#shinjaee

[eyeglitched]

@shinjaee sent 💉💉 to find my muse drugged and tied to a chair after being tortured and missing

How  long  has  he  been  here?  It  was  impossible  to  tell.  He  didn't  hear  the  announcements  here.  There  were  no  windows.  No  way  to  know.  He  didn't  ask.  For  the  last  few....  however  long,  Eito  had  seen  fit  to  stop  speaking  at  all.  He  hadn't  moved  from  this  spot  in  a  long  time.  His  coat,  gloves,  and  glasses  had  all  been  removed  some  time  ago.  The  only  time  he  was  moved  out  of  this  chair  was  to  hose  him  off  with  the  ice  cold  water  by  the  revive-o-matic.  Sometimes  he  was  allowed  to  soap.  Sometimes  he  wasn't.  By  now,  even  moving  his  arms  to  try  to  clean  himself  was  beyond  difficult.

Eito  had  spent  almost  every  waking  moment  of  his  life  in  the  TRC  confined  in  a  hospital.  No  privacy.  Always  under  the  watchful  eye  of  monsters  that  wanted  to  harm  him.  To  break  him.  He  had  learned  how  to  act.  How  to  pretend.  It  was  for  survival.  To  prevent  them  from  touching  him.  From  strapping  him  down  and  shoving  needles  into  his  skin.  Eito's  pride  had  been  trampled  on  back  then.  And  when  he  got  here,  he  had  been  thrown  in  a  cage.  But  at  least  he  had  his  mind.  He  had  himself.  He  wasn't  being  forced  to  take  pills  to  dull  his  wits.  He  wasn't  being  watched  and  touch.  How  could  he  have  ever  thought  it  could  be  worse  than  the  hospital?

He  didn't  know  if  Takumi  had  ordered  it.  If  he  even  knew  about  it.  Eito  had  tried  to  slip  out  of  his  cage  and  he  was  caught.  Everything  from  that  point  on  was...  Was....

.................................

Eito  fought  at  first.  And  then  he  decided  to  pretend  to  break.  But  once  they  started  drugging  him,  he  couldn't  focus  enough  for  that.  The  drugs  dulled  his  mind  more  than  anything  he  had  been  given  at  the  hospital.  Or  maybe  it  was  the  machine  shocking  him,  forcing  him  into  seizures  again  and  again.  Maybe  that  was  what  had  given  him  brain  damage.  His  muscles  ached  from  the  spasms.  The  restraints  too,  left  dark  bruises  on  his  skin.  He  had  barely  eaten  and  drank  anything.  He  had  started  to  refuse  food  some  time  ago.  The  drugs  made  him  feel  sick.  It  didn't  matter.  It  was  forced  down  his  throat  regardless.

All  it  was  for  him  was  pain,  the  worst  pain  he  had  ever  been  in,  drugged  out  of  lucidity,  sometimes  woken  up  by  the  cold  water  or  questions  that  he  would  lie  about  if  he  could  think.  His  brain  felt  like  wet  cotton  in  his  head.  His  tongue  was  heavy.  His  limbs  felt  like  sandbags.  The  only  time  he  was  painfully  aware  was  the  first  few  seconds  the  electricity  shot  through  his  body.

When  someone  says  his  name,  a  voice  distorted  that  he  can't  even  remember...  It  brings  him  back  for  a  second.  He  can't  think  straight.  Or  really...  At  all.  His  head  is  so  foggy.  Without  his  coat,  it  was  clear  to  see  all  the  needle  marks  in  his  neck.

"Ah....?"  He  can't  focus  his  eyes.  All  he  sees  is  blue.  A  monster,  he  knows.  But...  It's  too  unclear  to  make  out  anything.  Like  someone  spilled  blue  ink  on  a  piece  of  paper.  His  lips  move.  He  can't...  Get  the  words  out.  His  eyes  focus  for  a  second,  he's  back  in  the  hospital.  The  person  in  front  of  him...  He  can't  tell  who  or  what  they  are.  But  if  someone  is  here  then...

