Hiiiiiiiii :)
If you've got any advice for Shadow and/or Amy (as a couple or individuals) what would it be and why?
HELLOOOOO! <3
I've been mulling over this question. Truthfully, I think that the advice I can/would give them is... the same I'd give most people, and the advice I'd give to a single person is pretty much the same as advice I'd give to a couple. As such, you can take these in any fashion: for one, for both, together, individually.
-Your partner should also be one of your best friends. Never forget this. That means beyond whatever romance or sexual attraction or anything else, the love that you have for them should run deeper still. This is your comrade in arms, your confidant, and you are theirs. No matter what happens, always remember this.
-The gentleness you grant to others can, and should, be granted to yourself, either by you or by others.
-Take the time to check in, both with yourself and with your partner. Make sure you're working together rather than against. Make sure you're there to support. Make sure you are present for both rest and play.
-There's a difference between hearing someone and listening to them. Make sure you do more of the latter than the former.
-There is always something to learn; about yourself, about each other, about the world around you. Always make a point to learn.
-When in doubt, speak. If you can't speak, act. If you can't do that either, wait. It's not a crime to gather your thoughts. (Also doesn't hurt to write what you're trying to get across down in a letter.)
-Being direct is not a crime. Ask your questions. State your thoughts and feelings. Let others feel comfortable enough with you to do the same. Your relationships, and your life in general, will be significantly better for it.
-Make sure you keep up with your relationships outside of your partnership. Call your friends and family, make a point to see them, stay involved. Too often, people get absorbed into their own world of two (or more), and that's not healthy.
-Actions will always speak louder than words... but words are very, very good, too. Make sure you try and verbalize your love and appreciation when you are able.
-If you think people are lying to you, for whatever reason, take a moment and ask yourself, 'What do they have to gain for lying?' If you can't come up with any answer, then you have to trust that they're most likely not lying.
-Your friends and loved ones are not 'putting up with you.' They care about you, even if or when you do not care about yourself. Do not be so cruel to yourself as to doubt them, and do not be so cruel to them in your second guessing of their character.
-You're not a monster. There are no such things as monsters. There are just people, and last I checked, you're a person. That gives you the beautiful capacity to grow and change. Grant yourself, and others, that chance. (And when pressed, if you find yourself in a position where you thoroughly thrash someone's ass for not taking that chance that you have gave them, you're still not a monster.)
-You have every right to love and every right to hate. You are allowed to feel both things. They're largely two sides of the same coin. What you must be aware of is how you let those emotions fuel your actions. Make sure those actions leave the world and those around you better than you found them.
-No matter what happens, you have each other. Trust one another to be there.