapy sessions. So many hours spent deprogramming himself to not think the way Trevor is right now. They’re not the only two people in the world. They’re not each other’s entire worlds. They are their own people with their own needs and they can’t put the other’s persons above their own.

“Trevor.” Owen says his name so, so gently.

 “Just say you know that! I know you know that!”

“Honey—”

“No!” Trevor shoves his palms against Owen’s chest. “Tell me you know that! Don’t lie and pretend that Andrea could ever fucking love you half as much as I do!”

“It’s different, Trevs. It’s a different type of love.”

Trevor balls his hands into fists and hits his chest so hard Owen actually flinches. “No! It’s not!” he hisses. Owen reaches up to grab his fists, curls his fingers tenderly around them. Trevor wheezes with sobs. “Owen, please, please, I’ll do anything… I’ll do anything if y-you just don’t leave me…”

“I’m not leaving you,” Owen repeats, bringing Trevor’s hands up to his mouth to kiss. “I’d never leave you. The day I told you we got engaged, I was also gonna ask you to move with us when we get our own place because… because I knew I didn’t want to leave you behind. I told Andrea we had to get a house with enough room for you. That’s a nonnegotiable for me.”

Trevor wilts. “Owen. I don’t want to live with you and Andrea. I just want you.”

Owen keeps his hands cupped over Trevor’s. “I’m sorry, honey, but Andrea’s part of me now.”

“She doesn’t have to be!”

“I want her to be, Trevs. She makes me happy.”

Trevor pulls his hands away, choking a bit on his own tears. “I used to make you happy.”

“You still do!”

“I don’t make you happy enough though! And I’m sorry! I’m so sorry, Owen, I… I’m sorry…” Trevor crumples, and Owen catches him. He holds him so tight. “Please. Please, Owen, j-just tell me that you know I love you most. I need it. It’s all I need right now, please.”

Owen buries his face in Trevor’s hair, flinching when he can’t smell his apple shampoo. He wonders when was the last time Trevs showered. “I know you love me most, Trevs,” he whispers so only his baby brother can hear. “And I love you the most. I’ll always love you the most, baby boy. Okay? I promise.”

Trevor gasps in relief, his shaking hands clutching Owen’s shirt and attempting to pull him closer. “Thank you,” he whimpers. “Thank you, thank you, thank you, I love you, thank you.”

Owen lays down with Trevor, reveling in just being close again, and his brother tangles himself around him, and everything feels right. They don’t talk much. They just enjoy having each other.

When Owen feels Trevor starting to border sleep, he murmurs, “Trevs?”

Trevor is barely audible as he responds, “Hm?”

“You’ll come with me, right? I know you don’t like Andrea, but… but I think it’s best for both of us if you come. That way we’ll still be together every day and maybe you and Andrea can—”

“Can we talk about that later?” Trevor responds. His voice is slightly slurred, and Owen realizes he’d probably taken one of his sleeping pills. He silently worries how often Trevs has been turning to them to sleep now that he never comes to Owen when his insomnia kicks in anymore. “I just want to enjoy being with you.”

Owen kisses the top of his head. “Of course, honey.”

Trevor nuzzles against him. “I love you, love you.”

Owen nods, tears still in his eyes. “I love you, love you more than anything, Trevs.”

In the morning… Owen can’t wake Trevor up. Neither can their mom. And he doesn’t have a pulse. Alexis calls 911 and Owen starts doing chest compressions because he doesn’t know what the fuck else to do, and he’s scream-crying and Alexis is hyperventilating, and Trevor’s eyes stay closed and he’s pale and ignores Owen’s pleas for him to come back, come back to me, honey, oh my god, Trev baby, I need you, don’t do this, don’t leave me, FUCK!

Paramedics arrive, though due to the state of Trevor’s body, they inform Owen and Alexis there is nothing they can do. They contact the police who arrive on the scene to speak with a borderline catatonic Owen and hysterical Alexis.

