ALL GUMMED UP INSIDE
no matter how hard seungheon tries, the hole in his heart grows deeper as you feel almost unreachable. small mistakes that grow into awkward situations. but he just doesn't know how much you like him too.
DISTANT LANDS AND OTHER ADVENTURES series
PAIRING lee seungheon x fem!reader WC 2.6k TAGS adults dni. friends to lovers trope. school au. fluff. mutual pining. crying. angst if you squint. cussing. they're extremely clueless. like very clueless. OMI NOTE this series keeps producing bangers i literally could not giggle any more right now. i'm sososo proud of this so i hope all the minors (adults pls get out u weirdos) in the 8turn fandom are fed.
a void deepened in the confines of seungheon’s body, inching closer and closer to his soul. as if a foreign substance called love crawled its way to strangle him when he was most vulnerable. this feeling was constantly recurring, consuming him whole.
seeing the way your lips perked up into a fond smile when you heard a funny joke, throwing your head back in a fit of giggles. the crinkles on your forehead appearing when there’s a math question you don’t quite understand. it was impossible to look away.
of course, the endless teasing from his hyungs never faltered, but in a way he was too entranced to care. every emotion he felt was worth it to continue seeing you exist. the only shame being the mixed signals you sent. being unable to determine if the touch of your hands was a delusion, or if the spark existed.
every move he made felt like another mistake, staring hopelessly into your clueless eyes. it wasn’t you’re fault that you couldn’t catch on, but you weren’t completely oblivious. you felt it to, but random incoherent babbles came out instead of a clear ‘i like you too’
“why haven’t you just told her yet instead of trying to drop hints?” yungyu questioned, snapping seungheon out of his staring contest with the door.
“it’s not that easy dude. you’ve never had a girlfriend before, let alone a crush!” he whined, burying his face in his hands.
“you’ve never had a girlfriend either! i’m just saying if she hasn’t picked up on anything you should just flat out tell her.” yungyu suggests, ruffling the boys hair.
“i’m better off asking minho or haemin for help.” he groaned in annoyance.
“trust me, they’re going to tell you the exact same thing. take it or leave it.”
seungheon rolled his eyes, throwing a worn out eraser in his friends direction. the two boys had always been close, basically embodying a brotherly - like bond. when he wasn’t with you, he was stuck to yungyu’s side. though when all the fun passed by, he knew gyu meant well.
the weight of staring at the door, hoping you’d pop in soon, was slightly lifted off his shoulders for the mere second he was distracted. love influenced him in mysterious ways, almost making him feel silly. was this love, or an idiotic perception to mess with his head? despite this, he appreciated the first conclusion a bit more. the sound of a door sliding open interrupted his thoughts suddenly.
when you saw him, your face visibly lit up. an award - winning smile appeared on your lips as you entered all the way into the classroom. you were slugging around a heavy bag on your back, looking as if you could almost topple over. stumbling in your black mary janes, you rush to seat yourself in the empty desk next to him.
“heonie!” you inhale and exhale quickly, dropping your backpack on the floor next to you and practically falling into your seat.
“good morning, y/n!” he greets you, mood immediately much brighter after seeing you, “why such a load?”
“it’s the first day of school! and i might’ve gone overboard with school supply shopping this year?” you shrug, “but look at all these cute pencils!”
you unzip your stationery pouch, pulling out an assortment of colorful led pencils with different patterns and little animals. one of them had a cute panda with puffy cheeks on the side, with a little charm to top it all off.
“here, i got this one for you.” you take his hand suddenly, placing it in his palm. your touch was warm, sending fireworks up his arm.
“for me? i already went school supply shopping, y/n, you really didn’t have to!” he fidgets with it in his fingers.
“well yeah, but i have a matching one!” you hold out another animal themed pencil in front of his face, “see? now it can be special to you.”
“thank you then!” he grinned sheepishly, clicking the end of it to watch the led protrude from cone at the top.
“y/n, why didn’t you get me a cute pencil?” yungyu complained jokingly from the other side of seungheon’s desk.
“get a grip yungyu, you know i like heon more than you.” you scowl at him.
and on the other side of the spectrum, you and yungyu had a playful rivalry. everything was light hearted one hundred percent of the time, feeling the need to fight for seungheon’s attention. while he knew it was all friendly, his breath grew unsteady and his face began to burn at your words.
“ouch.” yungyu smirked, giving seungheon a very dramatic wink before trying to go back to whatever he was doing.
“ask yoonsung for matching stationery or something.” you recommend him.