Another  shot  or  more  "therapy".  They're  fixing  him.  That's  exactly  what  they  told  him  before.  This  isn't  the  hospital.  This  is.......  If  he  could  focus  his  eyes,  if  he  could  string  together  words,  if  he  could  think...  Eito  was  very  resistant  to  most  drugs.  Whatever  they  had  been  shooting  into  him  was....  So  strong.  And  the  torture  also....

"Not..."  He  feels  like  a  child  again.  At  the  whims  of  the  people  trying  to  fix  his  brain.  More  intense  than  before,  sure  but...  He  doesn't  want  another  shot.  He  doesn't.  He  doesn't.  He  doesn't  want  to  be  'treated'  again  either.  "again........."

This  wasn't  Sirei  or  Nigou  but...  Who?  He  knew  the  others  were  probably  all  in  on  it.  He  shuts  his  eyes.  The  only  thing  he  can  smell  is  ozone.  Not  whatever  is  in  front  of  him.  His  eyes  won't  focus.  His  pride  was  in  tatters.  He  didn't  want  to  rely  on  a  human.  But...  but  but  but  but....

"How  much....?"  He  couldn't  speak.  This  wasn't  real  anyway.  He  shut  his  eyes,  the  world  spun  and  he  felt  like  he  might  throw  up.  Maybe  if  they  gave  him  another  shot,  he'd  die.  At  this  point  it's....

".........  longer...?"

[azureblitzed]

@shinjaee

It hadn't even been that long since he had made the call for Aotsuki Eito to not be added back to the Special Defense Unit. Takumi worried that it would divide the team at this critical stage. He still couldn't bring himself to trust Eito after everything. Even though... He could still see it when he closed his eyes. The wounds on Eito's face.

Why would he do that to himself...? It wasn't just to manipulate us. His eyes were...

Eito had learned about their false memories and taken it much worse than he had expected. Maybe Takumi hadn't stopped to consider how awful living the way Eito had was. He couldn't even attempt to understand. Maybe part of him refused to. How could he understand something so different from his own experience? But now that he was thinking about it... Cutting out your eyes... Eito's false life must have been torture.

He had expected to let Eito stay in the cage for the remaining 100 days. He wouldn't be allowed unlimited freedom but... He would be able to stay until they went back into space. So when Sirei and Eito himself insisted he leave....

Maybe he should have protested. But he didn't How would he survive out there blind? What would he do? Where would he go? Regret was far from unfamiliar to him but... This was awful. Guilt. He wished he could undo it. Go back and...

He sighs and gets out of bed. He couldn't sleep like this. Maybe he should go for a walk to clear his head. He slips his hoodie on and his jacket. Gets dressed slowly and clumsily. His body felt heavy, weighed down by guilt and regret.

The only other person in the unit that seemed off after Eito left was Darumi. Which.... was surprising. He wandered the darkened hallways of the school until he went to the courtyard. The sight of the empty cage reminded him how guilty he felt. He was surprised to see Darumi in the courtyard too. He knew she was a night owl, unlike him.

She was the only other person that cared. Maybe he could confide in her. And if she lashed out for his choice, even better. It would be better than the horrible silence the others gave him regarding it.

"Amemiya...? Are you thinking about Aotsuki?" He asks quietly.

[azureblitzed]

Darumi Amemiya ( @shinjaee ) said: ❛ we’re meant to die. it's natural. ❜

THE HAUNTING OF BLY MANOR

She was right. Still... Takumi could still remember how much it hurt. Holding Nozomi in his arms as her body went limp. Ima crying out before he was killed. The boy in the defense room being drained of his life. His sword digging into Eito... Maybe it was the horror of it more than mercy that made him spare Eito this time. Death was natural. It was a part of life.

But it hurt so much... Takumi couldn't bear it. Too heavy. It cut too deeply. To come back to the past to save them all... And then fail so quickly...

