#segment1

[angelgurlhearts13]

So guess what starts today? No, not a fair. I wish.😕nope! I start drivers training today for 3 weeks! It's only Monday through Thursday, so that's good. I'm scared to actually get driving on the road because of my diabetes. Well, hopefully this will be a good segment. #segment1 #driving #driverstraining #diabetes #freshprinceofbelair #willsmith #carlton

[alivex-blog]

Things I hate, ugh! SEG1

When you put your sunglasses on top of your head and then your hair gets in a huge knot around them and you can’t get them off! Ugh!

[storiesandprints-blog]

Story Update!

Here is the first part of my story (~4pgs), all complete and ready for your feedback!

“Lori!”

Please, God, no.

“Wait, Lori!”

She turned around to see Ian sprinting towards her through the evening park runners and couples on dates. His dark brown locks bounced with each stride, standing out against the deep green and light gray of trees and concrete behind him. He grinned that blinding smile, waving at her excitedly as he ran.

How did he find her?

Scuffing the heel of her Vans on sidewalk, she shifted her weight and crossed her arms under her chest as he slowed to a stop in front of her. The park around them never slowed, its visitors bustling and walking around them as they carried on.

“Hi, Ian.”

“Hey,” he said, still smiling. “Why’d you leave early last night? The party was just getting good.”

“Wasn’t feelin’ it.” Lori shrugged, feigning nonchalance.

She moved to the side of the walkway, getting out of the way of the other park-goers, Ian walking beside her.

“Well, after you left, it wasn’t fun anymore.”

She inhaled sharply, biting the inside of her lip.

Now why he gotta say that?

“Not only did I have no one to hang with, but Madison kept trying to get me to go back to her place.”

A glimpse of Madison’s pale fingers slipping through Ian’s shoulder length hair flashed in her mind. Their drunken bodies were only inches apart and Ian’s hands were on her hips. Lori blinked the vision away.

They stood near an occupied bench, leaning on the black barred fence separating the sidewalk from the grass. The sun set behind Ian’s head, soft oranges and pinks and blues swirling out from the horizon.

Lori smoothed out her navy blue skirt, replying, “Sorry you had to deal with Madison, but I wanted to go home. Had a long day at work, and I was so done.”

“It’s fine, just lemme know next time.” He smiled.

“Yeah, sure.”

Another glimpse flashed, but of what happened after she saw Madison and Ian. She was heading down the stairs from her friend’s apartment when she passed by a window. She slowed down to stare at her reflection, her warm brown skin and eyes standing out against the dark outside. She blinked and saw two bright, lime green eyes lurking just beyond the glass, perhaps from a tree. She took a step closer to it to get a better look, but as soon as she did, they vanished. Just, gone.

“Lori?”

Her head snaps to attention. “Huh?”

“I asked if you wanted to grab dinner.”

“Dinner?”

“Yeah, and maybe… chill at my place, I don’t know.”

A light summer breeze slipped by, ruffling almost everything in the area. His wavy, tousled mass of hair rolled smoothly in the wind while her thick Marley braids merely shifted. He pushed a longer lock back behind his ear as he waited for her to answer, that smile of his still blinding.

He was everything she could’ve ever wanted. She wanted to run.

“Look, Ian, I—”

A large, dark shape darted across the evening sky behind Ian, pulling her attention from him.

“I—I don’t—”

“Don’t what?”

She turned back to him, making the mistake of looking into his eyes. Drawing herself out of the deep abyss, she stared at the bridge of his nose and said, “I don’t think that’s the best idea.”

He frowned. “Why not?”

“Because.” She looked over at the nearest tree in an attempt to avoid his eyes. Instead, she locked gazes with the ones from last night.

“What is that?” she whispered, focusing on the intense lime green spheres.

“What?” He looked behind them, and turned back, a confused look on his face.

The eyes had vanished again.

“I just… I…”

“Hey,” he leaned closer and touched her arm lightly, “are you alright?”

She looked down, saying, “Yeah.”

His hand lingered, his thumb making a small circling motion. “Would you please just talk to me?”

All she could feel for a moment was his hand, and she wanted more.

She looked back up, bracing herself and not fully meeting his eye. “Ian, I’m not what you want,” she said, rolling her arm out of his grip. “You think I’m—I dunno—exotic and ‘interesting,’ or something.”

“Is that what you think? Ex—You should know that’s not—”

“Ian, it’s fine… but you should ask out Madison.”

He stared at her for a moment, before asking, “And why would I do that?”

“She likes you enough and she’s more your style, she’s just not good at approaching you.”

“If you would just listen, I—”

She turned her head, looking across the path at people passing by. “I’ll text you later, Ian.” She bit the inside of her cheek, refusing to look at him.

Ian stood for a bit, staring hard at her. “Yeah, whatever.” In her peripheral vision, he shoved his hands in his jean pockets and trudged off. He didn’t look back.

The sun inched closer and closer the horizon and it started to get dark. Lori sat on the recently freed park bench, staring at the shoes of people walking past. The park nightlights came on and she hated herself.

With the slow departure of the sun came the sudden departure of crowds, leaving behind the park for restaurants, concerts, and dance clubs. She stood in the absence of the crowd, slowly walking towards the pond she frequented in the park.

