Title: Love more, hurt more
Pairing: Shirazu/Urie
Sypnosis: Urie doesn’t think he can go through it a third time (and he better hadn’t).
“Its always the one who love more that hurt more.” - He dragged himself into this whirl of emotions. God, he hated himself.
Urie had never wanted to go through death a second time. He’d sworn upon his deceased father he’d keep his emotions in check while working as an investigator. Forever.
Yet, those locked up feelings still ended up being released… just for Urie to be crushed a second time by his own helplessness. Only this time, it felt much, much worse.
It’s been three months since then. Shirazu’s wounds had already fully recovered, yet the damned guy just wouldn’t wake up. The doctor had concluded that it was because he thought he was dead. “It’d take some time,” he had said.
“Well, screw that shit,” Urie was flaring – he always did when he recalled that doctor’s face. What good is he if he couldn’t even save Shirazu? He did all the damned work of recovering himself!
Urie forced his lips into a thin line as he held out his pass to the guards outside Shirazu’s hospital room. It was a standard procedure, even though nearly everyone in the hospital recognises him. He did come every day without fail, after all.
Today, Urie noticed something off about the guards. They were more stiff and were biting their lips the way he was. Neither met Urie’s eyes.
(You’ve got to be fucking kidding me…)
His expression did a 360; his brows creased together, his eyes narrowed and his kakugan formed the way it did when Urie was at the end of his rope. With a cry he knocked both the guards out in a punch and bust the door open.
Empty.
(No!)
What the fuck was this shit? Didn’t they say Shirazu would be OK? Didn’t they say his condition was stabilizing and that ‘there was nothing to worry about’? Wasn’t Urie promised the best care for him?
So why?!
“Who the fuck allowed you to fucking die a second time?!”
“Huh? Who died a second time?”
(What?)
Was Urie hearing things? God, he’s gone insane. Urie Kuki was hallucinating about a guy he’d wanted dead for so long! The change was hilariously drastic that he howled with laughter.
(How pathetic.)
“O-Oi, Uriboy… you 'kay?”
(Stop it.) Just… stop it. Urie could practically feel Shirazu’s warmth, hear his imaginary footsteps.
A tap on the shoulder had Urie jumping and he slashed at the arm as he did a turnabout.
And there he was.
“Woah, you wanna go?! When I’m feelin’ like shit?!”
“…” Urie didn’t reply; he was too stunned to. His mouth was gaping open. At the sight, Shirazu cocked his head. Urie never really did show any expressions other than anger and disgust at him before. But now he looked... strangely relieved.
“Uribo...” Whatever Shirazu wanted to say was cut off by Urie’s unexpectedly strong hug. He squeezed so tight Shirazu could barely breathe, as though he was trying to confirm this was real. Was he?
Thank God he’s still alive.
“...Urie, are you actually... crying?” Shirazu’s voice was filled with disbelief.
“Shut the fuck up, Shirazu,” Urie’s vision was blurry, but he managed to grab at Shirazu’s hospital gown and gave him an over shoulder throw, straddling him before he even hit the floor. “Why the heck did you leave your room?! I thought you were fucking...”
(Dead.) Urie’s lips trembled at the thought of the word.
“Fuck, that hurt. I was just thirsty and there wasn’t any water in the room, so I wanted to get som...”
“You could’ve asked one of those fucking guards outside to do it for you! Why did you have to go out yourself?! You just recovered! What if you...”
(Collapse a second time?!) Urie bit on his lips so hard it begun to bleed. It stung, and the burning in his chest told him this was real.
“Fuck, Urie...!” Shirazu forced himself into an upright position and slapped both hands onto either side of Urie’s cheeks, forcing their eyes to meet.
“Look at me. I’m here.”
“...!” The kiss came almost naturally. As though they’d done it thousands of time. As though they weren’t at each other’s throats for as far as they could remember. Shirazu licked away the blood on Urie’s lips, causing him to shudder.
It was suddenly awkward when their lips parted. Urie’s vision blurred again; it wasn’t the tears this time. (Oh.)
“Sorry, Shirazu.”
“Yeah, you’d better be damned sorry for throwing a pati...”
“Not for that.”
“Then what for?”
“This.” Urie’s eyes rolled to the back and Shirazu caught him just in time.
“Shit, don’t do that...” He bumped his forehead against Urie’s. “Thank you for taking care of me the past three months.”