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Last night I was going to post some pics of myself
like for weight loss inspiration I do this thing where I photoshop myself thin because I'm sad like that, and It was a big step to post what I look like on my tumblr even if its edited, but for the first time in forever tumblr was not working and it said "we're making some changes so posting and reblogging have been disabled"
as this was like 2:30 AM I took it as a sign not to get ahead of myself and more importantly that I don't have to share things in my life for internet attention. As much as I want it sometimes. So I'm not gonna do it anymore but seriously the story is worth repeating. That's just how the world works for me, nothing is simple, nothing goes easily and works out good.
I just wanna be skinny and be appreciated for looking okay. But photoshop is a lie, but it would give me that effect imediately instead of years from now. I just want to have some part of my life decently constructed and set up and going well. My living space, my style and health, my job, my money, one of those pleasee. BUt no everything has to be falling apart.