She stood at the edge of the pond, a few ducks and geese minding their business throughout the vicinity. One was only several yards away, wading in the water, and she bent over to peer at it.

She made a face at it.

It squawked at her and she jumped back.

Stupid goose.

Turning away from the bird, a shiver crept up her lower back. She smoothed out her skirt once more, walking towards the trees across the path. She was already alone, but it was still too exposed.

Standing in the middle of the mass of trees, she looked up through the branches, her eyes closed as she soaked in the warmth of the diminishing sunlight on her face, shadows of swaying branches dancing over her skin.

And then her face was cold from complete shadow.

She opened her eyes with a glare that didn’t last long. Sitting at the tops of the trees above her was a monster, enormous and as black as the night sky. Its claws gripped into the tree bark, its teeth were bared in a snarl, and its lime green eyes glowed brilliantly.

She couldn’t scream, but she could run. And did she run.

But she wasn’t fast enough.

Shadow loomed over her, and wind whipped and rushed around her.

She had only reached the edge of trees across from the pond, the geese flying away in a panic. Before her, the large beast landed, its wings stretching as high as the trees, its mass blocking out the last of the sun. It lowered its head down in front of her, its eyes piercing into hers.

“Be calm, child,” the beast growled in her mind.

“You—You, you—” Lori sputtered. “You’re in my head?”

“How else am I to communicate with you?”

“I—I…” Lori faded off, her eyes blinking heavier and slower.

Her legs gave out and she fell to the ground with a thud as the sun slipped past the horizon.

[storiesandprints-blog]

Segment One: Revisited!

Alright, so let's attempt to go back through all that I've done up until the first segment.

When I first got the idea to write this story, I was sitting in a HALO (Hispanic-American Leadership Organization) meeting. I was staring out the window, lost in my own mind when I started something like a daydream or thought/imagination process of a dragon. Then it turned into a dragon that only I could see. Then it was a story idea: a girl who came across a dragon that claimed it answered to her. As stories always morph the further they are developed, mine transformed from a girl who discovers she has the loyalty of a dragon to a black girl with race-related esteem issues who meets a dragon that instills confidence in her. I do enjoy writing stories for the thrill of writing stories, but recently my stories and ideas have taken on a social justice and awareness perspective. (My last short story was about two black girls surviving a "zombie" apocalypse together while dealing with the reoccurring disappearance of their Korean male friend. It was supposed to give representation to minorities in apocalyptic situations, as well as representation of platonic relationships in said situations. Not everything is about romantic love.) 

Moving on, I began writing this in December, over winter break, starting with a short scene at the beginning of the current story. Lori, the main character, runs into Ian, a friend of hers she's totally crushing on him, at the park. It starts off pretty average in terms of fiction genres, (probably romantic comedy), when we start drifting into Lori's memories, one of something she'd rather not think about, and the other of something she can't get out of her mind: bright, lime green eyes staring at her from outside a window. (hint about the/my writing process!) She then proceeds to meet the dragon, fly, and then somehow get the confidence in herself and others that she needs to allow herself to be happy. So what started off as a small idea in the middle of a meeting grew into a scene which then grew into a short story (that's still in progress)!

While I only have 4 complete pages, I have 7 pages in my word document ready to be added to, revised, reread, expanded on, etc. I just need to reevaluate my plot, think some more about my characters, add in more details, connect the dangling scenes and snippets, and brainstorm some more on the ending. Over spring break next week, I plan to write a lot more and really work out the kinks in this story. I hope the results are beyond satisfying.

Also, I was slightly bored yesterday and wound up using dollmakers to show the character designs for Lori and the dragon, Adriel (name subject to change). I forgot about Ian, but I doubt a dollmaker will do the Ian in my mind justice. I'll post the character designs after the next post.

The post after this one will be the first section of the story, the part I've finished. I probably won't revise and edit this part as much as the second part as I've been working on this one longer and have most likely filtered out some of the really bad writing already. Anyway, I hope you read it and enjoy it!

[storiesandprints-blog]

Reflecting... on Writing...

First off, wow, is writing hard. But it's always been challenging for me, in a good way that makes me feel proud of my finished product for many reasons.

To me, rhetoric through the perspective fiction writing is one of rhetoric's truest forms. The writer aims to persuade the audience to believe the plot is rational and believable for the story, (not necessarily for real life), through the diction and word choice, the style of writing, the emotions throughout the story, etc. All of these are very key elements of rhetoric.

A big part of writing, for me at least, is style, which can depend on word choice and the author. Word choice and details are always a bit challenging for me when concerning my style of writing. For instance, I'm trying to write this one scene right now:

But it's not all that I'm picturing. There's more imagery and details in my mind, but I don't know how to put it in without it turning out corny-ish, maybe even over-descriptive/overdramatic:

How do I add more without adding too much, without overplaying the rhetoric of my writing, my story, and my portrayal/depiction? This is the dilemma I am constantly running into when writing. Of course, I run into other issues, such as which word am I thinking of but can't remember, or which word fully illustrates/depicts the image I see in my head. Other petty stuff like such that comes with writing.