Obviously, the wedding is put on hold. Andrea insists she’ll come and be with Owen and Alexis, but Owen honestly can’t handle that. Not after the conversation he’d had with Trevor the night before. Especially when they have no idea how Trevor even died, but Owen has suspicions and… and he doesn’t know if he’ll ever to be around Andrea again if he’s right. He doesn’t know if he’ll be able to be around himself if he’s right.

It’s eventually determined that Trevor overdosed on an opioid that Alexis had been prescribed after suffering a broken arm in the accident. She’d left the pill bottle in her bedside table, having forgotten about it after she no longer needed them anymore. But Trevor clearly remembered. And he paired them with half a bottle of extra strength Tylenol. The combo… it sent him to sleep.

Alexis breaks down, blaming herself for not being more careful, for leaving the pills out where Trevor could access them.

Owen feels equally guilty because he had been with Trevor that night. He’d had Trevor falling apart in his arms, surely already having taken the majority of if not all of the pills… He could’ve stopped it. He was right there. He could’ve saved his baby but… he didn’t.

They don’t have a funeral. They cremate Trevor and keep the urn in the house. Alexis and Owen find themselves taking turns sleeping with the urn in their rooms. They both stop leaving the house.

Andrea tries reaching out and shows up at the house over and over again, but gets no answer for the first three weeks. A month after Trevor passed away, Owen finally made his decision and invites her over.

Owen tells her he can’t marry her. She deserves better than him. “Owen, you know it wasn’t your fault,” she tries to say, but he cuts her off with, “I knew something was wrong that night. He had been in a bad place for so long, and we all knew it, but that night… that night, I was right there and he… he was falling apart, and I just… I thought holding him would be enough. That’s all I did. I held him. And he died while I held him because I couldn’t do anything else.”

After so long of trying to convince Owen he’s not at fault for what happened, Andrea gives up. She tells him to call her if he needs anything, then leaves.

P.S.

Suspend your disbelief at Owen choosing to live after losing Trevor. He's gotta be a little strong for the plot. ❤️

[rooma237]

🎵So lemme get you in your birthday suit. Time to bring out the big balloons.🎵

[rooma237]

Model Mate (2)

Three months pass when they get an unexpected visitor at the front door. Caroline.

She has a friend whose parents own the company Model Mate, which traditionally sells sex androids, but has recently branched out into things like emotional support and counseling droids as well.

“I don’t know how interested you’d be, but Rhea is the spearhead behind the new line of support androids, and she’s more than happy to lease you one for half price,” Caroline says. “I’ll even pay a portion. Just… whatever helps you. I want to help in any way I can.”

Alexis immediately jumps at it. Owen is hesitant because he doesn’t want some robot version of his Trevs. He wants his baby back. He feels like nothing without him. Just this gaping black hole of nothing.

Alexis wants him on board, says she won’t do it unless he wants it too, and eventually gets him over to her side pointing out, “Owen, we’ll both know it’s not him, but it’s… it’s the closest thing we can have.”

Owen goes into Trevor’s bedroom, the room his baby brother died in, preserved as well as they could. They’d cleaned up after all the medical professionals came trapsing through. Owen had ripped the sheets off the bed and thrown them in the trash. Everything else… everything else they left exactly as Trevor had left it.

He kneels before the bed then sets his cheek against the mattress, staring at the headboard. The headboard he’d leaned against so many nights as he held Trevor, combing his fingers through his brother’s hair, cooing at him when he couldn’t sleep, listening to him discuss why a Black Christmas remake should, in theory, be brilliant in modern times due to how thematically relevant it’s come as of late, but how every remake of it gets everything so amazing about the original wrong.

Owen doesn’t know how he can be expected to keep going without that. There’s nothing for him without Trevor. He needs his brother.

