∞ all them texts bich ∞
Send “✆” for a MORNING text.
[ text ➙ dom ]: either this is your silk stocking on my kitchen counter, or i’ve begun sleepwalking in style. either would be reasonable options, but i have a hard time believing i’d only wear one silk stocking at a time.
Send “✉” for a text that WASN’T SENT.
[ unsent text ➙ dom ]: [IMAGE REDACTED][ text ➙ dom ]: please tell me i cancelled that last message in time.
Send “☎” for a RUSHED text.
[ text ➙ dom ]: i’m on the mayor’s boat, come quick[ text ➙ dom ]: let me clarify. mayor isn’t here. quickly.
Send “⁇” for a DRUNK text.
[ text ➙ dom ]: i am gonna call you DAISY fromm now on and ther is nothing you can do to stop me. i wanna drown in the pool of your EYES baby
Send “✿” for a SUGGESTIVE text.
[ text ➙ dom ]: Just so that we aren’t under any illusions, I leave the light on as an invitation. It may not be a green light on a far-away dock, but the sentiment stands. And by that, I mean that you’d have to do very little work at all. A woman like you should never have to. And I am a very hard worker.
Send “ø” for a LATE NIGHT text.
[ text ➙ dom ]: Do you think it’s too plebeian to be considering drinking Fireball? Who am I? Put me out of my misery.
Send “✘” for a HATEFUL text.
[ text ➙ dom ]: No, I will not take a line with you in the bathroom, of all places. Do I look like a Kardashian?
Send “#” for a RANDOM text.
[ text ➙ dom ]: I want another tattoo on my ass. Perhaps the Dean’s face. He’s so ugly.
Send “@” for a SCARED text.
[ unsent text ➙ dom ]: I feel my father may truly do it this time. The last time I was here, I saw him standing in the corner of his study, looking down upon a picture of my mother and myself, clutching a glass decanter as if he wished to smash it over the photo frame. His knuckles were white; when I called out to him, he turned and raised it, completely wild-eyed. I couldn’t decide if I’d frightened him, if he was drunk, or if for a moment he really thought that he could be rid of his greatest failure. Or perhaps I was drunk. It was likely all of the above. Ah - I don’t know why I’m telling you this. Perhaps I’d like for you to write a screenplay about my untimely murder when [ text ➙ dom ]: Oh, fuck. I lost my tie clip. It was a gift from my father. I think he really may kill me for this one.
Send “&” for a LOVING text.
[ text ➙ dom ]: Never was there a woman more worth drowning for. Daisy is nothing. You, my dear, are everything.
Send “%” for a CURIOUS text.
[ text ➙ dom ]: Is that lace I see? Give me a little peek - I’m just across the courtyard.
Send “ツ” for an EXCITED text.
[ text ➙ dom ]: The red convertible by the curb outside your window -- tell me who you see in the driver’s seat. [ text ➙ dom ]: I can SEE your silhouette through the glass, you need to COME LOOK[ text ➙ dom ]: It’s ME! Your old Harry. Finally in a convertible. Would you judge me if I cried? Would you judge me if I CONTINUED TO TYPE IN ALL CAPS? [ text ➙ dom ]: If you’re not down here with that little beret of yours in thirty seconds, I am breaking into song WITHOUT YOU
Send “$” for an ACCIDENTAL text.
[ text ➙ dom ]: this is the fifth goddamn sex dream i’ve had about her in a week. i think i may throw myself off the veranda. [ text ➙ dom ]: and by her, my dear bunny, i mean helen mirren. you understand.
Send “♀” for a HEARTBREAKING text.
[ text ➙ dom ]: I’m leaving Providence, I’m afraid. Father, you understand. Too many gory details for a text message. I suppose I’ll have to tell you in another life. But I’ll leave the light on in the window until the landlord fills the un-fillable void that I’ve left behind. Another life, my dear Daisy. One very soon, I hope.