They had arrived back before Darumi had been completely drained of her hemoanima. If Takumi would have been a little slower, what would have happened? Even if she was someone he couldn't understand... She still fought by his side for those 100 days. He didn't understand her yet, but as long as they were both alive... Someday he could. But she was hand waving his concern and it angered him. Grief is a wound that bleeds and bleeds. What do you do when your wounds are no longer real to anyone but you? When the scars remain after the wound had been erased from history?

"Enough, Amemiya!" His voice comes out harsher than he expected. "I don't CARE. I'm not letting you die either. No matter what it takes, I will save you!" The words might end up being hollow. Maybe it was wishful thinking. But Takumi wanted to believe he could do it. "We aren't MEANT to die....! Just because someday we will..." Maybe he shouldn't let her rile him up. Darumi was always saying things that made people react badly. This was no different... But she had almost died.

"You need to rest. I'll have someone bring you meals until you recover. Or I'll do it. Whatever. But... Even if you don't remember the other timeline, we're comrades. So I'm not letting you die."

[azureblitzed]

@shinjaee said: if you die on me , i'm going to be pissed off.

"Amemiya..." Takumi manages to force her name out through clenched teeth. He could feel warm blood seeping between his fingers. It hurt. It hurt so bad he could barely take it. He didn't even want to look down at his stomach.

They had been trying the find the secret to the Retsnom. Where to locate it had been tricky. And despite their many outings, they rarely ran into much trouble. Until now.

He had put his body between her and an invader. She managed to finish it off after the claws dug so deeply into his stomach that he thought it might have sliced it open. He couldn't even move without searing hot pain paralyzing him. He hated that she would feel guilty about it. But if any of them deserved to die... It was him.

"I... I'll just..." He choked on his own blood. His own wet coughs sounded deadly. It hurt so much. "S-slow you down... I won't.... make it...." Unless they could drastically slow the bleeding enough that he could be revived once they reached the school. But even that was a slim chance.

"Sorry... I... I can't..."

[eyeglitched]

@shinjaee said: "Has anyone ever tried it on you?"

"I have had multiple medical professionals try similar tactics."

[eyeglitched]

@shinjaee: 🪢 Wrap a makeshift tourniquet around the receiver’s thigh.

A  scream  tore  out  of  Eito's  throat.  It  only  lasted  a  second  before  he  clenched  his  teeth  together  so  hard  that  it  felt  like  they  may  crack.  He  was  used  to  pain.  He  wasn't  the  sort  to  scream  or  cry  from  any  old  injury.  Eito  had  suffered  more  than  most.  Put  through  treatments  that  violated  him  in  every  way  down  to  the  most  fundamental  parts  of  his  spirit.  He  was  usually  so  careful  in  combat.  But  maybe  being  around  all  of  these  horrific  beasts  was  starting  to  take  its  toll  on  him.

They  weren't  too  far  from  school  grounds,  but  he  couldn't  be  revived  if  he  fell  here.  It  was  a  small  party.  Takumi,  Tsubasa,  Darumi,  and  himself.

His  vision  was  always  blurry  due  to  his  glasses,  but  the  vision  of  his  leg  was  crystal  clear  to  him.  He  knew  without  looking  that  it  was  severe.  The  edges  of  his  vision  darkened  but  he  could  see  blood  pouring  out  of  his  leg.  It  was  nearly  severed  above  the  knee.

He  swallowed  a  mouthful  of  vomit.  His  body  shifted  quickly  from  hot  to  cold.  All  of  him  shook  violently.  He  was  going  into  shock.  If  they  were  on  school  grounds,  this  would  be  a  simple  matter  of  dying  and  coming  back.  It  was  more  complicated  now.  It  would  be  better  if  he  wasn't  surrounded  by  idiots.

Takumi  finished  off  the  invader  that  attacked  him  and  was  quickly  getting  in  his  personal  space.  There  was  a  noise.  More  enemies.  He  could  see  the  grotesque  creature  run  with  sword  in  hand  to  counter  them.  He  could  already  hear  Tsubasa's  disgusting  sounds.  His  head  spun.