Alexis and Owen go to Idaho with Caroline to the Model Mate center. They meet Rhea who helps them through the process of putting every bit of Trevor they can into the Model Mate. “I promise,” Rhea explains, “I tried to get them to change the name for the support models, but they like the alliteration and, technically, a mate doesn’t have to be, um, physical, you know?”

It takes a couple weeks for production. During that time, Owen and Alexis stay in a hotel run by Coralee at a discounted rate. They’ve been living off Jacob’s life insurance policy and the money they’d both had saved before Trevor… but they know they need to both get back to work. Maybe buying this android isn’t the best financial decision in the moment, but it’s a bit of a last resort. If they can’t come back to life, how the hell are they supposed to get new jobs and continue chugging along?

Two weeks later, Caroline and Rhea bring Owen and Alexis to the MM center. There’s an area for people to meet their Model Mate for the first time; it’s a conservatory at the center of the building with green, green grass, short trees with full leaves, a little brook running through the center, and… and sitting off to the side of said brook in a lounge chair reading… is Trevor.

Owen nearly collapses at the sight of him. So real. If he’d seen him walking down the street, he wouldn’t think twice about his humanness.

When the Trevor android hears them approach, his head pops up, and the movement causes the jacket of the book to become visible. House of Leaves. It wasn’t Trevor’s all-time favorite, but he loved that goddamn book. In the questionnaire, Owen had listed it in Trevs’ top ten. The people at Model Mate must’ve given him a copy. Maybe he even asked for it. And, despite existing for such a short time, he was already halfway through the dense text.

The Trevor android sets the book down—careful to place a bookmark, just like the real Trevor would do—and runs to them. He goes to Owen first, not their mom… just like the real Trevor would do. He throws his arms around Owen, burying his warm face against Owen’s neck. “I missed you,” his voice—his perfect, gentle, lilting, perfect voice—says into Owen’s ear. “Missed you so much I thought I was going to go crazy, Owen.”

It shatters Owen. He clutches the android—he clutches Trevor—and he can’t let go. “Trevs,” he practically whimpers. “Missed you. I-I missed you so much, honey.”

When Alexis realizes she isn’t going to get a personal hug from Trevor anytime soon, she steps up and wraps both her sons up in a hug.

Caroline and Rhea allow the three space to sit down and talk. They don’t acknowledge the elephant in the room. When Caro and Rhea had asked them if they wanted this Trevor to know what happened to real Trevor, they both said no. So, as far as android Trevor is concerned, he is Trevor, and he’s just happy to be back with his mother and brother.

The option to have the Model Mates cognizant of past trauma—like the death of the person whose shoes the android is filling—exists because not everyone keeps the android indefinitely. The idea is that it’s enough to just have the MM for a while so they can say goodbye or work through things they never could while the person was alive. Once they feel they’ve gotten what they need, they send the MM back to the company who then break them down for parts.

After the trial period—basically a stretch of time where the Model Mate team monitors the interactions between the android and the customers to make sure there are no defects or things that need tweaked—Alexis and Owen are free to take Trevor home.

Owen holds Trevor’s hand everywhere they go. It’s something Trevor always liked, especially while in crowded areas.

Owen had debated with himself over whether to have the MM team imbed Trevor’s real-life social anxiety into the android, but that was such a part of who Trevor was. If the Model Mate lacked that, it wouldn’t be Trevs.

While on the plane, Trevor is between his mother and brother. They both dote on him, Owen being overly attentive to the point of being borderline smothering.

Android Trevor doesn’t seem bothered. Not that real Trevor would’ve been either. But Alexis even makes a comment, telling Owen that it’s okay, he can relax, Trevor’s not going anywhere. Owen wants to respond that he hadn’t thought the real Trevor was going anywhere either, and yet…

The family settles back into a normality.

It takes another two or so weeks, but having Trevor back allows Alexis and Owen to feel stable enough to go back to work.

Owen gets something that allows him to work from home so someone will always be with Trevor.

