Musings From a Nook: Library Observation
the things and people I see while seated at a table en pleine air (as in came too late to get a cubicle). I should be studying for a major test.
-The Trusting Soul: endearing, hopeful, utterly stupid. He left his laptop/bag/ everything unattended for 15 minutes. In that time I and many other possible scoundrels could have stolen his laptop, posted it on ebay, sold it, and then used his credit cards to purchase an Hermes and 3 trips to Monaco.
-The Academic Bro: Bro'd out to the nines; northface, boat shoes, lettersweater, slightly askewed hat, scruff, a figure that evokes an 8 year football career mixed with gratuitous recent malted beverage intake and swollen sockets that suggest a weed habit and sporadic coke usage. However don't let his appearance fool ye, hes in the quiet section of the library because he has a test, and cannot concentrate at his abode where "SUCK MAH DICK BITCH!" is screamed repeatedly over a soundtrack of dave matthews and his friend from Collegiate's rap EP. Props to you academic bro for taking initiative towards academic acheivement.
-The People Talking in the Quiet Section: Cant you see Im Tumbling??? Gawddd.
-The International Students: throwing the curve off by living in the library every night at a time.
- Candy Wrappers Left Next to Me: reminding me that the person before lacked healthy study habits, or common curtesy. Does the world want your old kit kat wrapper? What are we going to do sniff the essence of your chocolated covered wafer? No, and Maybe.
-Glasses On My Face: need to be readjusted; they be sliding down my nose like a librarian, and not the sessy kind.
-Pandora- Im still listening, and Im still in the room......
-People with complete concentration skills: I loathe you.
-Girl Who's Twirling her Hair for the Past Half-Hour: how is that possible? Is this some kind of cardio trend? Considering her facing towards a cubicle, Im guessing its not trying to entice anyone unless she's attracted to faux mahogany panels.
-The Person who Walked Behind Me: Breaking my illusion of actually focusing by making me self-concious about tumblring; a quick change from David Blaine to Gob.
-Gilt and Rue La La Apps- perusing sales pretending im buying something 70% off that I still cannot afford, but just knowing about the sale makes me feel all classy inside.
-Guy- If there is ever a casting call for Red Beard the Pirate he has the perfect mix of scariness, gingerness, and ruddy pirate swag.
-Ersatz Mac Chargers- making everyone trip over them as if they were in a very realistic ballet. Nice form on the last one. I'm betting 20 bucks a small modern dance company in Bushwick has already been inspired by this.
