I am free! This was intended to be a reblog with more ideas but then I went absolutely mad, I'm afraid there's no cure. Writing is so much harder than I remember it being...
I had most certainly not been planning on writing these two until I pulled them and learned more about how they actually work and think. So hopefully they're not terribly out of character. I tried my best.
@get-groovei take your farm girls. I hope you like it as much I liked your siriace thoughts.
Sirius yawned as she stumbled out the back door, relying on muscle memory and the porch handrails to guide her down the steps. It was too early to be up, the sun was barely starting to rise, but Ace apparently had something that just couldn't wait and had gotten up all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, and the bed had quickly grown cold without her. Even if Sirius had been able to go back to sleep, one of them being up meant that the menagerie had decided it was now breakfast time and she would not know peace until they were fed. She would have been impressed by the teamwork they managed, if only it wasn't being used to make her get up at the crack of dawn.
“Hey!” She barked as she felt a small body push past her legs, almost making her stumble. She lifted two fingers to her mouth and blew a shrill wolf-whistle. When she opened her eyes again, all her lovely obedient dogs had lined up, sitting pretty in front of her. She smirked. “Good puppies,” she crooned, giving each a few pets as she passed them. “Stay.”
She had performed this morning ritual so many times she could do it with her eyes closed; head to the feeding area, grab kibble bag number one, rip the top, balance it in your arms so you don't topple it and send kibble scattering everywhere, tip kibble into dog bowls until bag is empty, grab bag number two and rinse repeat until all bowls have food. So it wasn't until she was crouching down to open the second bag that she realised she wasn't alone. In fairness, a furry muzzle near her face usually meant one of her puppies had broken rank and needed more obedience training. She was most certainly not expecting to look up and almost be nose to nose with a creature she'd never seen on the farm before. Brown pelt, big black nose, narrower muzzle than the pups leading back to a very differently shaped head, and blank empty eyes staring into hers that made her ears pin back. 'That's not a dog!’
“...Hel-LO?! Can I fucking HELP YOU?!” The dumb beast didn't even have the decency to blink. She leaned away and it leaned forward to follow her, still staring. She'd later claim she intentionally went to scare it but in reality seeing it come in closer had triggered some long dormant instinct in her brain that screamed ‘Get that thing out of my face NOW!’ She pushed herself forward quickly and shouted, something quick and loud and definitely not words. It worked, and the creature startled back a distance with no grace in its steps. But it didn't run away and Sirius felt herself gritting her teeth, tail thrashing behind her. Something pressed up against her back and, oh, maybe it wasn't her that it had been scared by. One of her bigger pups, a massive St Bernard who had taken a protective leadership role in her pack, was looming over her shoulder and staring down the intruder. He wasn't baring his teeth or growling but she could tell he was close to doing so. And now that she was paying attention to her surroundings again, she could hear the rest of the pack whimpering and growling, but they didn't sound close so they must still be sitting where she left them. Good dogs. She brought a hand up to rest on the St Bernard’s scruff and took a better look at their intruder.
With the added distance, she could now see the hooved feet and white spots that decorated its flanks. Huh, she’d never actually seen a deer up close before…it was uglier than she thought it would be. It was also apparently really stupid, because despite being stared down by a predator it began to step towards her again. Sirius stood up quickly, her back and knees aching at the sudden movement, and it stopped but it still did not retreat. And then she heard laughter, bright and loud and full of cheer. She could go deaf and she reckoned she'd still be able to recognise it.
“ACE!” She definitely did not shriek, not taking her eyes off the creature. “ACE, DO SOMETHING!”
“It's just a deer, Sirius!” She sounded way too entertained about this.
“Why is it here?!”
“It probably wants the kibble.”
“It's not getting any! HEY!” The deer had begun walking towards her again, or more likely, towards the dog food bag she was holding and the already full bowls. She snapped her hand at it, trying to shoo it away. “No! None for you! GET!” It stared at her like she was a particularly loud fly. A frustrated growl crawled up her throat. “Can it even eat dog food?!”
“It's not good for them but they'll eat it anyway.”
“Great…” She stamped her foot near it and that finally made it back up a few steps again. She'd already left her pack waiting too long. She pointed at the deer. “You! Stay!...Stay.” She chose to ignore the snort of laughter she could hear from Ace’s direction. And against all odds, it looked like the deer was listening to her. She kept a watch out of the corner of her eye as she finally got around to filling the rest of the dog bowls but it seemed content to stay where it was. She stepped back and, eyes still on the deer, blew another whistle out into the yard.