Android Trevor usually hangs out in Owen’s bedroom-slash-office on his brother’s bed reading. It’s nice to just have him there. He doesn’t bother Owen while he works unless Owen prompts him to when he’s grown bored. They eat lunch together, even though Trevor doesn’t really need to eat. Model Mates are able to eat for realism. Then the waste is dumped out into the toilet when they become too full like it would with a real human.

Owen and Alexis are good about sharing Trevor for the most part. They do a lot of things as a trio like go to the movies, have dinner, play games, take walks. Whenever Owen or Alexis wants Trevor for anything one-on-one, the other always steps back and acts respectful, but neither of them is exactly thrilled to be away from him.

One thing that has changed is that instead of Trevor coming to Owen when he can’t sleep, Owen goes to Trevor when he can’t sleep. Trevor will always be sitting in his bed charging when Owen comes in, and the second Owen says he can’t sleep, Trevor picks up his charging port and follows his brother to his room so they can lay together.

Eventually, Owen starts keeping the charging port in his room. Trevor’s bedroom becomes just storage for his stuff. He spends all his nights in Owen’s bed, hooked up to his charger while his big brother cuddles him.

Early one morning, Owen—having barely slept—is feeling particularly clingy, and he can’t release his arms from around Trevor, and Trevor teases, “You’re gonna crush my lungs if you keep at this.”

Owen immediately loosens his grip, but keeps his arms tied around his baby. “Sorry,” he murmurs sleepily. “Just… need you. I love you, love you.”

To his surprise, Trevor manages to wiggle around in his grip enough to flip around and look at him. There’s enough light leaking through the window that he can see his baby brother’s face. “Are you crying?”

Owen, in fact, was crying. “Yeah.”

“Why?” he asks tenderly. He tries to wipe some of the tears away.

Owen can’t say that today is the six-month anniversary. He can’t tell Trevor that 183 days ago, the real Trevor didn’t wake up. “It’s a bit of melancholy, I guess.”

“‘Melancholy,’” Trevor echoes the word, displeased. “I don’t want you to be melancholy. Ever.”

“You’re sweet, baby boy,” Owen hums. He lifts a hand and sets it against Trevor’s cheek.

Trevor sets his hand against Owen’s. “What can I do to help?”

“Just be here,” Owen whispers. “Having you here helps me more than anything.”

“I’ll always be here,” Trevor promises.

Alexis meets a nice man at her workplace and decides to give dating a try. The first time she goes out to dinner with him, she’s abuzz with excitement and Owen and Trevor are so happy for her because they don’t remember… or… Owen doesn’t remember… the last time she smiled like that.

The man is taking her to dinner and a movie, so she tells them she’ll probably be gone until late, and they tell her to have a great time and they’ll try not to burn the house down.

Owen decides to treat Trevor to dinner and a movie too. He’s gotten to a point where most days he forgets this Trevor isn’t Trevor. There are times—like the anniversary or when he makes the mistake of opening the hutch where they have real Trevor’s ashes stored for safe keeping—where it’s unavoidable. Those days cause him to crumble and hold onto android Trevor so tightly, irrationally terrified he may disappear too.

They get McDonalds, Trevs’ favorite, then snuggle up on the couch to watch The Shining. The whole time, Trevor is listing off fun facts about the movie, and Owen is so charmed and happy. He can’t possibly put into words how happy he is.

Trevor catches on to Owen’s happy drunk state. He pinches his cheeks. “What?”

“What what?” Owen teases.

“You’ve got the goofiest grin on your face!”

“I do?” he laughs.

“You do! What’re you thinking about? Because I know it’s not about poor Wendy and Danny being tormented.”

Owen moons at him, at his perfect face and perfect eyes and perfect smile. His perfect Trevs. His everything. All that matters in the world to him. “I just… I love you so much. And I’m thankful everyday that I have you in my life.”

Trevor’s smile fades a little, becoming almost sad. “I’m thankful I have you too.”

