I have said it SO MANY TIMES and I will SAY IT AGAIN.
AS A DOM. YOU DESERVE CARE TOO.
aftercare is often times sub-focused, and while that’s always great, it’s often seen as “only subs need aftercare because they’re the ones that took the brunt of the acts.” and as a disabled dom, that’s absolutely not true.
dom drop is very real. I often experience it as guilt for hurting someone, or being “too aggressive,” as trans women are often seen. especially for doms that take care of subs, pretty please take the time to take care of yourself too!!
and for all the subs out there, if you’re able, please please please go get your dom some water or a snack. even if neither of you can walk, it’s imperative that you *talk to each other.* in my past, even the smallest things made me feel so much better. I’m going to list off some great things to say to your dropped dom here (feel free to add in reblogs!!)
“I’m okay. You didn’t hurt me too much.”
“Thank you for doing (self care act) for me, do you need anything?”
“I liked everything you did.”
“everything was within my boundaries.”
“you did great, (name/nickname).”
“do you need anything?”
“would you like (self care act)?”
“can I help (task: clean up, get water, etc.)”
just doing something like talking, showing physical affection, kisses, comfort, etc, is so so so important, and everyone deserves it!
and to all my fellow doms out there, don’t feel guilty for asking for help! if you need it, ask for it! your partner is there to show you love and care too!
