Even when I keep seeking you, I still can't find you. (After the Frights one-shot) (W.I.P.)
Connor stared at a lady seated at a boba tea parlor the other side of the road.
Weird place to put that, he thought.
The lady stopped sipping her tea and turned her head at him. She then start to gave him a shining, bright uncanny smile and wave at him.
He frowned at her. “Weirdo.”
[…]
There were more people than he thought. Some even were students from Toby’s school.
Students 1: “I heard that Mr. Dillonhall got suspended for psychological abuse and neglect.”
Students 2: “Those are just rumours.”
Students 1: “But he did get suspended.”
Students 2: They rolled their eyes. "Sure."🙄
---
"Then you won't even know what to do with yourself except go cry in your room."
His brother was right. He has been doing just that since the... that day.
---
That Day’s flashback:
---
Connor's thought: "How does the French say it? Oh right.
"Connard".
He's a "Connard".
Connor the "Connard"."
(Connard = asshole, motherfucker, shithead)
[...]
He was pretty immature when he was younger.
Always having a tantrum when things didn’t go his way. He always needed to win.
Maybe that’s where Tobs gets it?
Yeah, of course it is.
Who else could it be besides his useless older brother.
He had failed since the start.
And kept at it since then.
[...]
His competitiveness got the best of him.
[...]
He's the strong older brother. Better and stronger than his little brother.
And that's why he has to protect him.
He's the oldest. He must provide for the family so there will still be a family. So, a good job he must get. He must be good. He must be great.
Their dad can't do that. He doesn't have the strength anymore. So, the job ends on him.
Connor must be good.
And that, sometimes, can be tiring.
And, sometimes, when he needed an out, Toby would end up being the target of it.
Nothing very outrageous. Just some words to rilled Tobs a bit. Because his youger brother got it easier. Because Toby was the youngest and thus, didn't have the responcibilities Connor had. And Toby was just so easy to mess with, seeing he was highly competitive.
And so, he pissed him up, because he was pissed at him for being better.
At least, that's what he thought at the time.
And then, he got busy with coleage and his job. But he would still tease Toby. They also wrestle each other. Typical brother behavior. Toby was old enough to take it. He was getting better too. Almost beat his older brother. Before his health started to fall. Before Toby started to fall.
It wasn't always for these reasons, though, right? There was an ulterior motive. Not just stress relieve.
[...]
And he taunted him. Push him to try his best. Push him to grow up and toughen up by being all smuggy and "better than him" to show him life won't go easy on him. Life isn't nice. Life is ruthless.
It may seem like a bit mean. Ok, it was mean. And that may also makes him look like a jerk, but it's the only thing he find that work. It’s the only thing he knew.
It's the only thing that seems to make Toby reach out too.
It's the only thing that seems to make Toby gets out of his stupid hole.
[...]
He had revealed he had gotten a job at Toby’s birthday.
In his mind, he thought it meant: «"Hey, look! Your brother isn’t a child anymore. You can rely on him. You don’t need to do everything alone and, I don’t know, prove anything?
His little brother didn’t seem to have taken it that way, though.
He had become more distant and obsessed over his new job at Freddy’s.
[...]
Connor to Toby's body: “You closed yourself to the world.
And the only things you let yourself peaked at is what push you to keep these walls.
But I didn’t help either, aren’t I?”
[...]
A bit of siblings rivalry never killed anyone, right?
Well, that's a f@cking lie!
That's a f@cking Bullshit!!!
[...]
Oh, Toby.
You're wrong.
Your brother isn't better.
He's a total failure.
Here's the proof, he failed you.
[...]
He knew something was wrong. His brother had look so pale. So skinny.
So frail.
He should have stayed. Call for a day off.
He should have been there for Toby.
But nooo. He had to go out.
He had to go to work.
He had to provide for the family.
And now.
Now here’s the price he has to pay.
Here’s the consequences of his incompetence.
He lost his family.
He really is a shitty brother. Could he even be called one at this point?
Was he even one?
---
Connor: “You stayed connected with her and you didn’t say anything!?”
Mr. Billings: “I didn’t keep contact with her, she contacted me herself!”
Connor: “Still! You could have said something!”
Mr. Billings: “And how do you think it would have gone, uh!? How should I have done it!? Should I had let my sons know that their mother left because she didn’t want to be one!? That she couldn’t be a mother!? What does a child would feel about that? Wouldn’t they feel left out?! Unwanted?! Do you think I would let the both of you think it was your fault that she left? Especially Toby!!??
Connor: “…”
Mr. Billings: “But… I guess... I guess that doesn’t matter anymore now, right? Because I still… Because he still felt left out... I abandoned him and now he’s…" His eyes glisten. Tears seem to grow in them.
Connor: “…”
Mr. Billings: “My baby’s gone.” Sob. “My little boy is gone and it’s my fault.” Cry.
Connor: “…” It was the first time he saw his father so vulnerable. Broken.
He never thought this man he admire could break so harshly. He knew he could crash, get hurt. But he always stood back up, even when he look so exhausted. He thought he saw the lowest his dad could get. Seems he was wrong. Once more.
And now. He couldn't say anything. He doesn't have the strength anymore.
---
Connor: “Why did you left?” He looks at his mother, expectful.
Mrs. Billings: “Tell me, Connor. What is better for a kid? Not having a mother? Or having a not happy mother? One that, each time she looks at you, she can't feel anything a mother should. She still loves you, but she can’t love you…. like a mother should love their child. How can she take care of her child? How can she be a mother, when she can’t even feel like one?”
[...]
Mrs. Billings: “Do you blame yourself?"
Connor: “What?"
Mrs. Billings: “Don't blame yourself. If you need a scapegoat, blame me. I'm the one who abandoned you all."
Connor: “You weren't there. I was! I was the one who should have done something! I was the one who should have been there for him! Encouraged him! Supported him! ...But what did I do? Nothing!
Besides being a total jerk!” (And a total failure.)
[...]
Mrs. Billings: “Toby's name was your dad's idea."
[…]
Mrs. Billings: “I could see the love he has for his little boy the moment he put his eyes on him.”
---
[Reggie: "I know I’m not the only one who saw that shadow! I asked everyone who came at Freddy’s, and some confirmed to have seen it. The actual honest one. Not those who were clearly messing with me. They weren't a lot, but they still exist! And do you know what they all have in common?"
Tabitha:"...What do they have in common? Beside looking through a mirror?"
Reggie:"A mirror? Whatever. What they all have in common is that they all played the game."
Tabitha:"…" She looks skeptical.
Reggie: "I’m not crazy! I know what I saw!"
Tabitha: "Yeah, but Toby saw it and now he's... "
Reggie looks down.
Tabitha: "I'm just worried, ok?"
Reggie: "I know. But I'm telling you, he did have a weird looking shadow following him around. Maybe that's the cause of all this-"
Tabitha: "Stop!"
Reggie closed his mouth.
Tabitha: "Just.... stop. Please."
Reggie: "...Sorry."
Tabitha sighed.
[later]
Connor hold Reggie’s shoulders, having a desperate and almost manic expression on his face. "Tell me everything you know about this shadow."
---
And there it is @hhedeuhedeudhiuduiewdihuweidhuew
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If you want to read the full one-shot:
💬 0 🔁 0 ❤️ 3 · After the Frights - Chapter 4 - Mimikyu_oli_Shyder - Five Nights at Freddy's [Archive of Our Own] · An Archive of Our Own,