“Alright! Food time!” And on command all of her puppies came rushing into the area. She lost track of the deer for a bit, busy weaving around her pack, directing some dogs to other bowls as ones got too crowded and making sure everyone was accounted for. So she was a little surprised to look up and see the deer still where she'd left it, albeit with her St Bernard standing in front of it like a stony-faced guard. “Oi! Go eat!” She waved him off and he reluctantly abandoned his post, leaving her to glare down at the unrepentant deer.
“You. This is what you want, right?” She opened up a hand full of kibble in front of it, and the deer took a step closer to her, nose twitching. She lifted her hand out of its reach. “Can you ask for it?”
“Siri, I don't think it's going to sit for you!” She had to try. At least it wasn't jumping on her, that put it above some of her pups when she first started working with them. She sighed and tossed the kibble on the ground, the deer leisurely beginning to eat without a care.
“And after this, you leave. Understand?” It did not even bother looking up at her. She gave one last grumble before turning and making her way out of the dog feeding area. Ace was leaning against a nearby fence, face smudged with dirt and gardening gloves tucked into her belt. Her ears pricked upright when she saw Sirius coming towards her, tail wagging, and Sirius could feel her own doing the same despite her best efforts. A pair of hands reached out towards her making a childish grabbing gesture and Sirius walked straight towards them, the hands latching onto her hips as soon as she was within reach and pulling her close. There was a laugh near her ear and a grin pressed against her temple, and Sirius closed her eyes with a sigh and melted into the soft warmth.
“I heard you shouting,” Ace said softly, and Sirius could feel her turning her head to look at something. “It's a friendly little thing, isn't it?”
“It's dumb as rocks,” Sirius groaned. “If it had any intelligence at all, it would have run at the first sight of the dogs.” And speaking of dogs, she felt a warm furry body pressing up against her legs and looked down to see her wonderful St Bernard at their feet. “And you,” her tone mildly scolding, “are in trouble for not obeying my orders to stay.”
“Aww, come on, Sirius! He was protecting you!” A hand let go from Sirius to reach down and let the pup. “Who's a good boy? You're a good boy!”
“Do not undermine me. He still disobeyed.” But for as much as that was the case, she couldn't find herself being too upset about it. And soon after she also found herself giving in, petting him along with Ace. Moments like this settled deep into her bones; the sounds of the farm waking up, Ace in her arms and her in Ace’s, and a happy dog at their feet to pet. A dream couldn't feel like this.
“...Do you think the deer will stick around?” And there went her good mood. Her ears pinned back once more at Ace’s question and she found herself grimacing.
“It better not be there tomorrow morning!”
It was there the next morning. And the morning after. And by the third morning Ace was pushing almost expired fruits and vegetables into her arms before she went to feed the dogs.
“If it's staying, it can't keep eating the dog food. It'll get sick!”
Turns out the blasted thing liked pumpkin. Who knew.
Almost a week after the first encounter and Sirius was leaning against a fence, Ace pressed up against her shoulder. Evening was settling onto the farm and the two were watching as the dogs got their last bits of energy out for the night. Or at least, she should be watching the dogs, but Sirius kept finding her eyes drifting over to their interloper. The deer was laying comfortably on the grass, far enough away to not be disturbed by any of the dogs, but still well within view. It might even be asleep. Something about it all didn't sit right with her.
“...I'm a bit worried about her too.” Of course Ace knew where her attention really was. Though worried is not the word Sirius would have used to describe it. But something else caught her attention and she spoke before she could think about it.
“‘Her’?” Ace grinned and gestured for Sirius to bring her head closer, pointing at the deer and loudly whispering like she was telling a secret.
“Yeah, she's got no antlers. If she were a buck, she'd have antlers this time of year.” Sirius would take her word for it. Ace lowered her hand and her smile dropped. “...that makes it even more weird, y’know? Hinds aren't meant to be on their own, they're always in herds. You’ll get solo bucks but never hinds. At least, not unless something big happened. But she's not acting like she's upset or stressed.” Sirius didn't think she'd ever seen a less stressed animal. And there certainly weren't any deer hiding out of sight nearby; Ace had been keeping a close eye on their crops and they didn't even bear the signs of their single known deer nibbling at them, never mind a whole herd. Sirius shrugged and turned her head into the crook of Ace’s neck.
“It'll be fine. It'll move on once it gets bored, there's no need to worry about it.” But despite her own words, Ace’s comments played again in her head the next morning. It was almost-overripe berries for today and the creature seemed to absolutely love them, especially the strawberries. Sirius had taken a handful and was using them to get the deer to do basic tricks, making her weave in patterns and even spin around in a slow circle while Sirius thought. “Maybe you just don't like other deer…” Sirius muttered, giving the deer her earned treat. “Is that something your kind can decide?” Of course the deer didn't respond to her, merely delicately taking the last strawberry from her.
