#silend's thoughts

[silendastral]

Well, that's it - 3 days ago I turned 21. What does this give me? Uh, considering that I don't smoke or drink, and I've had to save for a car for 100 years, then formally nothing has changed.

From the new one, I can note that two years later I decided to try to play Cars: Race-o-Rama. I'm exploring map. I was surprised that you can go inside the factory ::::0

AND THIS IS THE GREEN FUCKER DO ROBOTS OUT OF HIS STUDENTS!? WHY WASN'T HE SENT TO PRISON?

I LOVE HIM AND TRY TO ANALYZE HIS PERSONALITY. BUT THIS MOMENT IN THE GAME FOR ME FEELS LIKE I WAS IN THE SAFEST PLACE, AND I STILL MANAGED TO GET HIT BY A TRUCK. I even made a meme about that:

Sorry, two identical pictures... Btw, El Machismo i can call "pookie". He really has huge ambitions, he just got involved with a bad person. I wrote in one reblog that he, as one of the hypostases of Chick, is an eternal desire to achieve something more than he already has. And their characters generally converge, it's just that Machismo is more emotional. They could really become good friends. But we all know how Chick (doesn't) know how to be friends.

This type of characters resonate with me so much, they may have really tried their best, and then get very upset that they didn't try hard enough. Poor big meow meow ::::(

Monster truck mayhem... I, maybe the problem is that I played on an emulator, maybe it has always been like this, but AAAAARH, try to enter drift on huge wheels and there is always a chance THAT YOU WILL START SPINNING, AND YOU WILL GENERALLY GO IN THE OPPOSITE DIRECTION. This is especially noticeable at the races in a Rusty bucket. But it's much easier to deal with in Autovia!

It's funny for me to come up with something in my head during the races, because, well, the authors themselves did not decide to bother with all this. For example, I hc that The Crippler dislikes Lightning after the events in the first game.

In the summary of each race in the case of trucks, Doc literally behaves with McQueen like this meme (Translation: "Beat that one")

And for some reason, when I playing on the keyboard, drift works for me only on the right side... It's fun to play Race-o-Rama... And painful for me...

[silendastral]

🐑 Silend/Randall │ (Any pronounces) │ 22 (Nov 18th) 🐑 Other socials: Twitter (Minors DNF)│ Toyhouse │ Hipolink Telegram - https://t.me/SilendAstralYoYo / @SilendoAstralo (DM)

- Ukrainian-Russian. - Artist. Student architect (don't ask anything about it - I'm an idiot) - Undiagnosed ADHD, please be patient. - I'm not proshipper or anti. Dark stuff can be interesting for analyzing. Real crimes are not justified, and their victims should not be forgotten. I welcome violence only in drawings and with symbolism.

☕️ Current hyperfixation: Red dead redemption and No Means Nothing. ☕️ Other hyperfixation: Spooky Month, Pizza Tower, Super Mario, Pokemon Sun and Moon, Encanto, Warframe, Cars, MLP, Bully, GTA 5. ☕️ Interests: Psychology, biology, BUGS, videogames, true crime videos.

Tags:

[silendastral]

Silend: "I want Dr. Damage!" Mother: "Honey, we already have Dr. Damage at home." Dr. Damage at home:

He's unstable, seems grumpy and just a terrible person. But I like him. I just feel that most likely he complains about the rest of the ambulances and doctors in general, while he himself managed to lose his license due to mistakes in the past. And I also like that monster trucks do this thing:

Although if we think about it, it's scary to think that you're trying to hide from monster truck, hiding where the ceiling is supposed to be such that they won't pass, AND THEY BENDS DOWN. + Silly bonus: If I say that I love characters so much that I'll just devour them, then it will look exactly like this:

If he was real, he'd probably run me over for headcanons, which I thought up.

[silendastral]

- Thinking about scars that Cliff has. Most of them was made by clumsy himself, and only few by someone (one-sided Glasgow smile; removed appendix).

- Also as brain "eat itself" if sleeps not 8 hours, then Clifford kinda got degradation, which is not cool with whole his medical book...

- RGB Trio (MqRoni with the Chicken Strips) feels like 3 brothers from Slavic tales.

- Chick is cat fr. Also "copycat" it's sooooo him.

- Thinking that the Queens as 2 united twins (like Barry and Vince, Sonny and Lenny) somehow terrifying me. Like if it was like that in my fan on, then their parents was really shitty-

- If it's how my past affects me, but in theory Queens gang singing rockabilly or something like that. But if people asks me what kinda vibe they gives for me? UUUUMMMM, RUSSIAN RAP/HIP-HOP-

- I never seen that people do redesigns for Pixar cars, lmao. I think that's very awesome in the way, that fandom really love cars as they are.

MEANWHILE ME THINKING ABOUT THIS SKIN-

(Golf/American Football boy)

I think someone from game series really need little redesign or at least add few details (where tf The Cripplers doors- I need more things with I can do jokes).

[silendastral]

Just babbling with myself.

Personally, it's kind of funny for me to watch some drawing tutorials after a while.

There are really good ones that explain the subtleties of some points and the variability of bodies, how fat is distributed and something like that.

