#scooter venting

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I don’t think I’m gonna be able to update Woundedly this week either. I’m still struggling with things in my personal life.

I do want to try to update Snuggle Bat this week though. I think focusing on some fluff will help my mindset.

Thank you to everyone who has been so kind and patient with me 🩷🩷🩷

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Guys I found out through a TikTok what happened in Absolute Batman #23 I’m gonna fucking cryyyyyyyy

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I have tried to work on Woundedly, Snuggle Bat, and two other one-shots today and my brain has been resistant to writing all of them.

I think I’m gonna try and work on an angsty Jason-centric one-shot that I’ve been thinking about for a little while.

I just need to get back to writing, whatever that looks like. I want to write. I miss it and it’s so frustrating that I have the urge to create and yet I’m being mentally blocked from actually executing anything.

I really wanna post this week. I don’t know what story I’ll be able to write, but I wanna get something done.

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Hey remember when I said I’d write a fluffy DC romantic fic for Pride Month?

Yeahhhhhh I couldn’t think of one single fluffy idea I actually wanted to write

(also depression is hitting hard but that’s besides the point)

One day!! I will write a romantic fic for the Batman fandom!!

Today is not that day though

[scooter3scooterr]

hi scooter! i was learning about the effects of childhood neglect and it reminded me of how you write timmy in the bad puppy series, so i thought i’d share!

so basically, if a child is chronically left alone at home, or has emotionally avoidant parents that are not attuned to their needs and feelings, they learn they’re unimportant, that there’s something wrong with them. it’s first learned as a wound, but that shame also becomes a strategy, a defense mechanism. because if there is something wrong with them, then they can fix it, they can work to become lovable and important. but that shame is also fundamental to the way they operate in the world, because if they’re not unimportant, and if there is nothing wrong with them, then why are their parents doing this to them? and so they’re completely powerless over their own suffering. apparently that powerlessness is a way worse pain than just believing there’s something wrong with them. parallel to that, there’s also the belief that “if i make myself so unimportant, so wounded and wrong, maybe my parents will see that, and finally take care of me”. so this wound and profound shame is actually what allows that child to live in the world functionally, however that looks.

for sure you already know this about tim in the bad puppy series, and it’s very clear in how you write him but i just thought it was interesting to see it from a different perspective <3

Well, I feel very seen right now.

I really like the way you explained the effects of neglect, it’s very relatable. I definitely vent into Tim a lot when I write Bad Puppy. I’m not gonna go into it too much but I had abusive and neglectful parents and so I pour my emotions into Tim quite a bit. Writing Bad Puppy has actually been really helpful for me to work through my own feelings of being unloveable and as if there’s something wrong with me, as you mentioned are symptoms of childhood neglect.

I definitely agree that the powerlessness is a worse pain. It’s awfully hard to come to terms with the fact that your parents didn’t love you, not because they couldn’t but because they just didn’t.

That is a very good point that the thought process can shift into wanting to make yourself as wounded as possible in order to be given the love you need. Maybe that’s something I’ll have to explore later on in Bad Puppy.

I appreciate you sharing what you’ve learned. I’m glad that the way I’ve written Bad Puppy has felt accurate to the research you’ve done.

Thank you for the ask, it means a lot :)

🩷🩷🩷

[scooter3scooterr]

I suppose the silver lining with having a rough visit with my Mom is that now I have more writing inspiration