I'm reading a book called Shameless Exploitation; In Pursuit of the Common Good that I got from a book fair which has to do with Salad Dressing.
Paul Newman and A.E. Hotchner are the writers and the subjects of the story and lemme recite my favorite excerpts so far;
• "Whenever I do something good, right away I've got to do something bad so I know I'm not going to pieces.- Paul to Joanne right after he fell out of the tree house, Beverly Hills, California, 1985" pg 13, chapter 2
• "Hotch: Uh-huh. And how do you see us in this restaurant? PL: Oh, I'd tend the bar and you'd be the Jolly Greeter. Hotch: Uh-huh, people are going to come from all over to be at the bar with this famous movie actor, sitting there with their martinis, taking close-ups with their Instamatics, clinking glasses with the superstar, that it? PL: Pretty picture, isn't it? Hotch: Uh-huh. Well, how about this picture? In comes a party of eight oystermen and their wives, all permed and perfumed for the occasion, a couple of rounds of martinis, then the eight oystermen go to the Jolly Greeter and say, "Where is the superstar bartender we have come all the way from Gloucester to clink a glass with?" Oh, says the Jolly Greeter, at the moment he's sunning himself, in between takes, on the beach at Bali-Bali. Sorry. Whereupon the eight oystermen, having come all the way from Gloucester with their permed and perfumed wives, kick the be-jesus out of the Jolly Greeter. PL: Well, Hotch, there's a price for everything." pages 16-17, chapter 3, about opening a restaurant
• " "Well, kid," said the Godfather behind the desk, "we'll spring for the olive oil and we split fifty-fifty, but we got to go with the Umbria name, not this-what'd you call it?" "Newman's Own." "No, you ain't." "I'll let you know." "What's to know? We got a deal." "I've got to talk to Newman." "Why?" "He's my partner." "Call him up." "I can't bother him now." "Why not?" "His doctor says he's dying." "Call him up." "Right! I've got his number in the car. I'll be right back." There are still track marks from the 'Vett's rubber, bearing indelible testimony to Hotch's frightened foot on the throttle." Page 22, chapter 4, Hotch is meeting with a mayonnaise bottler trying to get Newman's Own salad dressing bottled properly. Honestly, the entire Mayonnaise scene (as I'm calling it) is great but I'm not writing all that.
• Chapter 5 dishonorable mention to drunken horse guy. If you know you know.
Overall, the chapters are short, and the writing is a little clunky at times, but it's endearing so far as these men, an actor and his writer buddy, stumble haphazardly through getting this salad dressing biz off the ground.
Also Sawtooth Homestuck shares that name with A.E. Hotchner, who was sometimes called Sawtooth.