Shaking  so  much  that  his  attempt  at  speaking  fell  out  in  stuttering  intelligible  noises,  he  couldn't  do  much  aside  from  lay  there  and  bleed.  Tsubasa  and  Takumi  fought.  Darumi  kneels  at  his  side.  he  doesn't  want  her  near  him.  His  awful  hands  venture  closer.  He  vaguely  remembered  her  and  the  others  exchanging  words.

"W-wait..."  She  doesn't  hear  him  or  doesn't  listen.  She  pulls  off  his  belt  and  Eito  swallows  a  scream.  Her  filthy  disgusting  ROT  was  flooding  into  the  injury.  He  could  practically  FEEL  it  as  she  wrapped  the  belt  around  his  thigh  to  slow  the  bleeding.  Pus  falls  into  his  wound  and  he  just  knows  he's  going  to  get  an  infection.  He  tries  to  swallow  the  disgust.  To  keep  his  mask  on.  But  in  this  state,  the  horrible  monster's  claws  reaching  toward  him  make  him  flinch.

"Nng...  Don't...  TOUCH  me..."  He  chokes  out  through  agonized  labored  breaths.  All  he  can  hope  for  is  to  be  brought  back  in  range  of  the  drones  before  he  loses  his  life.

Her  eyes  dig  into  him  and  he  wants  nothing  more  than  to  tear  them  out  of  her  skull.  He  screws  his  own  eyes  shut  and  tries  to  remind  himself  that  he  WILL  kill  them.  He  just  has  to  bear  it  and  survive  this  moment.

[azureblitzed]

@shinjaee said: 🦴 Snap the receiver’s dislocated shoulder back into place.

Takumi should know better than to react before his mind has a chance to catch up. Sadly, that did not happen today. With the numbers they had, the battle was intense. A lot of enemies swarmed them. Nozomi had been forced to retreat, which left only himself and Darumi here. He had failed to protect Nozomi. So when an invader charged at an exhausted Darumi who didn't see it coming, Takumi moved quickly to intercept it.

He blocked the attack with his sword. The force sent him back and he crashed onto the ground. He landed badly. He didn't feel the initial hit that much. He cried out, sure... But the pain never reached his awareness. When he tried to grab hold his sword, he couldn't move his arm. Instead waves of dizzying pain shot through his arm. It paralyzed him as he gasped pathetically against it. It was so bad that his vision darkened and he felt sick to his stomach.

Knives rained down on the invader before it reached him. Sparing him the killing blow it was certainly aiming to deliver. That was the last one in their area for now.

"Amemiya... Ah... I... I can't..." He felt like if he kept talking, he might throw up. She lowered herself to his side. The pain was horrible. He couldn't move his arm almost at all without enough pain to make him nearly scream.

Her hands took hold of him. And for a second, panic attacks him as he worries she might hurt him worse by accident. A small plea falls out of his lips before she suddenly moves his shoulder.

Takumi screamed more than when he fell. The pain that shoots through him makes him black out for a second, slumping against the girl as he weakly fights to stay awake against it. And in a few moments, it feels better. Much better. He's still panting and sweating as he looks up at her. Blinking away the tears the pain had summoned, he realizes dimly that he must have dislocated his shoulder. He'd seen it in movies but never guessed how painful it actually was.

"T-thanks..."

[eyeglitched]

❤️❤️ -[r0 @shinjaee bc thats more upsetting]

Muse Trust Test! / @shinjaee ( ❤❤ I could let my guard down and fall asleep in your presence and feel safe.)

"The feeling is mutual Darumi-san!" Disgusting! As if he'd ever want to see this vile creature sleep. At least she might be quiet instead of spitting out those shrill, ear-splitting shrieks she always let out. Her laugh made him want to bash her head into the wall until her brains were leaking out of her misshapen skull. But he'd prefer to not even touch her! She needed to get away from him. It made him sick to be so close. He felt sick.