#saw!kaan

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wuff

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doodle

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i think its sweet that kaan is a figure who helps both the damorikos figure out what love is supposed to look and feel like. both of them have the viewpoint of “being taken advantage of = love” to the point that theyre uncomfortable with being loved in a way that isnt destructive. moriko in particular struggles with this dynamic at first because she also thinks not being taken advantage of = being actively unloved and gets incredibly upset when kaan wont let her be his therapist. bitch she was her moms therapist and the directors therapist and sometimes damons therapist and THAT was fine (it wasnt) shes mature for her age (shes not) she can handle it (she cant)

moriko gets frustrated with being treated like the child she actually is because shes been so heavily adultified her whole life she thinks she is one

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sawntence kaamon wouldnt work if it wasnt a polyamorous relationship theres no way kaan would emotionally be able to handle damons general cruelty after being recently traumatized if he didnt have his Normal Well Adjusted Emotionally Intelligent Husband to ground him. he gets much better at handling it later on but without gale there as a support figure that loves him and makes sure he knows he loves him and frequently reminds him that hes actually not a horrible person who deserved everything that happened to him he wouldnt have lasted long enough TO get better at it

damon you owe gale so much actually. be nice to him if this guy wasnt around kaan wouldve had a full mental breakdown 8 months into you being there

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idont have anything of substance to say about sawntence kaan atm but i need to express how hard im thinking about him rn. Myy guy

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thinking about sawntence kaan and his siblings. i think if mr jigsaw west didnt die when he did but kaan still survived they wouldve been put on the jigsaw watchlist, particularly felix. both because theres a lot you could put him in a saw trap for and the fact he wanted kaan as an apprentice. and the quickest way to make him more Malleable is to kill/maim his brother. not only because hes so dear to him but it puts kaan right back in the headspace he was in during the worst trauma hes experienced; both a mixture of junos death and the shit that happened to felix when he almost died and kaan had to handle it himself

and even though theyre both very much adults now felix is still kind of a security blanket for kaan. hes still the person he thinks of first when extremely scared or upset and wants comfort from someone and taking that away from him would be debilitating. i think he talks about him after getting shot (not immediately after but yknow. when shit gets Dire) in canon; for lack of a better comparison like in sdr2 ch1 when teruteru starts calling for his mom before getting executed

also just realized that if kaan is 36 in sawntence iii then felix is 43. Kind of a dilf reblog

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writing a couple wips of polar opposite kaan variants (idol!kaan vs. saw!kaan) but man they are not as different as they seem. if sawntence kaan lost / never gained his wider support system like idol kaan had he’d probably be just as awful. they hold the same major negative traits (violent tendencies, just for sawntence kaan its only directed towards himself, self-hatred that runs so deep it becomes selfish, paranoid, driven by guilt and shame) its just that sawntence kaan had the opportunity to recognize these and try to combat them

and idol kaan could’ve been a good person too. he wanted to be a nurse when he was little. he wanted to save people just like sawntence kaan did before he came to the conclusion that its a pointless endeavor, we all die anyway