“maybe he’ll get us some pens on top of that, better step up your game–” the loud blare of a school bell cut him off, initiating the start of classes.
turning your head from him, you took out the rest of your supplies and notebooks just in case you needed to write anything down. the rest of your classmates did the same as the teacher followed in shortly. you nudged the side of seungheon’s leg with your shoe, making him look in your direction.
‘lunch later?’ you mouthed sweetly, making him nod happily in response.
class was always a bore, long lectures giving you the most insufferable headaches ever. the teachers voice being toned out by any thought that decided to surface in your brain. each student almost looked like they were going to pass out, first days of school were like that sometimes. it was either basic instruction that you’ve already heard hundreds of times, or a review quiz.
what you mainly looked forward to in the day was lunch, like many others. this was when you got to spend most of your time with seungheon during the school day. your stomach fluttered with joy (and hunger), getting flashbacks to times when you’d sit closely to share a meal.
everyone filed out into the hallways, rushing to get to the cafeteria in time for the best food options. grabbing your backpack, you rustle through your things in search for your lunchbox. yet alas, that attempt was proven worthless as it was nowhere to be found. a groan left your throat, making your friend look over.
“did you forget your lunch at home again?” seungheon asked you, standing up from his desk.
“bro yes, how come i always do this?! that’s so lame i packed something so yummy too..” you grumble, begrudgingly slipping your arms into the sleeves of your backpack.
“jeez how can you be so adorable sometimes.” he said under his breath.
“you better be whispering about how to solve my lunch problem.” you quirk an eyebrow.
“i’ll just buy you lunch, so don’t worry about it.” he offers.
“aww heonie.” you cheer internally, “you’re too cute. i’ll make sure to pay you back tomorrow, pinky promise.”
“no it’s fine! i uh– enjoy taking care of you, so really, don’t even think about it.” he acts casually, despite his marathon - winning heartbeat.
“ah.. thank you then.” you say flustered, darting your eyes to the floor.
awkwardness soon surfaces, covering the two of you in a blanket of silence. both of your heads were reeling, trying to comprehend what flirting was and if that conversation was anything close to that. naivety often caused problems between emotional teenagers, and you were no exception.
he enjoyed taking care of you, those words rang through your head like an insufferable telephone. maybe he cared for you more than you perceived him to.
“right, let’s go before they run out of your favorite.” he breaks the tension in the air.
“wait they have my favorite today?” you perk up.
“wouldn’t want you to miss it.” he walks in front of you towards the door, leaving you to catch up behind him.
running over to meet his side, the two of you make your way down the halls to ease your hunger. you’re shoulder to shoulder with him, arms bumping together occasionally, sometimes pinkies. to you, it was mundane being this close to seungheon, but it made you feel like you needed to scream into a pillow.
the cafeteria was bursting with conversation, everyone with their established friend groups and a few lonely stragglers. still following closely behind the boy, you quickly grabbed lunch and sped off to your designated spot with trays in hand.
it was a secluded place, close to the field but not far from the school. shaded off by tall trees, leaves threatening to fall from the branches and be replaced with pungent flowers. you sat criss cross on a bench, flattening your skirt with the palms of your hands appropriately.
“i’m so hungry i could eat a whole building right now.” you rip off the plastic covering your utensils, crumpling it up and placing it under your tray.
“hey slow down, or else you’ll choke.” he cautions as you dig into your food.
“worried you’ll have to pull a heimlich on me?” you say with your cheeks stuffed.
“well i don’t want to but if i have to.” he furrows his eyebrows, making you giggle.
“you’re dumb heonie, i won’t die in front of you. i’ll probably look funny and that’s embarrassing.”
“the thing you’re worried about isn’t dying, but looking weird?” he laughs, “you’re really pretty either way, that shouldn’t be much of a concern you know.”
“pretty..?” your breath hitches slightly, the tips of your ears already beginning to burn up.
“uhm– yeah i think you’re–” he swallows, “really pretty–”
“seungheon!” a voice yells from behind him, appearing to be an eager yungyu with minho attached to him.
“i’m going to go to the bathroom real quick!” you squeak out, excusing yourself hurriedly to the bathroom. he lets out a defeated sigh.
the interrupting boys drew closer to you and seungheon’s spot at the bench, confused why he looked so out of it, and why you were walking away from him in panic. a hand landed on his shoulder reassuringly.
“why the long face, seungheon? are you okay?” minho asks, worry lingering in his tone.
“this is just stupid. i can’t keep pushing this down any deeper.” he frowns, “but why do i keep trying if i can’t reach her?”
“what happened exactly?” minho wonders.
