HELLO HELLO HELLO!!! May I please request an Akihiko Sanada x Male Reader who struggles with going to school consistently? thank yoooouuu!!!!
Author's note: Akihiko Sanada is one of those characters where you don't understand why he's so popular at first, so you kinda brush him off as the overly confident, one-dimensional personality character. Yet as the story goes on, and you actually spend time on his social link, you end up going, "I get it now." Him and Shinjiro can be such dorks, I adore these Persona/blood brothers.
The morning started out fine. There wasn't that much drowsiness this time around, and he didn't feel like wanting to lay in bed longer than five minutes. With flickering eyes, he tugged on the upper part of his blanket and moved it to his right side of the bed. He let out a rouse as he stood up to pull the covers back, flattened the tangled corners, along with patting the pillow to restore its shape. The loft feels nicer when it's fluffy. In a leisurely pace, the routine went on in the bathroom. After splashing cold water on his face, he cupped his hands to drink from a faucet, needing to get rid of the thick saliva that gave him a bad breath. When he was done, he made it back to his dorm room to change into the Gekkoukan uniform. Sliding into the black pants, putting on a white shirt button down, tying the slim ribbon tie, putting on the jacket with the school emblem, in addition to matching shoes.
Everything was on its place, even the old publications he had gotten from Bookworms that the teachers didn't want to cover for obvious reasons. Normally at this time, he would go downstairs to make some breakfast, after that he would brush his teeth and then get out of here before he missed the train, but for some reason, his thoughts seemed to lack willingness to go downstairs currently.
There was a couple of seconds flying by as he stared at his bed before going towards it, to then letting himself sink into the mattress’s dip. The room is silent, yet the building itself wasn't. He could hear Junpei walk by with that beaming energy of his, talking about breakfast with Ken. He had even momentarily heard Makoto outside of his door humming a familiar tune he couldn’t recall what it was called. It sounded nice, though.
The longer he sat there with the room still being dimly lit, the more he realised that he was beginning to have one of those days. The periods of lacking motivation. Normally, his semi depression would come from existential despair, being without direction or conviction, with no clear objective to steer him through, unless it is to be an obedient dog. Every move he had taken thus far appeared to be influenced by the whims of those around him--his parents, his friends, those at school--leaving him with a nagging sense of emptiness and detachment. He would question, desperately, what the meaning of his life was. Is this how it will be for the rest of his life? Getting a profession as a doctor to be financially secure and to be able to brag about being socially great while also pleasing his family? Pleasing those around him? That isn't enough; that isn't something he can live for.
He has had these moments in bed before, both in the morning and late at night, however he always managed to pull himself back to his normal self so that he could go to Gekkoukan and focus on his studies. What he hasn't been doing so well lately is actually staying there the whole day, some school days, even though they practically end at the same time. Feels much more extended because of certain classes, his mental energy isn't the strongest, and that does reflect on his Persona, he's not weak by any means, yet he does wear out faster than the others. So whenever he dosen’t have the energy to stick around, or at least pretend that he pays attention in class, he ditches them and comes up with several excuses. Some better than others.
He's mostly done this with Mr. Ekoda's lessons, which the man wasn't pleased at all in seeing, mainly since he's one of Ekoda's top students. He dosen’t enjoy classic literature as a whole, aside from myths and ancient stories, but what makes that class unbearable is the teacher himself. He's actually threatened him multiple times that he will fail him for poor attendance if he keeps on doing this, which has, of course, brought up Misturu's attention and started nagging him about it.
At the start, he got away with the lectures a lot. He's honestly surprised it took this long until S.E.E.S took notice of his absence. It made sense to some degree. He isn't in the same class as Makoto, Yukari, and Junpei. Not to mention that he was around to some degree, so if they did notice he was gone, they couldn't prove anything since he came back later to attend at least something else. He's never missed a single Kendo participation. It's one of the many hobbies he loves doing. Nevertheless, he dosen’t think this is the day where he'll keep his streak anymore.
He was jolted out of his thoughts by a gentle knock on the wooden door. It was a solid but not aggressive knock. Akihiko Sanada was standing there, his typical attire silhouetted against the hallway sunlight, as he slightly opened the door to see through the crack. He was always perplexed as to how his roommates could wear their school uniforms in such a distinctive fashion without being reprimanded by the school board. To demonstrate that his hairdo was natural, he had to submit the school's his medical documents. In contrast, they make it appear so much simpler.
