“ friends aren’t allowed to kiss one another. ”
meme || SELECTIVELY ACCEPTING || @sceltaa
she’d KNOWN what he was going to do. he drops his gaze, drops his hand from her waist, feels his heart drop into his stomach. friends. RIGHT. because that was what he INSISTS that they are. this is his own fault; he is good at fucking shit up, making the WRONG calls. seems like that’s all he’s EVER been good at. he’s been lying to her, though. he’s afraid of having something to LOSE all over again.
fehl prime. april. earth. his uncle.
he couldn’t save them, so how the hell was he supposed to save his goddamn COMMANDING OFFICER? and that’s another thing. she’s THE GREAT COMMANDER SHEPARD. and what is he? some grunt who got attention for making what ended up being an unnecessary sacrifice for some intel, which the brass thought meant he had the BALLS to be a leader like shepard.
maybe he does, maybe he doesn’t. it sure don’t feel like it now, as his eyes find her lips and all he wants to do is pull her to him, tell her that she’s his best friend, the best damn CO he’s EVER had, tell her that he’d walk through hell itself for her. nah, he looks like enough of an idiot now. this…this is his fault. he’s sure she thinks he doesn’t want her, doesn’t care about her. he’s gotta own this. even if he loves her.
he swallows the knot that seems to form in the back of his throat, all too acutely aware of cortez trying and failing to give them some privacy, self-conscious of the way his voice cracks like some goddamn kid on her nickname.
“i think you and me both know we ain’t been just FRIENDS for a long time, lola.”
