#same shit.

[cacaitos]

unlike satou, somehow

[traumatikyuu]

it's... surprisingly easy to forget abuse when it isnt happening

[eyejstwnt]

reality tv stars just well paid dumbasses, ppl still look up to em tho.

[zopilote--machine-blog]

[araneusoscorpeus-speedusforceus]

Same old same old.

Nothing changed, not a lot.

[hannahclaired-blog]

okay, i'm sorry for all this talk about it, but it's acting up and scaring me. i took my .5 mg for the night. i'm just hoping it will knock me out soon :/ 

this is so goddamn shitty. i want to be okay again. i want to go to work without being scared i might start panicking and i want to meet up with ray after and smoke bowls till i'm in my happy place and then chain smoke cigarettes. but i can't because weed hypes the panic, cigarettes hype the panic. 

the doctor, my mom, and a life-time anxiety sufferer all have told me that i'm fine, it's just panic. I won't die. but every time my heart clenches up, i'm convinced it's the end. I think tomorrow if i'm still feeling bad, I want to go to a doctor and have him tell me everything that i'm paranoid about is irrational. i've been failing for the past 4 days to outsmart my freaking out brain. 

i don't know. i'm getting drained from all of this. please just subside so i can start trying to better my mental health. i can't do it when you keep my brain racing with thoughts that i'm going to die...