Hi friends! Just thought I’d share this with you since I like it, but it got cut from one of the chapters of Selfless choices. I’m working on the sequel now, but this is to tie you over until then! ;)
It’s dark in the dauntless training room, so dark that I’m having trouble making out Beatrice’s silhouette.
“Where are you?” I whisper.
“Right here.” She says back, her voice sounding much closer than I expected.
I reach out my arms for her and I feel her hips slide into my grip easily.
It’s amazing how much more confident I feel when we are here in dauntless together. In abnegation I wouldn’t dream of touching her like this.
She positions herself so that she’s sitting in my lap. I still can’t see her, but I can feel her and hear her breathing.
“Tobias?” her voice is quiet and filled with something I can’t quite place.
“Yeah?”
She doesn’t answer me with her voice, instead she answers me with her lips pressed insistently against mine.
I let out a soft moan as her hands push into my hair and grip tightly. I grip her hips in return and before I know it she is straddling me one leg on either side of my lap.
She pulls away from my lips but her face is still so close to mine that I can hear her breathing.
“Tobias…” She whispers.
“Beatrice…” I whisper back.
“Is this happening?” Her voice is shaky, but it’s also filled with something else…excitement and lust.
“I…I don’t know maybe…maybe we should wait.”
She presses a hand to my cheek.
“Do you want to wait?” She breathes as she leans forward, her hair tickling my face.
“Uh…”
I can’t concentrate with the way she’s kissing her way down my throat.
“B-b-beatrice.” I stutter and she pulls away again her cold fingers pressed to my shoulders.
“Yes?”
“We shouldn’t be doing this—“
“Shh…” She whispers. “Relax…we’re in dauntless.”
She’s right.
We are in dauntless.
I don’t waste any time in taking advantage of that.
I pull her close to me, my lips refusing to part from hers for any reason now. Her hands snake their way up my t-shirt and without even thinking about it my fingers are fumbling with the buttons on her t-shirt.
“Tobias…Tobias…”
I pull away again, my breathing erratic.
“You’ve got to make a decision here, Tris, eventually I’m not going to be able to keep holding off.”
She smiles a little bit.
“I know…I know…” She lets out a little sigh.
“It’s just that you have to wake up now.”
I stare at her for a moment and then shake my head slowly.
“What?” I say confusion clouding my brain.
“Wake up.” She says with a little nod.
I sit bolt up right in bed, breathing hard.
My dreams for the last two weeks have all been the exact same storyline. Tris and I doing things we would never be allowed to do in abnegation. Things that I didn’t even think I was capable of dreaming about until now.
Ever since I kissed her it’s all I can think about.
But the only opportunity we’ve had to relive that kiss unfortunately has been in my dreams.
The only time I’ve gotten to see her in the last couple of weeks has been when I go over to the Prior’s for dinner, which is twice a week.
I know she’s itching to go back into dauntless but sneaking out for me is getting increasingly harder.
Marcus is staying up later and later and I would be insane to try anything while he’s still awake.
I practically jump out of my skin when I realize that Marcus is standing in my doorway.
“G-g-good morning.” I mumble.
He stares at me, arms crossed over his chest.
“What were you dreaming about?” He asks, narrowing his eyes.
“Nothing.” I say quickly, running a hand through my hair.
He stares at me for a long moment and then he shakes his head.
“Get up. I need to speak with you about something.” He walks away quickly leaving me with a sick feeling in my stomach.
Whenever Marcus needed to talk to me, it was never anything good.
I dress at top speed and meet him downstairs in record time. He’s sitting down at the kitchen table, his eyes scanning the newspaper.
I sit down quietly opposite him and wait.
I know from experience that I should not interrupt him while he’s reading the paper.
Eventually he puts the paper down and surveys me across the table.
“I have to ask you a few questions, Tobias and I want nothing short of the truth. Alright?”
My mouth goes dry immediately but I manage to nod anyway.
“Where is it that you have been disappearing to in the middle of the night?”
Every part of me feels numb.
How did he know? How?
I shake my head slowly, my hands balling into a fist.
“I’m not sure what you mean.”
“I’ll repeat the question then,” Marcus says with a grimace. “Where is it that you go in the middle of the night?”
He says every word like it has individual importance.
I close my eyes and take a deep breath.
“I don’t…I don’t go anywhere.”
“I’m quite sure that I said the truth, Tobias but maybe you didn’t hear me.”
I clasped my sweaty hands together and lick my dry bottom lip before speaking.
“I’m sorry…” I whisper my eyes focused on the wood table in front of me.
“Sneaking out to be with a girl is hardly befitting of an abnegation member, Tobias.”
I lift my head to look at him for a moment.
To be with a girl?
He thinks I’ve been sneaking out to see Beatrice?
I mean that’s true, sort of but it’s not even the half of it.
“You’re right.” I say quickly, trying to keep the relief off of my face.
“It won’t happen again.”
“I know it won’t. I’m not going to let it happen again.” He says. “You may be courting now Tobias but that doesn’t permit you to see her at all hours of the night whenever you choose. Do you understand?”
“Yes. Understood.”
He stands up then his hands already reaching for his belt.
I have the skills to prevent this now or at least try, but I don’t think I’m ready. Not yet.
My palms are a sweaty mess and I’m dreading his belt making contact with my skin so much that I might throw up.
I have to find something else to focus on, anything else to get me through this.