And there are those who say, "WELL, YOU SHOULD DRAW LIKE <THAT>, BUT NOT LIKE >THAT<, BECAUSE IT'S WRONG." Why is it wrong to have wide hips and a small waist? Suddenly, the character has such a distribution of fat in the lower part of a body, and the upper fat almost does not affect? (in any case, I'm judging by myself here). Or why you so bother that artist maybe love the shape of a vase???

All sorts of small moments like adam's apple. Everyone has it, yes, it's just more pronounced for males in most cases, but this does not mean that it will be smooth for ALL women.

Physiques sound like a separate pain in the difference between the sexes, so I thank those artists who make the division: lean, normal and a couple of variations of a larger package.

"- Silend, then why you don't make a normal tutorials?"

Maybe because I'm still learning anatomy and render myself, and I don't want people to spread any misinformation, huh? /sarcasm

Aaand because I'm a graphomaniac and I want to find a bunch of references that I can rely on.

[silendastral]

Slowly working on rdr OC reference when in the same time fighting with idea I'm a damn cringe and drawing uh... Kind of plagiat? Can't explain and RAGH I don't wanna ask the person with other OC about "I hope our characters doesn't look similar because of *many causes*, but if it's like that maybe I can change something" And other stuff which maybe gonna kill me as a respectful member in this fandom, bruh. Like, um, I can try one day maybe draw something like a gift? I just don't wanna feel like plagiator just because we can like similar traits and etc. during making our characters. I just was unlucky to post in the same time/earlier because of university stuff.

Here pieces of work and I still thinking if should I add frames with small details or not.

(Also coloring sketch with lasso it's kinda relaxing ::::0)

[silendastral]

Sitting in academy is kinda weird today because my brain in random moment decide explain why it likes problematic characters from media.

In short - JUST BECAUSE THEY HAVE INTERESTING TRAITS IN PERSONALITY, AND NOT ONLY CRIMES, AND BECAUSE THEY DON'T EXIST IRL, YO.

Every violence only in art have it's value and meaning, while in real life is the most disturbing shit and just a mess.

I will fight with people who think if I love problematic characters - it means I problematic myself. Ask my friends and you get answer that I'm comfort and time to time lazy chatterbox. If we have problem, that it's a dark humor not more not less.

You love Micah Bell, who's traitor! - yes. But hell in RDR nobody is saint. "He's rapist!" - I have the damn question - WHERE? He in stagecoach robery where also we have Bill, said that he didn't put the gun to lady's head, because he can let himself just take pay for escort. When he tell to folks about his brother, Micah says that nobody can't command him besides woman who said to him 'get lost' (or how it in original, cuz I play with Russian language).

"He's racist!" - yaaaa, but everytime he says something weird he get punched or landing heavily on the ground. Besides he somehow befriends with Javier. I know it's can be caused by manipulation and etc, but drunk people most of the time says what they think.

Jimmy from Mouthwash is the weirdest guy in my bunch, cuz he really an asshole, but good-writed asshole. I like him because he just an average guy who you can see in public place and you will never know how envious bitch he can be. I like him for THIS trait and that he "try to do better but makes situation only worse" which sounds just like meeeee.

But I still don't understand how because of Shrek I start love cannibals and men eaters- btw this meaning about love is my favourite about 'em.

And most of this folks in my list shares trait that they are charismatic folks who can normally work if didn't have manian tough bout replacing someone.

Besides I'm an grown-ass person, who understand what is normal, what not and bebebebebbe let's everything fictional will be fictional, I'm tired of readimg news that somebody killed someone.

But p3d0s? They sucks everywhere- Didn't support, folks, fuck off plz and take therapy if it's not late...

Let's kids be safe...

[silendastral]

Maybe the social battery is dead. Or I'm putting my sleep routine in the ass again, which makes me unable to respond even with my mouth. A lot of irritation by people mixed with euphoria when I get to draw something.

During this time period, I can notice that:

- It's quite strange and funny when you have an eternal dialogue or discussion in your head. At the same time, you are only indirectly involved there, since avatars act under emotions or judgments, and not you personally in the dark void under the spotlight. One corner of this part of mind flared up with rage and began to scream and destroying everything, the second decided to start a family, the third just zoning out into the wall.

- RP helped me to notice one of my problems that I intend to solve: the fear of talking about my feelings of discomfort or, conversely, love (romantic. I can easily tell a friend that I love them, because everything is like siblings to me, but romantic feelings - UGH). It's really so stupid with discomfort, because I understand that in the end it will accumulate anyway, and I will explode, but it seems to be on the subcortex of consciousness that I will be ignored. And sometimes my quibbles are just a subjective opinion, and other people may have a hard time in life, and here I also express dissatisfaction. I can't do something like that. I don't want hurt.

- It was obvious, of course, but, wow, I'm drawn to those characters who kind of feels like me, but at the same time know how to be confident.

- "Maybe I can't be the best of everyone, but I can set myself the goal of becoming better than a particular person in a particular field" - interesting thought, cuz, well, you in your head kill someone, created a war of kingdoms, seized power through rebellion, but other artist don't know, that your teeth are gritting on them.