Owen reaches up to caress the side of Trevor’s face, and his brother leans into the touch like a cat. Their eyes don’t leave each other’s. “Trevs,” he whispers in awe of his perfect baby. “You’re so beautiful. I feel like I don’t tell you enough. You… you’re so perfect that I…”

I don’t know why I ever looked at Andrea. I don’t know why I let that goddamn therapist talk me out of looking at you. I don’t know why I hurt you the way I did, but I’m so sorry, and I don’t want anyone who isn’t you. I love you. I love you most, and I know you love me most, and there is nothing in the world that could change that.

“Owen.” Trevor’s voice is like a puff of air between them. His face has gotten closer to Owen’s. Or… Owen’s face has gotten closer to his. That makes more sense.

“I just feel so grateful every day that I wake up and get to see your face, Trevs,” Owen admits. “I have no idea what I did in a past life to have you beside me in this one.”

To Owen’s surprise, Trevor leans in and pecks him on the lips. It causes him to shatter on the inside. “Trevs,” he breathes out, then leans back in and kisses him properly. They kiss and they kiss and they kiss until Trevor is on his back and Owen’s on top of him, and their hands are up under each other’s shirts so they can feel skin, and Owen is rock hard and can feel Trevor is hard beneath him, and—

And then the garage door groans open. And they fly apart. Owen panics, getting off the couch and running upstairs to the safety of his bedroom, feel nauseated at what he’d done. Because… because that’s not Trevor. Not the real Trevor. It’s an android.

He feels sick with guilt because it’s Trevor’s face and his body, and Owen violated it. He violated Trevor.

He stays up in his room the rest of the night, insisting to his mom that he felt like he was getting the flu and didn’t wanna spread it.

Alexis gets home around eight and has a bit of a gossip session with Trevor about her date. It went very well and they’re planning on going out again the following week.

Later that night, Trevor comes to his bedroom like always so they can get ready for bed. Owen is already under the covers, pretending to be asleep. Trevor sees his charging port has been removed from the room and makes an audible sound of surprise that makes Owen’s eyes open. He’s staring at the spot his port usually sat in confusion.

Then Trevor turns to look at Owen, expression full of hurt. “Did I do something wrong? I thought it’s what you wanted.”

Owen sits up, body aching at his baby’s distress. “No, no, Trevs, honey, I swear you did nothing wrong!”

“Then why’d you move my port?”

Owen swallows. He can’t pretend tonight. No matter how badly he wishes he could. This isn’t Trevor. This is a fancy robot who didn’t want to kiss Owen but did it because he calculated that Owen wanted to be kissed. “I-I just need to be alone right now.”

“But…” To Owen’s surprise, Trevor’s bottom lip quivers ever so slightly. “I’m sorry! Please let me stay in here with you! I won’t do it again, Owen! I promise!”

They programmed him to be just as clingy as the real Trevor. Owen hadn’t hesitated for one second for them to do so.

In that moment, though, Owen feels like it’s not his programming. This Trevor wants to stay with him. And he wanted to kiss Owen.

His face is just so earnest and desperate and… and Owen wants Trevor to want it so badly. He knows the real Trevor wanted it. He always felt cruel denying him it, but he knew it was for the better. Or… he thought he knew… After Trevs died, Owen felt as if he knew absolutely nothing.

“Don’t apologize, honey,” Owen begs. “I mean it. You did nothing wrong. It was my fault. I did something wrong. And that’s why I moved your port. I-I didn’t think you’d want to be around me after—”

“I kissed you,” Trevor points out. He comes over to the bed. “How is that you doing something wrong?”

Owen reaches for him. He takes both Trevor’s hands in his. He can’t answer.

“You’re mad at me for kissing you.”