Sirius hmm’d, watching the deer eat. She was remarkably well-behaved when she wasn't demanding dog food. And her spots were rather nice looking now that Sirius was used to them, she was understanding why deer pelts were sought after. The deer looked up at her, staring and chewing slowly. Sirius’ tail flicked as a thought came to her and, after a moment of hesitation, she lifted a hand and put it on the deer’s muzzle. The fur was rougher than she thought it would be, coarse and brittle against her palm. The deer blinked but did not move. “Maybe we can teach you some manners.”
“Uhhhh….”
The sound made Sirius look over, spotting Ace across the way staring back at her. Ace had clearly frozen mid-step, her face with a faint look of horror on it.
“I…would not be doing that if I were you.” Sirius’ ear twitched and she frowned.
“Why not?”
“...Deers are kinda full of ticks.” Sirius snatched her hand away, tail shooting straight up.
“WHAT?!”
Every childhood fairytale had lied to her, Sirius later thought grimly as she furiously scrubbed her hand and Ace desperately apologised to her. Dumb, graceless, and full of ticks; majestic beasts, her ass!
She spent the night researching tick treatments for deer and several more trying to coax the dumb thing into eating the feed and letting her apply the medicine. At least she always kept on top of the pack’s tick treatment.
A week passed, then two, and at some point the lone deer had become a routine fixture of the farm. Always around at the edges of the farm, never too far away and never bothered by anything. Unless she thought she might get some food out of it. Which is why Sirius noted it when she went out one morning and did not find the hind waiting alongside her pack. Her brows furrowed and she cast her gaze over the farm; nowhere to be seen. She quickly set the dogs up with breakfast before walking a brisk lap around the house but spotting no sign of it.
“Have you seen the deer?” She asked Ace later, the deer having not shown up all day. She’d left the food intended for the hind near the dogs feeding area but had seen no signs of anyone eating at it. Ace grimaced and shook her head.
“No,” Ace’s ears flicked rapidly as Sirius filled her in. “Maybe she’ll show up later?”
The day’s vegetables were still uneaten when she went out the next morning. And the morning after. No sign of a spotted pelt, no half-chewed plants, no squeaky bicycle noises. As suddenly as she’d appeared, she seemed to have disappeared again without a trace. And for as annoying as Sirius had found the creature, it felt…strange, to suddenly have a constant presence be missing. It was aggravating.
Ace gave her a sad smile when a week had passed with not a glimpse of the deer. “Maybe she found a herd,” she offered gently. “It’d be the best thing for her.”
Sirius scoffed and rolled over, tucking against Ace’s side. “She probably got bored and found an easier food source. Probably off terrorizing another farm.” That was how it went with wild animals; you couldn’t keep them, you couldn’t train them, and anything could happen to them. She’d known that. It felt different experiencing it, though.
A second week passed, then longer. Sirius had kept bringing food and looking for her for a while, but it was quickly clear there was no point. It was almost unsettling how easily everything went back to the way it was before the deer had ever shown up. Pack breakfast went back to being dog food only, the vegetables and fruits once given to the hind went back to going into the compost, the extra deer protection around the crops quietly fell to the side. For something that had once carved its own space in the farm, it was so quickly scrubbed away again. It bothered Sirius more than she’d admit that someone could be gone and forgotten almost effortlessly. Well maybe not forgotten yet. But give it time.
She sighed, hefting a bag of animal feed higher into the storage cupboard. She counted it out and frowned. They needed to start stocking up while the weather was still good, and they needed a better way of storing it all so the rats didn’t get into it, she refused to deal with rats, ugh, she’d need to make sure the dogs wouldn’t chase any that did show up, who knows what diseases they pick up-Something was nibbling her TAIL!
A choked screech escaped her as she whipped her tail around, catching it in her hands and pulling it up to her chest. She almost kicked the offending party across the field and only the briefest sight of white spots on brown fur, caught out of the corner of her eye, held her back from doing so. Familiar blank unblinking eyes stared up at her, the owner of them looking practically unchanged since Sirius had last seen her. But that had still been her TAIL in its MOUTH!
“ACE!” Her voice echoed across the farm, immediately sending the dogs all barking and howling, the deer simply watched like she didn't know what all the fuss was about. Sirius hadn't realised something other than Teio could make her feel this particular mix of relief and incandescent rage. “ACE! IT FREAKING BIT ME!”
All the tail care in the world was not going to make her forgive this one. At least Ace was overjoyed that the deer had returned unharmed, and happy to dote on the insult it had given Sirius.