“Hey,” he began, voice low enough to match the daylight’s hush, “everything alright? You normally be eating with us right now, but you've been in there for a while. Is something wrong?" He wasn't sure what to say to him, and the countdown for obvious hesitation was quick. He gently tapped the handle in a hushed motion, and the earliest thing comes to mind. “Yeah I'm fine, I just accidentally overslept a little. I'll catch up with you guys on the next train. Don't worry about it.” It sounded as if he was trying to convince himself more than him. It wasn't the best way he could have delivered it and he knew it, so he looked away. As if the words might punch him to the floor if they didn't struck the captain of the boxing team the correct way.Akihiko stepped forward and went in, not even letting him protest as the door began swinging shut behind him with a calm click.
“Hmm. ‘Fine’?” he mused, his tone softening as he crossed the room to peer out the window. Those grey eyes are indifferent to the weight of the moment. He turned back, putting his jacket on the desk chair, arms folding over his chest. “You’ve been skipping so many things lately that even Koromaru starts noticing. Even if the next train is fine, you’re not.” He felt his shoulders stiffen but uttered nothing. He knew exactly what this situation was—Akihiko’s persistence was strong, not just in battle, also in coaxing others out of their cycles. It's extremely annoying. Nonetheless, it can be a good trait as well. It means he won't easily give up on you. He's going to try even if it means you hate him for it.
“Alright, alright, you got me.” The male muttered with an exhaled tone, slumping onto the bed again. “If you’re going to play the frustrating older brother, you could at least make it a bit more convincing.” He slightly shaked his head at that response, Akihiko's chuckle was warm, short too. He sat beside them, the bed creaking under his weight. “You know me better than that.” He paused, then added, “Tell me what’s going on. You’re not fooling anyone.” He only glanced at him for a second before looking up at the ceiling, not wanting to reveal everything yet enough to make him know what's been bothering him so much. “It’s nothing big,” they offered, too quickly. “Just… life decisions. You know how it is.”
Akihiko hummed, his gaze narrowing slightly. The information wasn't much, and he isn't that much of an advicer. Words aren't his speciality, perhaps, though. In his own way, he can say something useful. “You don’t have to beat everything at once,” he begins, voice steady as a metronome, “but disappearing doesn’t make the problem weaker. It just lets it win by default.” The younger student slowly turned his gaze to look at him in an unamused, dumbfounded way. Did this muscle brained moron just use Lao Tzu's idiom in a battle manner to explain what he should do? Akihiko rests his right arm on his thigh, recalling the boy’s excuses—lack of care, and tiredness, in addition to a fear of failing expectations.
“Whenever me, Shinjiro, and Mitsuru fought in the Dark Hour back in middle school, we didn’t always know our next move.” He says it in a melancholic tone, a tiny smile reaching his lips. “But we showed up, day after day, even when all we had was a slim chance of hope. That’s how you fight doubt. Not with perfection but instead with persistence. You don’t know what you’ll become if you keep going like this. Depression doesn’t start with a punch. It’s a slow fall, and I’ve seen what it does to people. You don’t want to get to the point where ‘the next train’ has passed ten times.”
There is this comfortable silence as the younger student swallowed a bit of his saliva. He let out an unhurried sigh at the ceiling as he uttered with honesty. “I don’t know if I can do that anymore.” Their voice was little, almost in a whisper. Akihiko exhaled, leaning back slightly. “Then start with something simple. Take a walk, spar with me, and talk to someone. You don’t have to solve everything today, but you can’t let yourself fall right now, or someone else will end up dragging you because you were vulnerable. I’m not Mitsuru, and I’m not here to teach you that not focusing on your studies will mess you over. You don’t need that. But I am here to remind you that you’re not alone in this. Even if our circumstances aren't exactly the same.”
The male nodded im acknowledgment, it's a heavy motion filled with genuineness. They looked at Akihiko then, really looked at him—the lines of his face, the way he always seemed to carry the weight of others without ever complaining about his own.
“I don’t want to be stuck like that, I don't plan on it either,” he admitted. “Good,” Akihiko said, standing to take his jacket whilst also offering a hand. “Then let’s start by getting you to school. You'll have to skip breakfast, but I'll buy you lunch when the time comes. Can't have your stomach empty when we're going to Tartaurus tonight.” He reached out to take his hand. As they rose, Akihiko squeezed his palm briefly before letting go. “Next time, I won’t have to come knocking.” “Yeah,” their voice was uncertain, even though knowing it is for the best. “Next time, I’ll just… go.”
They didn't say anything further as they hurriedly packed their things and ran for the door in an attempt to catch the train as it surely would arrive at the station less than five minutes. The cool wind touched them as they ran out of the dorm building. He hoped he alone could find his meaning in life before tragedy struck him and everyone he held in his heart.