Suck It Up Buttercup. Boys Don’t Cry!
When do we start teaching our boys to “Man up”? It’s an aspect to our culture that is inevitable....”Stop acting like a girl”...”Suck it up”....Don’t be a pussy”....:”Big boys don’t cry”. So, even if you aren’t parenting in this manner, I can guarantee you that most of society is. Males are judged by- strength, size, lack of sensitivity, aggression, the ability to “endure or persevere” over others, NOT to be like a “girl” or have any feminine attributes, virility, athletic ability, and just being “better” than the males around them. Challenge that paradox.....and there might be trouble in paradise (so most don’t).
I was extremely appreciative when Sam Yothers (a Pennridge Alumni and former team football manager) sent me her college paper on “Hypermasculinity In Male Athletes” that she wrote for her Psychosocial Perspectives of Sports Injury class at West Chester University. I was totally wow’d at how well written, easy to understand and just how freakin’ RELEVANT and UNSPOKEN all of this information continues to be in our sports culture and society! I’m very thankful she allowed me to publish her essay for everyone to read.... She truly loves to assist athletes in all sports but has an especially deep admiration and dedication to football players. As Sam continues to work towards a Masters Degree (accelerated program) to become an Athletic trainer, she notes having a genuine interest in sports psychology....
It is an impressive piece of writing with some VERY valuable information that society CHOOSES to ignore. So wake up.
A football player is lying on the ground, screaming and grasping at the back of his knee. Something is obviously wrong. The opposing coaches are pacing and talking loudly. The opposing team is telling him to “suck it up”. Parents are yelling from the stands, “get that boy off the field!” This is hypermasculinity. Many will say this is just how football is. If so, it needs to change. Hypermasculinity as a critical theory, is often misunderstood. It does not entertain the idea that men are bad or evil; it is simply an exaggeration or extreme of typical masculine
behavior. In other words, it is when typical male gender roles are taken to an unnecessary and often unhealthy level. The hypermasculinity typically seen within male-dominated sports, specifically all levels of American football, has serious negative effects on male athletes (MA) mentally, emotionally and physically.
There is a stigma that surrounds the mental health of men, especially MA. They are, based on a general societal expectation, supposed to be tough. This leads to a degradation of mental health for those men, because, to be tough, they feel as though they need to keep their emotions or mental health struggles to themselves. Unfortunately, the American sports world does not give attention to the mental health crisis until it is too late. Tyler Hilinski, a football
player at Washington State University, is a tragic example of the sports world not paying enough attention to mental health. Tyler shot and killed himself on January 16, 2018 at the age of 20, following what was a stand-out season for the young quarterback. In a Sports Illustrated interview with Tyler’s family, his parents said that a suicide note revealed that he had struggled for quite some time. He felt as though people would look at him differently or that he would be a
bother if he told someone about his depression. He did not understand that he was not alone; more and more football players, retired and active, are being diagnosed with depression. In a sport where head injuries are prevalent, there needs to be an open dialog about depression and other mental health issues. In a study of 269 retired NFL players found that, 11.1% reported being clinically depressed since retirement. This number directly correlated with recurrent concussions; those who reported three or more concussions were three times more likely to be diagnosed with depression compared to those who had no history of concussion. The mental health of athletes is important and if they could be vulnerable and have real conversations without fear of being ridiculed, lives could be saved.
Hypermasculine ideals support society’s flawed idea that MA are more equipped to overcome body image issues than female athletes. This could not be further from the truth. Like female athletes, MA face pressure to better their performance by changing their bodies. However, due to societal norms, they themselves do not view their own hurried attempts to change their weight as being detrimental. On top of this, MA often feel awkward when discussing body issues or may even be written off by authority figures whom they find the
courage to confide in. This is where disordered eating and alcohol abuse can arise. MA are more likely to struggle with alcohol abuse than their female counterparts. The pressure to conform to group norms in terms of appearance is the same pressure that applies when it comes to binge drinking. Team dynamics are a huge part of body issues and binge drinking. MA fit into the category of high alcohol intake alongside surprisingly low levels of body satisfaction. These MA are encouraged to outdrink each other at parties and often told they are weak if they cannot drink as much as their friends. While this affects the MA emotionally, it also harms them physically.
Perhaps the most visible way that MA are affected by hypermasculine culture is physically. The tragic story of Jordan McNair illustrates what can happen when a culture of masculinity turns toxic. He was a nineteen-year old offensive lineman at University of Maryland. On May 29, 2018 he collapsed at a workout, went into a coma, never woke up and passed away six weeks later. McNair was very lethargic throughout the workout and when he began to slow even more, rather than tell him to go see the medical personnel, his coaches told him to “suck it
up.” Sadly, there are numerous stories just like McNair’s. Many high school athletes play through pain, not because they want to, or their teammates or parents encourage them to, but because their coach tells them to. Playing through mild pain or discomfort can make an athlete stronger, however playing through injury or extreme discomfort (for example: having difficulty breathing) only hurts athletes. MA who experiences success in sports are given acceptance and attention from peers as well as coaches, fans, and even family. They become aware at a young age that this acceptance can often be conditional based on winning. Their perception of success narrows to the point where they will play through anything to impress continue receiving this attention.
MA are not only more inclined to push themselves past a healthy limit, they are also more likely to push another MA past their breaking point. A study that asked the high school football players a variety of questions regarding their motivations, found some interesting results. They included things like, “Would you injure an opponent purposefully? Would you intimidate an opponent following a big play? Would you risk injury to an opponent?” They found that about 27% of the 204 MA said they would at least sometimes do these things.
When questioned what motivated them to do so, many indicated thinking it was necessary to be good at football. Therefore, coaches need to teach young MA that it is good to be aggressive but that being overly aggressive does not make them “more of a man.”
The desire to fit in is what makes MA neglect to report mental health struggles or feel as though suicide is the only way out of a situation that seems unending. This same aspiration makes them want to cut weight quickly, bulk up in a week or drink themselves into a blackout simply to prove they are tougher than their friends. It makes a nineteen-year old push himself to death to prove himself to his coach. It is not hard to see the ways in which a hypermasculine culture of men’s sports has a negative effect on those playing them. Mental health issues are something that should become a common dialog throughout the nation, especially in a sport where head injuries are common. Emotional health is often overlooked for men and hard to discuss, but things like body image issues and alcohol abuse are direct results of MA wanting to fit in with teammates. Physical health is perhaps the one that most people think of - a coach yelling “suck it up” and can be the most detrimental, as demonstrated by the death of Jordan McNair. The hypermasculine attitudes and ideals faced by MA, especially American football players, has serious negative effects on athletes mentally, emotionally and physically. They are affected not only while playing but long after they have ended their careers.