“i– i called her pretty and then she rushed to the bathroom out of no where.” he runs a hand through his hair.
“maybe she just really had to pee?” yungyu tries to comfort, earning a light punch on the arm from minho.
“i don’t even know anymore. i am genuinely desperate to know what it’ll take to finally be with her.”
“telling her straight up is what will probably work the best right now seungheon..” minho told the distressed boy.
“see, i told you!” yungyu added.
“are you guys.. completely positive that will work. because otherwise this feeling is going to consume me whole waiting for this thing to start.” he pleads with his friends.
“positive.” they both say simultaneously.
“okay, fine. then how do you guys suggest i do it?” seungheon gives in.
“whenever she comes back from the bathroom, just say you have something to tell her and lay it out. no use waiting anymore.” minho proposed a plan simply.
“i’ve seen the way she looks at you seungheon, i promise she’ll like you back.” yungyu pat seungheon on the back.
“alright.” seungheon said hesitantly, “you guys better get out before she gets back, or else she’ll think i’m plotting something.”
“aww that’s my little underclassman.” minho pat his head.
“dude don’t be corny..” yungyu gives him a disgusted look, minho mirroring it almost exactly.
“just go! i think she’s coming back.” seungheon swats them away, visibly paranoid.
they trot away quickly, leaving seungheon alone with his thoughts. everything he’s imagining gets notably louder as he waits for your figure to appear back around the corner, borderline hallucinating any movement. this wasn’t anything he’s ever done before, you were his first crush after all.
and because of that, maybe there was more pressure to see whether you reciprocated his feelings or not. first loves never seemed to go away no matter how hard anyone tried, and he doesn’t want to have to imagine you absent in his life.
once you finally do come back, his stomach is doing somersaults, and his heart palpitating. theres still a slight blush on your face when you sit down on the creaky bench, soon meeting his eyes once you’re fully settled down.
“hi, i’m sorry if i took awhile!” you brush off, twiddling your thumbs together, “what did minho and yungyu want?”
“oh! it’s not that important but um, i wanted to talk to you about something.” seungheon brings up, hands shaking slightly in his lap.
“of course, whats up?” you respond nervously.
“for the longest time, you’ve been one of the closest friends in my life.” he started, “and the last thing i would want is to ruin anything between us.”
“are you saying you don’t want to be friends anymore..?” you almost choke out.
“what? oh my gosh, y/n, no! well, yes but–” he pauses, reaching over your trays to take hold of your hand, “i like you a lot. and it’s kind of been killing me every time i drop a hint that goes unnoticed.”
your lips part like you’re about to say something, but no words come out. instead tears begin to well up in your eyes and your bottom lip quivers, making it painfully obvious that you’re about to cry. a droplet falls from your eye, immediately making seungheon’s eyes widen in horror.
“y/n! please don’t cry i– i didn’t know you were going to react like this i’m so sorry!” he raised his hands to cup your face, wiping your under eye to rid it from any tears.
“seungheon..” you sob out, leaning into his palm, “i didn’t think you were going to like me back.”
“why wouldn’t i like you– wait what?”
“i thought you were just being nice this whole time, i had no clue how to react and– i wasn’t sure how to make it obvious that i liked you.” you sniffed, “that’s why i got us pencils, they even had little hearts next to the panda..”
“and i thought i wasn’t being obvious.” he smiles at your words.
“heonie!”
“i’m kidding. god we’re so stupid aren’t we.”
“maybe a little bit.. but you’ve had me teetering on the edge all day! first you say you liked taking care of me, then you bought me lunch, then you called me pretty?!” you mentally facepalm.
“at least thank minho and yungyu for knocking some sense into me, i was probably going to walk you home next.” he remembered the rest of his plans he had in stow.
“you can still walk me home today..” you stammer, head still resting in the comfort of his hands.
“i wouldn’t plan on having it any other way.” he sighs with relief, stroking away any remaining tears.
“there is one thing we’re missing though!” you mention suddenly.
“bro was i supposed to get you flowers..?” he gasps, moving his hands away to dig for a makeshift gift in his backpack.
you bring his head back to you, placing a soft peck on his lips. it was something new he’s never exactly felt before, but he wouldn’t have it with anyone other than you.
“now we are official. that’s how couples solidify things, right?”
© 2023 minkkumaz, all rights reserved support your writers by reblogging + giving feedback! it is greatly encouraged and appreciated. thank you! → why feedback + reblogging is so important. ~ (´｡• ᵕ •｡`) ♡ if you'd like, donate to minkkumaz !
DISTANT LANDS AND OTHER ADVENTURES series