#scott conners

[-burn-book]

@Princess: Name one planet you think suits each of your coworkers here at the burn book best, and why?

Oh! This will be fun!

Claret = Sun: The Sun is not a planet but I will make the exception because of the very uncanny resemblance between the editor and chief and burning star. Petra, Scott, and I would not be on the Burn Book without her, so you could say that we orbit around her! Physical resemblences? Her fiery red hair and quick tongue are sure to burn ya if you cross her the wrong way.

Petra = Venus: Besides the obvious reason of the planet being the planet of luuurve, Venus ties into people that are people pleasers and pleasure givers. How else would you describe Cupid Petra!? She's often hard at work helping people find their true love!

Scott = Mercury: I see this as the planet of knowledge and Scott is just full of it! Give him choices and he'll go into detail about each one before telling you his final answer. He's very smart and isn't afraid to show it. Got a question about anything (preferably comic related)? Scott is definitely the go to las.

Princess = Jupiter: Upbeat and wise, Jupiter people always think of most situations with the mindset that the glass is half full. I like to think of myself as a optimistic thrill seeker :)

Abbey = Pluto: because Pluto used to be a planet but not anymore.

[-burn-book]

For the entertainment column: Who was the best Batman actor in your opinion? And James Bond actor?

The best Batman actor? Whatever you're smoking I want some since that shit is a hard decision to make. Now, I've seen all the Batman movies at least a dozen times. You'll have to understand Batman is the king of all others to me. In DC anyhow, though Rorschach does come close to blasting him out of the water and into a sea of whores and politicians. That's a reference, ignore me.

The original Batman, Lewis Wilson, cannot be topped. Come on, if he wasn't the best, they wouldn't keep trying to recreate great movies. But you know who comes staggeringly close being as perfect? Christian motherfucking Bale. I would sell all my comics just to shake that man's hand. Legend, seriously. Actually, you know what my lifelong dream has been so far? 

Christian Bale as Batman versus Evan Rachel Wood as Poison Ivy. It does not get any better than that, mate, I assure you.

Dark Knight was fucking great, what the actual. I died at least twenty times from love. Pure love.

Moving on. James Bond isn't really a huge thing of mine. Yeah, there, I said it. I missed the James Bond boat, but I'm going to go with Pierce Brosnan. This is a really shallow opinion, shoot me if you must, but I've said it. Does nobody watch Austin Powers anymore? Austin vs. James would have Austin winning each and every time.

Now go drink some juice. It's very early and I'm concerned for your health. All your vitamins, yada yada. 

May the force be with you.

Scott C.

[-burn-book]

Ireland or Scotland?

O-kay. Ireland as in Northern Ireland or Ireland? It depends for that reason. Between those two, let's say you meant Ireland, and move on with this question. Ireland has good things going on for it. I love the alcohol, and the traditional dances. Not so cray-cray about the intense barfights, no. I just want to kick back and chill without having to worry about a pint to my skull, you know? I love the accents. Hell, I love the people. I have at least four Irish friends. Most notably Liam Cleary, who is a blast, always. And then there's, uh, well Ishmael and Christopher are both Irish but we don't even. Yeah, I need to work on that. There are people in town as well, I meant.

Moving onto Scotland. Nobody could tell you how awesome it is more often and more passionately than Emery Abendroth. He has a French mother, and a German father, both very awesome countries and still identifies himself as a scot. Says a lot, if you ask me. I'm not too crazy about the kilts, cuisine, or the bagpipes but it's a beautiful country. If we're going to talk about accents as well, their accents are just as cool as the Irish accent. Let's not even go to how these men hold their liquor. Fantastic drinking buddies. On a final and finalising note, Captain Britain was educated in Edinburgh which gives Scotland mad cool points in my book. 

Without further reasoning, the winner here is Scotland.

May the force be with you.

Scott C.

[-burn-book]

Penguin or Poison Ivy?

Okay, between you and me I love Batman questions, but there's always that one question that makes you nerd rage because how can you fucking choose? Like asking which comic issue is better than the other. This is not the case with this question. In fact, thank Aerith for you. 

Moving on, have you seen Poison Ivy? She's fit as fuck. Like a total babe. Not to mention she's extremely intelligent and sultry. You can throw Catwoman, Batgirl and the Silk Spectre [Jr.] having a threesome at me, and I would still pass them up to have one fabulous night with the smart, sexy and malicious Poison Ivy.

More on visuals, you cannot deny that Penguin is a very funny looking kid. Might as well stamp overtly comical villain on his forehead. I enjoy the issues which feature him very much though. But placing him next to the other male antagonists, particularly the Joker, he just can't hold a handle to defend himself in contrast to all of Batman's other foes. Plus he's just a little annoying.

Going with my dick and my heart on this one. The winner of this round is Poison Ivy. 

May the force be with you.

Scott C.

[-burn-book]

Kinghorn or Brisbane?

Alright, firstly are you being serious? I take both their classes. You're clearly out to get me.

Right so, for those of you who live under rocks, Kinghorn is the Muggle Studies professor, and Brisbane is that asshole who will demean you whether you're taking Arithmancy or not. Don't take it personally though, gents, he's just unhappy with himself for not considering other career options. Not to worry, Professor B., while some of us are deluded enough to love you, we will not cry rivers if you leave. In fact, some career options for you to consider: [x], [x], [x]. 

Kinghorn's as happy and fuzzy as a bunny so long as she has brews and cupcakes, so open up a bakery that sells liquor and you'll be her favourite student. She's a lovely lass, though. Has one of those qualities you'd see in Storm, whereas Brisbane is more on the 'I will nag you like I'm your housewife' side. 

So, for me, the choice is easily Professor K. Turn in your essays and bring some food to class while you're at it, and you're good to go.

May the force be with you.

Scott C.