#scared ace

[flowersonpebbles]

Sighs

I need to vent. I'll ventit here. Maybe other people's perspectives will be good for me.

Okay. So.

Marriage am I right?

Recently in my life some people I know have gone through bad shit regarding marriage.

One couple is divorcing cuz the guy spends all day on his pc or ps, calls his mom every night for 2 hours. But he can't go sit at the dinner table and eat with his wife. Okay. So she obviously feels emotionally neglected. That's fair. I understand that completely.

Then the other situation is the woman wants to divorce but can't cuz the man won't let her take what she's due. She's worked her whole fucking life for that money and he simply won't let her have some of it. Whatever lease they signed blah blah.

THEN this morning a customer sent some stuff cuz they work with brides for make up and jewellery and such. And I had to go to my Bible and read the verse she's referring to cuz I can't read ONE word out of all that. I could read everything but the one and didn't wanna bother her. She helped me anyway cuz I couldn't find it. But the verse in question just... I don't know.

I'm a horrible Christian... 😂

Listen. Some of my best friends and family...

"What's the point of dating if the end goal isn't marriage?"

Yeah. Okay. I usually agreed. Yup. I did. Cuz ye you want your soul mate for life etc etc

Another friend's dad always says 'if the woman wears the pants there will be chaos' gee thanks.

But that fucking verse. 1 Peter/Petrus 3.

I just... Good grief. I can't. Listen. I can't.

I'll be a fucking horrible wife. I'd have to change myself to be something I'm not to make another person happy. How is that.. Okay to all of us? How is that... Good for all of us?

I have to... HA lol no. I just.

I'm ace. I am sex repulsed. I also don't actually enjoy cuddling and kissing. I'd be obviously a very neglectful woman then. Because I like hand holding and forehead kisses and pecks and I just...

So if I date someone everyone will obviously start asking why we don't marry cuz that's the environment I'm in. I don't want to marry. I'd be awful. In many ways. I wouldn't WANT to marry, I'd just want to date. But if his side will also be like mine we'll be made to marry. I'm so fucking scared. What the fuck man. What's the point if I'll be frowned upon? If I'll break something I love so dearly? Nah. Nah man...

[flowersonpebbles]

question for aces

I have a question for my fellow asexuals in a hetero romantic relationship:

Am I the bad guy for not wanting and enjoying the spicy things?

[goomy658]

Kinda having an identity crisis trying to figure out if I like girls because I realized that having a tall basketball playing girlfriend would be just as cool as an emo ace boyfriend.

I've never wanted to have seggs with girls so that's what has kept me from questioning it earlier. But after I realized that I don't wanna have seggs with anyone a couple of months ago I'm having a late-night crisis.

I've only had romantic feelings for one person in my life, he was a close friend of mine. And I didn't know what those feelings even were before I told my friend and she explained to me that they were romantic. So I'm not quite sure if I've had them for other people.

AND THIS DID NOT HELP, THANKS PLAYBUZZ!

And now I think I'm faking it for attention because I'm posting about it. ;-;

And now my phone is dying.