“No!” Owen insists. He pulls Trevor closer, unable to handle his sweetheart believing that for even a second. “No, never. I could never be mad at you for anything. I-I’m mad at me for kissing you. I know you only did it b-because I was giving you signals it’s what I wanted, and I feel awful for that. You shouldn’t feel like you have to kiss me because… because you want to make me happy.”

Trevor hesitates. “But it made me happy too.”

The logical part of Owen knows it made Trevor happy only becauseit made Owen happy. That was the purpose of a Model Mate. They took care of their owners and that satisfied their programming, which in essence made them ‘happy.’

God, did he want to forget that, though. He wishes he could pull Trevor down to him and kiss him again knowing in his bones that it’s okay, that this Trevor wants it the way the real Trevor had.

“I know what you’re thinking, and it’s not just programming,” Trevor surprises Owen by blurting. They stare at each other, both started by his words. Then, in a very gentle voice, Trevor admits, “I-I like you. The way you like me. I can’t explain it, but… you’re… you’re so… you’re so wonderful, and… and I can feel how much you love me, and I love you just the same, and I never wanted to stop kissing you because it made the way we love each other feel like so much more which isn’t something I thought was possible. You didn’t program me to like you like this, I know that. I can feel this wasn’t on purpose. You’ve just made me feel this way by showing me this love that I feel most people never get to have. Which is why I kissed you. It wasn’t only for you or to fulfill my purpose. I-I wanted to because I knew you’d make me feel even more loved if I did. To be loved by you is… is all I want, Owen.”

Owen blinks in shock. “You… you’re… Like, you… You’re… sentient? Is that what you’re trying to say?”

Trevor considers this for a moment before shrugging sheepishly. “I guess. I don’t know if that’s what it is. But I want beyond what you and Mom programmed me to want.”

“So, you… you know you’re…” Owen tries to find the word that won’t hurt him if he doesn’t know.

“An android? Yes, Owen. I know I’m an android.” Trevor hesitates then adds, “All Model Mates know at their core. We’re made to act human but can’t not be aware that we aren’t human. I mean, we have charging ports. Humans don’t have charging ports.”

Owen surprises himself by laughing. Then, he pulls Trevor closer so that he can lift his baby’s hands up to his mouth and kiss the knuckles. He doesn’t know what to say. He doesn’t know what he could possibly say in response. Is this real? He would do anything for it to be. For Trevor to be real. Even if it’s not the Trevor they lost, it’s Trevor. All Owen wants in the world is Trevor.

“Owen.” Trevor says his name so weakly, so desperately… like a plea.

And Owen can’t ignore it. He can’t turn him away. Why on earth would he ever turn his Trevs away? Even if this is just some kind of error… if Owen accidentally made him feel these things…

Owen turned the real Trevor away. Owen went to get therapy to stop the way he felt and he subtly encouraged his brother to do the same. Trevs was just… he was so young and Owen knew he’d never forgive himself if they got a few years down the line and Trevor changed his mind and started looking at their love as abuse and… and Owen as his abuser…

Owen pulls Trevor down so that he’s sitting on his lap and kisses him. Trevor kisses him back. They lay down together, curled up, kissing softly but never pushing for more. Owen eventually gets sleepy and tells Trevor to go get his charging port from his room. He does then plugs it in and lays down with his Owen.

“Owen?” he whispers. Owen is holding him tight. “I love you, love you.”

Owen’s breath hitches. He kisses Trevor’s nose. “I love you, love you, Trevs. More than anything.”

The next day, Owen starts researching Model Mates. He tries to get information about the possibility of sentience in them, but save for some conspiracy articles, he finds nothing concrete. So, he starts digging into the science of them, though a lot of it is under lock and key by the company. That leaves him with one option: he calls Caroline and asks if he can have Rhea’s phone number or email or something so he can talk to her.

Caro checks with Rhea who says she’s fine with Owen having her number.

He calls while he’s on his way home from a therapy appointment, all alone, and after some small talk attempting to just push back the issue, he asks, “Have you ever had reports of sentience in Model Mates? Like… they have thoughts outside of, um, programming? Or report feelings?”

