#sisterdonor

[sistereggs-blog-blog]

Testing, Testing, 1,2,3

My doctor gave us the name of a very well known Infertility Clinic in Denver, where T lives, so that she could do the preliminary testing or the "Egg Donor Baseline Testing" where she lives. This testing is crucial and will tell us if T will be a good candidate for egg donation. Because we are in Massachusetts, we need to have this done right now on day 3 of her cycle so that we can get all of her results back in time for the next step, which will be her genetic testing and counseling (and will happen in MA over Thanksgiving when she's home for the holiday).

I called the Denver clinic on a Sunday, no answer, tried to leave a message but was not successful. Called Monday morning, was told that they would call me back. Called again 1 hour later. Now, I know this seems aggressive, but the testing NEEDED to be done on Tuesday Morning, so I needed to schedule the appointment as soon as possible. I was so stressed out I could barely get anything else done all day. I was told that I needed to speak with someone who was on the other line. Fine. An hour later she called back. It was the wrong person. She told me someone ELSE would call me back. I begged her to let me hold or help me herself as it was time sensitive. Nope.

At this point, it was already halfway through Monday and I was in a full on panic. My sister needed to tell her supervisor what time she would be out the next day, and I needed to have my nurse forward the orders from my doctor. Long, very long story short, they didn't call me back until 4:45 to tell me that they couldn't help me. I was fuming. And hysterically crying. Little T was giving me "smooches" to make me feel better because I was such a basketcase.

That's when I turned to Doctor Google, who pointed me in the direction of another Denver infertility clinic called Conceptions. They were so helpful and they were kind. They were able to schedule an appointment for my sister for the next day. I was so relieved. I had another good cry.

T was finally set up for her baseline testing.

[sistereggs-blog-blog]

The backstory.

I started this blog not only for me, but for anyone else who is considering egg donation in the family. I will chronicle the IVF cycle I am about to start on with my youngest sister as egg donor. First, a history. I am going to really try to keep it as short as possible, but it's been a long haul, so find someplace comfortable to sit, this could take a minute.

My husband J and I started dating in 1999. We moved in together in 2003. Got engaged in 2007 and were married in September 2008. We started trying for a baby right around the time of our wedding. It was not something we thought would happen RIGHT away, but we figured within a few months we'd be pregnant. Fast forward 2 long and sometimes really difficult years and we were considering seeing a specialist. It just seemed like it should have happened by the two year mark. In October 2010, I decided to contact my doctor and set up some testing, but wanted to get through a few weddings and events we were to attend first. Then on October 20th, after being 5-6 days late, I took a pregnancy test and it was positive. We couldn't believe it, but we were thrilled.

After a relatively easy pregnancy (my only complaint was a small amount of nausea, though I would definitely not have categorized it that way while I was experiencing it) I gave birth to our Daughter Little T in July 2011. We could NOT have been more excited to welcome her. It was the best day of our lives.

After Little T hit about 6 months old I was already thinking about and planning for our next addition to the family. We had always talked about having 3-4 kids and keeping them fairly close in age. We tried for another difficult year before deciding it was time to see a doctor.

After some testing in January of 2013, we discovered that I have High FSH, which just means that my eggs have aged well before they should have and my ovaries are trying harder to get them going. This was a devastating blow. I've never had major problems with my period and I'm very fit and healthy, so i really couldn't understand why this had happened. And the worst part is that no one could tell me why it had happened either.

The doctor recommended going straight to IVF, which we agreed with, given the time factor. Insurance felt differently, however, so we did a failed IUI in February 2013. It was sad, but we were kind of expecting a negative, considering that I did not have any tubal issues or blockages that we knew of. We hated the fact that it cost us around $3000 for nothing. It was time to move on to IVF and insurance was finally on board. We did our first failed IVF in May of 2013. It was devastating, as I didn't even make it to retrieval. I didn't have enough eggs, so it was converted to an IUI. This also meant that I was officially categorized as DOR (Diminished Ovarian Reserve). I was crushed. It cost us another $6,000. I am leaving out the expenses like acupuncture, vitamins, supplements, etc. that really added to the financial stress of all of this.

In August 2013, we embarked on our second IVF. This one went a lot better. I had 6 eggs at retrieval. We were so pleased. Until we got the call the next morning. Only 2 eggs had survived fertilization. But two was enough! So we went forward with the transfer on day two of only one egg, because we lost one the night before. After a very long, very hormonal, very difficult 2 week wait we got our negative beta. This cycle cost us the most at around $12K, if you're keeping track. At this point, I had decided that we would move forward with Egg Donation. I couldn't spend more money on my clearly spoiled eggs. My sister, K had offered me her eggs. K is an amazing sister who is a year younger than I am at 32. She has no children and is not married. She is a lesbian who is not interested in having a bio kid. After K offered, I started setting up her testing. I was so happy and feeling so grateful.  Then my other sister who is 11 years younger than me, T offered her eggs too. I was overcome. I set up her testing too and made an appointment with my doctor. Here is where the story starts.