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Know that it's okay to ask “why” at least 100 times a day. (Much as this isn't always super fun for you.)

Since Morgan is starting school NEXT week, I loved reading this. :)

I'm That Mom Who Does Her Kids' School Projects for Them

Embarrassingly, I admit that when I see my children work on a school project and it starts looking less than the standards of my “vision,” I just end up doing it for them. I think this is a disorder of mine and I might have to go to some kind of parent support group for it. When I see my kids cutting, coloring, and glueing something together, something snaps inside of me and I automatically take it away from them so I can do it myself.

I know … it makes me sound freakishly controlling, doesn’t it?

Now, my kids are only 5 and 7 and the projects we’ve done so far only include a photo journal of our trip to Washington, D.C. and “Pirates vs. Ninjas – Who Wins?” but let me tell you I was overly-enthusiastic-Timothy-Q.-Mouse happy to do them. My kids, however, seemed to only be interested in the glueing and the cutting, and about 10 minutes in, they left me to do most of the legwork.

For some, you might say that take-home projects and assignments are a huge waste of time (which could be true), but for borderline-neurotic characters like myself, I see them as a blessing.

If you’re just like me, go ahead and raise your hand (don’t be shy!) Apparently we’re not alone. Jessica Lahey of the New York Times writes:

“It’s time to stop the madness, and I’m not just talking to parents, here. Yes, parents have to keep their itchy trigger fingers off the hot glue gun, but teachers also need to recognize their part in perpetuating this farce and hold parents accountable for their egregious acts of educational interference. So here is what I propose: How about we both commit to a cease-fire?”

Easier said than done, lady.

Seriously, someone should handcuff me from behind whenever my children are doing their school projects at home. I know it sounds neurotic, but I am that batshit crazy parent who will blow $200 or more at Michaels just to make my kids’ poster boards look perfect. I am addicted to curating the perfect school project with the white hot intensity of a thousand suns, people.

I know this is wrong and that I’m guilty of parental intervention at every level, but it can feel awfully satisfying to really blow a second grade project out of the water. Give me the Alamo and I will give you a precisely scaled-down replica of the most important shrine of Texas liberty. (Uh, with my children’s help, of course.)

You can classify it as cheating, but let’s be real here. It’s like telling an eighth-grader to do a take-home test without using the Internet. I mean, what are the chances? And what about all those toddler finger-painting classes we used to take with our 3-year-olds at the rec center? There’s no denying that 80 percent of the projects were made by the parents …

I know this is a problem — in fact, I admit to being the problem — and as much as it’s going to pain me, I know I to have to start trying to step waaaaaay back to let my kids do the projects themselves. Being the home “Project Manager” surely isn’t going to be beneficial to my children’s future education. Mommy can’t do it all (and shouldn’t). Just like with the Trader Joe’s tub of peppermint bark ice cream that’s in my freezer, I’m going to have to leave it there and let my children have at it, no matter how much it pains me.

In the meantime, does anyone want to join my club? It’s called the PWDSPA (Parents Who Do School Projects Anonymous.) Just don’t tell a teacher. —Joanna Mazewski

(Photo: Thinkstock)

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