@cantteachanoldguardnewquotes my dear ♥♥♥ and nonnie! thank you for sending this! I’ve decided to go with 7 because I have thought long and hard about 49 but I couldn’t come up with anything that I like. So I hope this one is just as good! I promise it’s a happy ending!
Send me kaysanova prompts from this list!
7. “When you’re happy, I’m happy.”
Joe was an agglomerate of character traits that Nicky had learned and knew like the back of his hand. Nothing could be kept hidden from him. He was able to read Joe’s smallest facial expression, the most invisible eyebrow twitch, a change in the volume of his voice, different ways of holding him that meant different things.
Joe was Nicolò’s favourite book - and right now Nicky was trying to read through the chapters that were leading the plot somewhere he was really not sure about.
Not that the narration was any different. The words were very familiar to Nicky. Joe’s silence was being narrated inside Nicky’s head, but like every other time, he didn’t know how the story was going to end.
Yusuf had spoken very little and very softly for the past couple of days. Anyone else would’ve said that this was very out of character for him, but not Nicky. No, this was part of who his husband was, just as much as his laughter and endless stream of words and his smile that lit up the room and Nicky’s soul.
It had been a couple of months since they’d left Booker behind and, maybe for that exact reason, Andy had thrown them straight into the next mission, which she’d found herself, rather than waiting for someone to ask for their help. Everyone in the team knew why she’d done it. It was her way of coping when losing a soldier. However, she hadn’t asked for anyone’s opinion and that had caused some bubbling resentment, which was never vocalised anyway.
Nile had barely had the chance of settling in and warming up to them. They had only managed to share a few details about themselves, but now they were getting ready to leave for Sweden to meet Andy’s contact and Nile was already learning the basics of the weapons they had and which ones to bring and to leave behind. She wasn’t complaining: the Marine still in her was telling her to be quiet and listen to Andy, even though she might have been feeling a little bit out of place still.
Joe was being quiet too, but not in the same way. Nicky had been following him with his eyes for the whole day, silently checking on him in between one bag being packed and the other. His husband had only made eye contact with him for a total of possibly 3 times, which was the main thing that had prompted Nicky to gently pull him aside at one point and lock both of them in the bathroom.
“My heart, I need you to either tell me what’s going on or start smiling for me again because this day has been absolutely insufferable.”
One corner of Nicky’s lips lifted slightly, whilst he put his hands on his hips. He wasn’t mad at Joe and Joe knew. He was just trying to get him to talk now, before they got on a plane for Stockholm and had to dedicate themselves to the mission completely.
Joe sighed, resting with his back against the bathroom door, his arms crossed on his chest. He was looking at the floor, but it only took him a few seconds before looking up to meet Nicky’s eyes. His eyebrows were lifted and his forehead was slightly wrinkled, which meant something was weighing on his shoulders and he needed to talk about it. Nicky knew. Joe... Joe always needed a little bit of prodding. He always thought he was the one appointed to listen to other people’s problems and that no one had to be put through what was troubling his mind instead.
“I just thought... I just thought I was going to be given some time.”
The smile faded from Nicky’s face, but he didn’t move. He knew exactly was Joe was talking about. Booker’s ghost was still floating around in between them, everywhere they went, but the fact that Andy had been so hellbent on finding another mission for them hadn’t given them the chance to actually sit down and talk about it. That, and the fact that she didn’t want to sit down and talk about it.
It wasn’t a question. Nicky knew Joe more than anyone in the world and they very rarely needed to ask questions anymore.
“Is this why you haven’t been sleeping much?”
Nicky pressed his own lips together, but only had to think about it a few instants and he had already reached Joe, his hands cupping his bearded face, bodies gently and lazily pressed against each other.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
“Not... not now. We need to pack our things, we need to go to Sweden.”
Joe was right. The flight was booked for 7am the following day and they had too many things to bring with them.
“Joe, we’re not going back to the other room until we’ve settled this.”
Nicky’s thumbs started moving lightly on Joe’s skin, trying to soothe him, trying to gently massage the thoughts out of his head and his mouth.
Nicky knew how unbearably overwhelmed with emotions Joe could become and how hard it could be for him to put it in words when he was feeling so much, so he needed some encouragement.
“We can’t, Nico, you still haven’t packed your sniper rifle...”
Nicky sighed loudly, rolling his eyes towards the ceiling, then rested his forehead against Joe’s, pressing his fingers a bit deeper into Joe’s skin. It was a way to tell him to stop being silly, without actually telling him off.
“What do you need?” Nicky asked, the voice reduced to a whisper.
Nicky nodded, still not pulling away.
“But we don’t have any.” Joe added, eyes now closed, hands gently on Nicky’s sides.
“We do.” Nicky replied, touching the tip of Joe’s nose with his own. This prompted Joe to look at him again, and Nicky welcomed him with a warm smile.
“We’re not going anywhere. Actually, I’ll do you one better. You and I are going to Malta.”
Joe’s eyebrow lifted upwards a little bit and his lips parted ever so slightly. He was confused.
“You are overwhelmed.” Nicky explained, separating their foreheads only to give himself room to caress Joe’s curls on his forehead - gestures that oozed affection, affection that Nicky only reserved to Joe and especially in these moments, when Joe was so vulnerable. “None of us have had time to process what happened and I cannot bear to see you like this any longer. We all need a break and I am sure Andy and Nile will come to that conclusion soon for themselves, but if you need to go, I am coming with you.”
Nicky could clearly see tears pooling up inside Joe’s eyes, but his husband didn’t flinch. He just kept looking at him, like one would with a deity.
“But the mission... It’s an observation one, you can do your sniping work as much as you want, I can’t take this away from you...” Joe whispered, his voice trembling. Nicky stopped him halfway through, grabbing his face again.
“Yusuf. Stop. I don’t care. When you’re happy, I am happy. And you are not happy. So we’re going to Malta. Have I made myself clear?” Nicky asked, lifting one eyebrow, but with the shadow of a smile clearly clinging on his lips.
Joe kept his eyes on him for a few seconds, then relaxed his shoulders, closed his eyes and nodded. He then proceeded to lean forward, hunching himself against Nicky so that he could end up with his forehead on Nicky’s shoulder. Nicky was ready to hug him, to wrap his arms around Joe’s shoulders. One hand ended up in Joe’s hair at the nape of the neck.
Joe wasn’t crying, not yet. Nicky knew that he would probably find the strength to let his emotions come out once they would be alone in Malta.
For now, he was going to keep being his pillar - for as long as Yusuf needed it.