And so a new routine emerged. The deer would stay at their farm for a while, showing up every day for breakfast with the dogs, wandering around the fields, napping on the grass, and occasionally getting herself stuck in a fence and forcing Sirius or Ace to try to free her. And then she'd disappear again, who knew where to, but she'd always return in a few weeks, no worse for wear and demanding food like usual. Sirius and Ace discussed for a bit whether to stick a tag or a tracker on her but ultimately decided against it. In the end, she was a wild animal and always would be. They just got to have her company for a while.
One early morning, several returnings and partings later, Ace looked out their windows and beamed. “CB is back!” Sirius peered over her shoulder but could not spot their bay-haired friend. They'd not been expecting her to visit but CB never gave notice. They were lucky if she even sent an 'I'm here’ text, more often than not she simply surprised them at some point during the day. Sirius had been a little annoyed by it at first but Ace had just laughed it off. “That's just how she is!” She'd said with a grin, watching CB try to coax a barn cat towards her. And Sirius had decided that was a sleeping dog she could let lie. Not that she could currently spot said sleeping dog. She squinted; there were the crop fields, the edge of the patio, the animal feeding area, the deer had returned and was sleeping on the grass, wait- Sirius did a quick double-take, checking where exactly Ace was looking.
“You named the deer?” Dumb question actually, she gave a sigh. “Nevermind, of course you named the deer. Why'd you name it after CB?”
“Well it's just like her, right?” Ace grinned at her, playfully bumping Sirius’ shoulder with her own. “She comes and goes as she pleases, like she's with the wind.”
‘And gives equally few concerns about what other people think of her’, Sirius rolled her eyes and tucked her head into Ace’s neck. CB, the two-legged one, did exactly what she wanted when she wanted. Wandered in after not hearing from her for ages only to have her way too much for a few days. Ate their food, slept on their couch, used all of Sirius’ good shampoo, and then wandered off again. Sirius hummed as she thought about it more; on second thought, maybe it did sound like a certain deer. Ace’s tail started wagging and hitting the back of Sirius’ legs.
“I can hear you thinking,” she teased. “You see it too, you know I’m right!” Her grin was audible in her voice and Sirius couldn't fight back a smile.
“Very well, but you get to tell Uma-CB about her new namesake.” And judging by the little cheer Ace let out at that, that wasn't a deterrent for her.
Or at least that had been the plan, but since when had the deer ever followed what Sirius wanted from it. It was several weeks later, it was starting to become biting cold in the mornings and Sirius was getting less and less enthused about getting up so early. It was days like this she cursed that there was no such thing as a sleep-in on a farm. But the animals weren't going to feed themselves, so she did her best to force herself to be as awake as possible as she called her pack to order.
“Puppies!” She gave a whistle, rubbing the sleep from her eyes. “Sit pretty!” And along with the clatter of paws, there was the distinct sound of hooves joining them. “And good morning to you too, CB, you free-loader.”
“WOW! Rude! What have I done to you recently?”
Sirius almost choked. Eyes wide open now, she looked over to the fence to see CB, the actual uma one, leaning against the railings with an amused grin on her face. She gave a cheeky little wave as Sirius tried to gather her wits and speak.
“Not you! The-The Deer-”
“Yeah! When’d you get a deer?” Two-legged CB leaned over the fence, stretching an arm out to her four-legged counterpart. “Hi there! I want to pet you!” Apparently four-legged CB did have some sense after all and refused to go closer to her.
“CB!” Ace’s cry of joy was probably heard in the next farm over, the black-haired uma moving at speed to meet her friend. Then she caught sight of the menagerie and her grin only grew. “And little CB too!”
‘Big’ CB’s ears pricked up at that. “Oh?”
Sirius could only drag her hands down her face as Ace filled CB in on not only the name but the whole embarrassing story of how exactly a wild deer decided to move in without permission, both of them grinning wildly. Said deer moved towards her and Sirius cast a glare at her; as far as she was concerned, deer CB was entirely to blame for this situation. The two other umas reached a part in the story that made them both burst out laughing and Sirius decided she’d had enough of this.
“Sirius! Where are you going?” Ace’s voice called merrily after her, clearly still grinning. Her pups would never betray her like this.
“I'm going to go cuddle the dogs!” She shouted over her shoulder, marching off with the pack at her heels. She gave the deer a little push to the chest when it stumbled into her trying to follow. “You are not welcome.”
The deer followed her anyway. Ace’s laughter followed her like bells as she left.
i enjoy them and think theyre cute!!! they give me oblivious cat x "constantly dropping hints" dog + their strong personalities and ambitions about racing make them a very interesting pair!!! .. plus the sirius bday convo with ace and cb is obviously very funny LOL i like the way they banter! thinking abt it they kinda remind me of susie and kris from deltarune (<- guy currently fixated on deltarune voice. getting a lot of deltarune vibes from this)