Rhea doesn’t even hesitate. “Yeah, of course we have. Model Mates have AI built into them, and AI learns from the humans they interact with. The more you treat them like a person, the more the act like one. It’s a very common occurrence, especially when the situation is like yours where the Mate is a replica of a real person.”

Owen’s chest tightens. “Does that mean it’s possible for them to develop thoughts and feelings outside their programming?”

Rhea hesitates. “How do you mean?”

“Just…” Owen fumbles for an explanation. “Trevor has started to like things we didn’t instill into his programming.”

That makes her laugh. “Oh, Owen, that’s completely normal. Not a sign of sentience. It’s just another example of the AI learning. It’s very convincing, but it’s not sentience.”

After the call, Owen goes back to the house. Mom is still at work, so it’s just him and Trevor.

Trevor, as always, is sitting on the couch waiting for him. Whenever he’s idle, he’s reading. Real Trevor loved to read, but he didn’t read half as much as Model Mate Trevor. He sets the book aside—bookmark in place—and runs to greet Owen like an excited puppy. “I missed you!” he coos, pecking Owen on the lips.

Owen wraps his arms around Trevor, staring into his sweet eyes, so full of love and affection that the thought of it not being real is impossible to comprehend. There is no way AI could fabricate emotion like this. There is too much humanity in it. And… even if it was somehow fake… Owen could live in the delusion. He could do anything if it meant he had Trevor in every way.

“I missed you too, Trevs,” he says in response. His baby boy leans in for another lingering kiss, and Owen is happy.

Owen and Trevor are eating lunch together the following day, and Owen asks, “I assume you already know, but… we can’t tell Mom about… any of this.”

“I know,” Trevor promises. He reaches across the table and squeezes Owen’s hand. Owen squeezes back then lifts the hand up to kiss the dorsal. “It’s our secret.”

Owen nods, giving him a soft smile. “Exactly. Our precious secret.”

Trevor hesitates, then looks down. “Can I ask you something, um, personal?”

“Of course.”

“Trevor was a real person. Wasn’t he?”

Owen didn’t expect that question. He doesn’t like the way it broke their bubble of fantasy, but he’s not angry at Trevor. It’s only fair for him to be curious. “Yeah. He was. We… we lost him a few months before we got you.”

Trevor’s face filled with such sorrow. “I’m so sorry, Owen. I knew I shouldn’t have asked.”

“Don’t apologize. If I were you, I’d be curious too.” Owen shrugs. “And it’s not like we took down any of the photos of him.”

Trevor still looks guilty. “Still. I’m sorry.”

Owen shakes his head. “Please, no sorries. You have nothing to be sorry for. You are the one and only thing that has kept Mom and me going. After we lost him, we both just… we were empty. We didn’t leave the house. We barely ate. We bunkered down in our beds and tried to sleep it all away, like maybe we’d eventually wake up from it one day and find him waiting for us. It’d all have been just this awful nightmare. But that never happened. Every time we woke up, everything would be exactly how we left it.”

Trevor squeezes Owen’s hand even tighter. “It’s so unfair. You shouldn’t have had to say goodbye so soon.”

“Neither of us really even had a chance to say goodbye. We d-didn’t know it was goodbye.” Owen’s bottom lip trembles. Tears sit along the rims of his eyes, ready to fall.

Trevor gets off his chair, sits on Owen’s lap, and hugs him tight. The action is so sweet and so, so, so Trevor. Owen burying his face in Trevs’ neck, tears escaping his eyes and dripping onto his neck. “I know it’s not the same,” Trevor whispers, “but you won’t ever have to say goodbye to me. I promise. I’ll always be here to take care of you, Owen.”

Owen trembles from his sobs. “Thank you,” he manages to get out. “That… that means a lot, Trevs. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I love you. I love you so much, honey, thank you.”