tobio kageyama x gn!reader
content - angst, established ish relationship, possible breakup, ambiguous ending, lack of communication (bad), slight oc characterisation - snake divider by @/saradika
words - 700
reputation event masterlist
♡—you've been dating for almost 6 months, so why won't he just let you help him? why won't he talk to you for gods sake!
Tobio Kageyama is the type of guy that has trouble asking for help—whether it stems from someone in his childhood who always insisted he be the best, or from some later wound that he still doesn't have a name for. Not that it mattered to him. He's perfectly able, and willing, to push through on his own, forging his own way by fire and ice, not caring for the after affects that his own self confidence—or self destruction—could have. There's no need to bother voicing what he can only assume is a stupid question, letting himself get ridiculed and mocked, only to not even get a straight solution to his problem. No, he could get it solved himself, no help necessary.
And that was just something you'd have to get used to.
And you have, you've gotten very used to it. You try and try and try to help him, to offer what you think he might need, to fill in the gaps as best you can without so much as a word from the man himself. But it's tiring. And you're too exhausted.
“Tobio, please, just… talk to me.” It's a fool's game, asking him to let you in, but you refuse to give up. Always thinking that next time he'll ask for help, next time he'll let you in, let you past those final few walls.
It's not as though he point blank refuses your help when you offer. But it's hard to offer help when you don't know what he needs. Advice? A solution? Just an ear to listen? If he would only tell you.
“It's not a big deal. I'm fine.” He says, face blank and eyes refusing to meet your gaze.
You sigh. You thought… you really did… you thought he was getting better, that the two of you were getting better. You thought that he knew he could be open with you, vulnerable with you, and that there would be no negative reactions, no snide remarks or exaggerated eye rolls. You've both spoken about your teen years, and what it was like for you growing up, it's typical getting to know someone stuff, you've shared and listened to whatever Tobio gave you.
You sigh again, shallower this time—defeated. You and Tobio have been dating for almost 5 months now. Christ, you've even got plans for him to meet your family at the end of month, properly meet them, not just a quick hello and goodbye, but dinner plans. And jokes. And chatting. And not just your parents either, but your brother, and his girlfriend too, and your cousin! Maybe that would help… seeing you laughing and talking and sharing with your family.
But then again, maybe it wouldn't.
“I think…” You cough, and it's loud enough to grab Tobio’s attention, finally. He's looking at you, really, actually looking at you. “I think I'm just gonna go.”
You stand up, heading for his front door. You gather up your things quickly, putting your coat and gloves on to protect yourself from the painful chill that awaits you on the other side of the door. You turn to face Tobio, your navy coloured left hand is gripping the door handle, and a sudden chill strikes him, although the door still remains shut.
He thinks you've never looked as far away as you do right now. And have your eyes always had that harshness to them when you looked at him? That coldness shivers through him again.
“Goodbye, Tobio.” You turn and leave and he watches as the door clicks behind you.
The air feels so thick with fear that he could almost swallow it.
Wait…
He doesn't want the question to surface, he does everything he can to stop the thought from intruding into the forefront of his mind. He thinks of home, he thinks of what it's like to fly across a dark sky with nothing but the sound of silence as company, he thinks of cookies, he thinks of his mothe—
Is that the last time I'll ever hear you say my name?
