I just want someone to covertly hypnotize me to be literally unable to say anything that refuses a man, to always say yes *VERBALLY* while leaving the rest of my prudishness in tact. This would include not being able to refuse to truthfully answer questions, and not being able to use safe words. I wouldn’t realize it at first but after the “could you hand me that stapler”, innocent enough, there’s the “can you spare some change” and the “would you like fries with that?” Hard to miss it when I can’t stop myself from ordering fries I literally don’t want, just because the female cashier is trained to upsell. I try to figure out what’s wrong, but I don’t figure it out in time.
A man approaches me at a shop and asks for my number and to my horror I instantly provide it. He didn’t expect me to agree so quickly, he hadn’t even flirted, just asked a strange woman for her number. so he sees what other info he can get from me. Once he has my email and workplace, he asks for my address too. I feel like crying but he thinks I’m just begging for him to use the info against me. I go home thinking about changing my number, and I lock all the doors and windows, and resolve that tomorrow I’ll call the locksmith for better locks, but tomorrow is already too late.
I hear a knock at my door and stay silent, going he’ll leave. He texts my phone asking if I have a spare key hidden anywhere and to my horror I remember I do. As hard as I try I can’t stop my fingers from texting him the exact location. Turns out the whatever is forcing me to agree to everything men ask for applies to text messages too. When he comes in and corners me, he asks if I want him. I want to say no. I can’t. Instead, my mouth says “yes please, take me no matter how hard I fight”. He asks if I want it rough, if I’m a freak who likes to get hurt by strange men. My mouth says “yes”. He gives me a safe word. I repeat it back to him. When I realize I can say it I try to say it immediately after he starts approaching me, to say it for real this time. Nothing comes out. He doesn’t notice my attempt. He asks again if I want this. I’m cowering from him and telling him “I want this”.
when he’s on top of me, my instincts finally switch from “freeze” to “flight” as I try to struggle away from him but he thinks it’s all part of the game. He eventually gets tired of my desperate attempts and ties me up, leaving me ungagged in case I use the safe word. he hurts me, and sees me react in real pain. He notices I’m not even particularly wet. He checks in one finally time and asks if I really want this. I try to stay silent, hoping he’ll take that as a lack of consent. The hypnosis forces my mouth to open, telling him I need this. this is how I like to be treated. If my pain and fear make him hard, then I’m happy (I am not happy)
One time he asks if I’d like to stop. I get my hopes up about the phrasing like a dumb bitch before realizing that, since I know he *doesnt* want to stop, answering the affirmative would be refusing his wishes. I try to tell him Yes, I’d like to stop and I want him to leave and never come back. I tell him to keep going, to do whatever he likes to me.
He asks if he can invite some more friends over and I, of course, tell him I’d love that, wishing more than anything that he’d just leave. By the end of the night, I’ve agreed to everything they say, and all of my “no, please stop”s turn into “harder, hurt me more!” as they leave my mouth so they mostly stop asking me, and just treat me like a piece of fuck meat. I cry more that night than I’ve ever cried before, and they see my tears and laugh at what a freak I must be for liking this so much.
At the end of it all, the first man (I don’t even know his name, even though he knows all my personal information) looks at me and says “you know, you seem pretty eager to be treated like this, it’s a bit of a long shot, but can I just take you home with me? It’d be great to have a slut like you just kept at home to rape whenever. What do you say?”
